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/k/ - Weapons

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There's no discharge in the war!

File: 6e1a61c906c051f⋯.jpeg (271.82 KB, 960x1660, 48:83, 17F5B1BB-B7A6-4941-9715-0….jpeg)

4b2f2b  No.659807

/k/ what’s the best way to hunt down the four types of Bigfoot’s we know of so far?

Type 1 bigfoot, A.K.A. The Patty-type.

This is the classic Sasquatch. It looks like a cross between a human and a Mountain gorilla. (mountain gorilla) It has a large, powerful build a thick, broad chest, black hair, and gray skin. Other hair colors reported are brown, auburn, cinnamon, and occasionally white. The head, though massive, has been described as relatively small for the body. Type 1s sometimes develop a sagittal crest which can look like a person wearing a hoodie. They have a conspicuous brow ridge with a receding forehead, giving the eyes a deep-set look. The eyes are hard to see, but have been reported to be proportionately further apart than a human's eyes. Type 1s have a flat face with prominent cheekbones and a square jaw. The mouth region is only slightly protuberant. The nose is near human in shape, though "pug" or flat, sometimes with forward directed nostrils. The height average for the sampled population is 7’ 10, however, alpha males have been reported at 9' and larger. The average Type 1 is estimated to weigh between 500-800 pounds.

type 2 the more ape-like than the Type 1s.

They're reported in many areas of North America, but especially in the South. Type 2s have a bestial man-like build and large eyes with a large pupil dilation for night vision. The hair is most often reported as black, but Auburn, orange, and cinnamon have been reported. A bit smaller than the Type 1s, the Average height is around 7 feet. Type 2s tend to be very territorial and can be aggressive. They seem to kill a lot of livestock, especially the smaller varieties such as goats and chickens. Type 2s leave human-like footprints but can seem very much like known primates, especially chimps, orangutans and Bili apes

Type 3 something like a mandrill/human mix.

They look similar to a bigfoot but more "savage" or primal. Descriptions of the face vary, but the most reports describe a large, dog/bear/baboon-faced, bipedal mammal. Type 3s can be extremely tall (10' report - 15' report) with oversized heads that look more monster-like than ape-like. They tend to live up in the mountains but will come down for food. The fur is typically dark, or deep brown. One witness reported seeing a Type 3 wearing animal pelts over their fur (hear report.) They may eat humans, but reports of man-eating are rare and often based on very old legends. Type 3s tend to incite reports of paranormal characteristics, like having glowing red eyes, or being bulletproof at close range. Check this out: Dogman Encounters Episode 85, an eyewitness (ex-military) goes looking for a bipedal canid, but finds a Type 3, it's a very cool account. "Type 3" is a very recent classification, traditionally these types were called Kukwes, or Gugwes, a kind of man-eating ogre from Mi'kmaq Indian folklore. Check out this interview with Brian "Duke" Sullivan on Sasquatch Chronicles.

Type 4 reports often come from the North/North East.

They have been referred to as Early Man Bigfoot and the American Almas. They are the most human-looking of the hairy bipedal humanoids possessing traits of archaic/prehistoric man. They're typically a bit leaner than the Type 1s, but are still large, and well-muscled. A hairy Homo Heidelbergensis (link) is a decent model for the Type 4. They have less facial hair than the other types. The crown of the head can have thinning hair, or even be bald on top. Some eyewitnesses have reported beards and moustaches ranging from just noticeable to fully grown. Type 4s have round (not conical) heads. Their noses are hooded. The mouth is wider than what we would consider normal. The teeth are square and human-looking. The skin color is pasty gray or black with a leathery appearance. Some people think these are hybrids, part human, part novel primate. They may be, but all members of the genus Homo developed and used tools. There are no reports of Type 4s using tools of any kind. If they are human — even pre-modern — why would they stop creating and using tools?

This paper by Aaron Mills, Gerald Mills, M. N. Townsend is an analysis of tooth marks found on piles of bones in the Mt. St. Helens area. They make an excellent case for the existence of an undiscovered extant Hominin. "The totality of the evidence analysis very conclusively proves that a new “Hominin” species with an estimated height of over 8’8” is currently living and feeding upon various ungulate (Cervidae) species in the immediate vicinity of Mount St. Helen’s."

The other more mysterious Bigfoot types like skunk ape or the Florida wild monkeys

http://www.bigfoot411.com/bigfoot-types.html

d2ddc9  No.659813

>>659807

Napalm the forest. Best way to hunt anything. If it's so big, you should be able to easily find the bones.


acf81a  No.659819

Nigger there are two other /x/ threads up right now.


3b9699  No.659823

>>659807

A gun. A large gun, if you want to be particular.


43720d  No.659824

Reminder to buy .999 fine silver, melt it and turn it into shotgun 00 pellets. It isn't as expensive as it sounds, it won't cost you more than $100 for 50+ shells capable of committing cryptid genocide.


4b2f2b  No.659827

>>659819

If /pol/ could have multiple meme threads up on /k/. Why can’t /x/?


3b9699  No.659829

>>659827

Because everything /x/-related is retarded, has been discussed to death and is only tangentially related to /k/


4b2f2b  No.659839

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>659829

>only tangentially related to /k/

>imllying Killing big hairy black apes and furries is only tageentially /k/ related

I bet you say weaponizing monkeys isn’t /k/


d2ddc9  No.659846

>>659839

Which brings up the question: How would you weaponize a tamed bigfoot?

I'm thinking, since its large and probably fast, maybe we could give it a helmet-mounted LMG and a guy riding on its shoulders to operate the gun. Bigfoot cavalry.


f764f7  No.659850

>>659846

Why not find out if it's big enough to fire a (very light) field gun from the shoulder?


4b2f2b  No.659856

Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>659846

>Which brings up the question: How would you weaponize a tamed bigfoot?

Hire them as actresses for all female reboots of old propaganda films?


4b2f2b  No.660000

>>659850

Why not train a Bigfoot to be a sniper?


ddb364  No.660001

File: 65f1e35d1485168⋯.jpg (31.71 KB, 325x346, 325:346, 65f1e35d1485168a9a8fbf1760….jpg)

>>659839

>you will never have your pet drug monkey rip some niggers face off and steal their spare magazines during a gunfight


0d3deb  No.660003

>>659856

underrated post


c29e28  No.660017

File: 38abcfb669de915⋯.jpg (23.63 KB, 880x381, 880:381, akmn.jpg)

>>659807

If you're gonna larp innawoods with the boys, you might as well go above and beyond everyone else, and bring one of these bad boys in working condition.


8d345a  No.660027

File: 77e43cc36b98b66⋯.jpg (52.93 KB, 401x600, 401:600, neanderthal_with_spear.jpg)

>>659846

Sasquatch special ops. Show the enemy the true meaning of gorilla warfare.


4b2f2b  No.660071

File: 83101110485a683⋯.jpeg (1.48 MB, 960x3241, 960:3241, F7F4FA48-0836-4B3A-AC2F-B….jpeg)

>>660027

>>660001

Now how are we going to weaponize the dogman? There at least seven types of Dogmen.


8d345a  No.660083

File: 93b77d9427ff43b⋯.gif (1.59 MB, 954x1773, 106:197, Saint_christopher_cynoceph….gif)

>>660071

Military chaplains/warrior monks.


03b3be  No.660103

You need a gun that shoots faeries.

Or nukes.


4b2f2b  No.660155

>>660083

Your a man of taste.


4b2f2b  No.660156

>>660103

Why waste a bullet when aids is good at stopping fairies?


e0f79d  No.660556

File: 471a470f75b3427⋯.jpg (365.55 KB, 1200x1600, 3:4, saint christopher.jpg)

>>660071

>>659807

Here's a interesting parallel.

>Type 3 something like a mandrill/human mix.

>They look similar to a bigfoot but more "savage" or primal. Descriptions of the face vary, but the most reports describe a large, dog/bear/baboon-faced, bipedal mammal. Type 3s can be extremely tall (10' report - 15' report) with oversized heads that look more monster-like than ape-like. They tend to live up in the mountains but will come down for food. The fur is typically dark, or deep brown. One witness reported seeing a Type 3 wearing animal pelts over their fur (hear report.)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cynocephaly#Ancient_Greece_and_Egypt

>Similarly, the Greek traveller Megasthenes claimed to know about dog-headed people in India who lived in the mountains, communicated through barking, wore the skins of wild animals

>The Greek word (Greek: κῠνοκέφᾰλοι) "dog-head" also identified a sacred Egyptian baboon with the face of a dog.

>>659824

There's nothing unholy about relict Gigantopithecus populations and Cynocephali, especially not the later. pic related


979e76  No.675756

lolol




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