9ab016 No.8168 [Last50 Posts]
Dear Anons,
What is femdom?
We all know that it is female domination, but what does it actually mean for a woman to dominate you?
>A woman in latex and high heels stomping on your balls
No, that's just a man's idea of how we want women to dominate us.
What would a woman get out of stomping on your balls? There are other threads in this board about how hard it is to find a dom. Isn't that indication enough that traditional femdom isn't about what your average woman wants?
So what DO women want?
I have two words for you. Emotional Labor.
They want guys to be thoughtful, that's what's sexy for women. If you want to truly submit to women, you have to do what they desire. You have to see things from their perspective.
"OP" I hear you say "Emotional labor sounds like some feminist buzzword". Ok, well there's a pdf of stories from women about their experiences with men failing to provide emotional labor so have a read through it (All 49 pages of it), and get back to me.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B0UUYL6kaNeBTDBRbkJkeUtabEk/view?pref=2&pli=1
>or if you don't trust OP, google the Metafilter Thread on Emotional Labor, and you should find the PDF
____________________________
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b4bd5b No.8170
I'm having a hard time understanding how 'emotional labor' relates to femdom. It sounds more like something you would expect in a normal relationship, but it's like you say. It's more of a personal definition.
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27bfa6 No.8171
>>8170
>I'm having a hard time understanding how 'emotional labor' relates to femdom.
I guess if you crank it up to eleven, you're pampering her?
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9989eb No.8172
>>8171
>that pic
this is my dream
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33424a No.8173
>>8168
Women resort to femdom because they want to vent the stress they got from emotional labour? Or are you telling us that WE need to learn how to do emotional labour for our women?
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9ab016 No.8175
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2e121d No.8176
>>8175
So, just be her friendzoned orbiter who listens to all of her problems?
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8ffb93 No.8177
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fe03a0 No.8180
>emotional labour
But isn't doing real labour enough?
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3bc072 No.8277
>>8176
Be her orbiter who listens to all her problems.
Whether or not she friendzones you is up to her.
This is about doing what women actually want you to do, not just masturbating to conventional BDSM fantasies. Turns out, they want men doing emotional labor.
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ea86a9 No.8285
>>8168
>>8170
>>8171
>emotional labor
A term for the desires of women with daddy issues. Ever go to a meeting of ordinary feminists? They bitch and moan and claim to just want a man to 'hear them out' but in reality they just want to verbally abuse a man because they're pissed about their dads and can't acknowledge that they ruined men for them. They are are secretly into maledom -due to their suffered abuse -but rage-larp as femdoms as a result of Freudian splitting.
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dbd01d No.8287
>>8168
>The complete lack of empathy where you can't even conceive that the thing you dont' want to do bc it's not relaxing is also not relaxing for the other person. Oy.
>Oy.
why am i not surprised.
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9de336 No.8288
>>8285
Post your psychology degree.
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cfb9e8 No.8292
I never got the 'emotional labor' term, is it meant to be a hardship to care about your loved ones? what le fuck is wrong with millennials
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c34e38 No.8293
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>emotional labor
My dumbass bitch ex used this term. I couldn't be bothered to figure out what she meant, but I got a sense that it was feminist garbage.
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b2f589 No.8295
>>8292
I imagine it's something more like, "I am specifically working on emotionally understanding myself, which makes me more ready and able to understand you and your needs."
"Emotional labor" is loaded because of the word "labor" in this context, I think. Self-examination and empathy is another way of putting it, if my interpretation of the term in this context is correct.
I have not had that experience universally. Some people - women or not, but especially young "high social value" women - are not in a stage in their development where they want to grow. As the saying goes, "Girls just want to have fun" and at least here in Los Angeles that is painfully apparent.
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74d950 No.8296
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9de336 No.8340
>>8292
As far as I can tell, it is literally something that only exists in the minds of certain women - but they think that everybody demands it of them.
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7543e0 No.8342
>>8292
You're supposed to care about each other, your wife isn't supposed to remember everything for you like you are a retarded child.
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cdd935 No.8348
I want to be a supportive guy for my gf, I enjoy emotional labor because she values it
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b5692b No.8349
>>8168
>We all know that it is female domination, but what does it actually mean for a woman to dominate you?
>No, that's just a man's idea of how we want women to dominate us.
>What would a woman get out of stomping on your balls?
A virgin faggots idea of femdom…
Look… just because a couple is into femdom doesn't mean that she has to hate him. Maybe she likes inflicting pain onto others. Or she simply likes doing things that make him happy. A woman who hates you is not going to start a relationship with you. This is why cuckolding is a shit fetish. You get these "my wife is so out of my league, it's totally normal that I never get to fuck her and she cheats on me every day"… If she hates you, or she is sooo out of your league she wouldn't start dating you…
femdom means female domination, as long as she is in charge it is female domination. Even if you enjoy having her beat you up or whatever turns you on.
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b5692b No.8350
>>8171
that shit is sooo fucking gay. What the hell is a woman supposed to do with a guy who is locked away.
>>8172
>this is my dream
you are a worthless faggot. How, and more importantly why would you want anything like that? Are you a fat, small dicked nigger or something? Do you hate yourself so much that not even in your fantasies you can have a happy relationship? Are you so fucking gay that your dream relation ship is to have a hot gf who locks you away and doesn't allow you to fuck her?
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7543e0 No.8352
>>8349
But that's exactly it, cuckolding is another male-centric fetish that is just about what the man wants. You're agreeing with OP as far as I'm concerned.
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7543e0 No.8353
>>8285
>Ever go to a meeting of ordinary feminists?
Yeah, they were pretty friendly and I had a great time, what about it?
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61fb64 No.8354
>>8350
>What the hell is a woman supposed to do with a guy who is locked away.
Teasing the ever loving shit out of him? I seriously can´t understand how people get so riled up over such a vanilla fetish.
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7543e0 No.8356
>>8354
You can also tease and deny without a cage, the people that are upset are literally mad at the physical cage because they don't want to do that themselves.
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01ad91 No.8359
>>8352
>cuckolding is another male-centric fetish that is just about what the man wants
only if the female part isn't into it too. If both of them enjoy it, it stops being about what he wants, it's what both want.
>>8354
>Teasing the ever loving shit out of him?
Go into a random club and hand one of these cages to one of the girls. Tell them they can lock you up and play with you. How many of them do you think will agree to that? I can tell you, no one will. Because they get nothing out of it. It's same with this bullshit cfnm fetish… People who have these kinds of fetishes think that women don't enjoy sex.
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61fb64 No.8360
>>8359
>Go into a random club and hand one of these cages to one of the girls. Tell them they can lock you up and play with you.
I guess that going to a random girl and telling her she should do kinky thing x to you is generally a really bad idea, but what do i know.
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61fb64 No.8361
>>8359
>It's same with this bullshit cfnm fetish… People who have these kinds of fetishes think that women don't enjoy sex.
We once had a femanon here who posted that cfnm was actually her favorite fetish.
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a827bc No.8371
>>8361
Well there are people who eat shit… so… I don't know why the opinion of a single person is so important here. And there is a difference between actual cfnm, and what people think cfnm means.
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668280 No.8372
>>8371
>Well there are people who eat shit… so…
Wow, what an incredible great argument. And if an opinion of a single peson doesn´t matter then why should your opinion matter, friend?
>And there is a difference between actual cfnm, and what people think cfnm means.
Cfnm means closed female naked male, which seems pretty straightforward to me. I dunno how there can be different interpretation of this fetish.
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a827bc No.8375
>>8372
>which seems pretty straightforward to me. I dunno how there can be different interpretation of this fetish.
Because in mainstream culture CFNM usually means Clothed Female getting fucked by Naked Male. How exactly is it "CF" when the female is bottomless? Someone leaked this cfnm fetish to normies and they are wrongly interpreting it.
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cfde9b No.8377
>>8354
I mean yeah, she can do that. Or she can have actual, you know, sex.
I've only been in one actual relationship so take this with a grain of salt, but no matter how big a game my ex talked about wanting to tie me down tease me and fuck me in the ass with a strap on she always was happier and more satisfied when I grabbed her writs and plowed her through the god damn bed.
You know when this sort of clicked for me? I bought her some rope (she said she wanted to tie me up and learn shibari) and every time she tried something she just got mad and cursed up a storm while following whatever step-by-step instructions she qeued up. She still finished (and it was fun for both of us), but it was a lot of undue stress that she, quite frankly, would rather have done without.
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8b1f7a No.8379
>>8377
>I mean yeah, she can do that. Or she can have actual, you know, sex.
Well, that´s true for every fetish. Why footworship, when you can have sex? Why face sitting when you can have sex? Why dressing up in weird leather outfits when you can have sex? Maybe because just sex itself gets boring after a time?
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f2160c No.8380
>>8379
>Maybe because just sex itself gets boring after a time?
Is this what you write on your Tinder Profile? Is this how you cash in on all the hotties? You tell them that normal sex is to boring for you? You only do fun shit like footworship? Ohh I bet the girls get all wet thinking about you worshiping their feet. Because this is what every women ultimately wants… A loser numale boyfriend to gay to fuck her who would rather just kneel at her feet.
You are either a virgin or autistic.. or perhaps both… Normal sex doesn't get boring that fast. You are most likely a virgin who watched so much porn that he thinks vanilla sex is bad. Now there are some people who can't get off without a certain fetish, but those guys are addicted faggits.
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9de336 No.8381
>>8350
> What the hell is a woman supposed to do with a guy who is locked away.
Unlock him. Fuck him. And then lock him back up. It's a way of putting the man at the woman's disposal, and giving her control over his body.
>>8354
>chastity
>vanilla
>>8379
>sex
>boring
Found the porn-addicted virgin.
Also
>facesitting isn't sex
????
Oral sex is sex.
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f2160c No.8386
>>8381
>Unlock him. Fuck him. And then lock him back up
Some couples fuck at least twice a day, why go through all that hassle? Just leave it unlocked. This would only ever work for older couples who rarely have sex anymore, and those should just jump off a bridge anyway. Also, I happen to have friends in bdsm circles, and chastity is almost always not worth it. Shit is dirty and on top of that also uncomfortable. There was a time when I wanted to get into that stuff, but my friends told me to not bother with it. You shouldn't take these things that serious… maybe only wear it when you are alone and unlock it every time your gf is around.
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8b1f7a No.8387
>>8381
>chastity
>vanilla
It´s probably the most vanilla fetish out there except maybe foot worship or stuff like that.
>Unlock him. Fuck him. And then lock him back up.
And how is this now different to a chastity fetish? You realize that chastity is not meant to be permanent, right? It´s just an extreme version of teasing.
>sex
>boring
If normal sex is completely sufficient for you then why are you posting on a fetish board?
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f2160c No.8388
>>8387
foot fetish is most likely the most vanilla/common fetish. Didn't they say that 1 out of 5 men have it? What even makes you think that chastity is anywhere near normal? Do you know any person (apart from old exhibitionists) who proudly wear their chastity cage in public? Public sex and flashing is more common than chastity cages.
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8b1f7a No.8390
>>8380
>Is this what you write on your Tinder Profile? Is this how you cash in on all the hotties? You tell them that normal sex is to boring for you? You only do fun shit like footworship? Ohh I bet the girls get all wet thinking about you worshiping their feet. Because this is what every women ultimately wants… A loser numale boyfriend to gay to fuck her who would rather just kneel at her feet.
You know that there are things inbetween being completely vanilla and a complete fetish addict, right? And your posts reek of projecting.
>>8388
>Do you know any person (apart from old exhibitionists) who proudly wear their chastity cage in public?
Yeah, i don´t know any person who wears a chastity cage in public. Probably because fetishes are a private matter and the fact that people wear clothes, you kow? And how does that even make any sense as a question related to the topic?
Do you know any people who do facesitting in public? Do you know any people who do leather fetish orgies in public? Seriously, i don´t even know anymore where you´re trying to go with your argumentation.
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f2160c No.8394
>>8390
>You know that there are things inbetween being completely vanilla and a complete fetish addict, right?
Then list your fetishes, I bet they are all fucked up things that wouldn't work in the real world.
>Yeah, i don´t know any person who wears a chastity cage in public.
>Seriously, i don´t even know anymore where you´re trying to go with your argumentation.
I am not talking about people who wear nothing but the cage in public. I am talking about people who would admit that they are into it. Chastity is something you keep as a secret because it's a fucked up thing. You are claiming that it's vanilla, but I am pretty sure that you can pick 20 guys out of a random crowd and not a single one of them would be wearing a chastity cage.
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8b1f7a No.8395
>>8394
>Chastity is something you keep as a secret because it's a fucked up thing
And as i said before that´s true for probably every fetish out there. Think about it, why do fetishes excite us so much? Because they are linked with an inherent social stigma and taboo. That´s exactly why they are so arousing. A socially acceptable fetish is a fucking paradoxon. Name me one single fetish you can tell the public without getting weird glances from other people. And i don´t understand why you´re making such a fuss about chastity being fucked up. You´re posting on a fucking fetish board. Everything here is fucked up and outlandish.
>You are claiming that it's vanilla,
I never said it´s vanilla. I said it´s a very vanilla fetish compared to other stuff. There is a huge difference there.
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cfde9b No.8396
>>8379
>Well, that´s true for every fetish. Why footworship, when you can have sex? Why face sitting when you can have sex? Why dressing up in weird leather outfits when you can have sex? Maybe because just sex itself gets boring after a time?
First of all
>being a footfag
Okay now that that's out of the way, the difference is that all of those lead directly into sex, sometimes spontaneously. Facesitting is basically oral sex, costumes and clothes you don't get to wear outside are fun to do it in, and fuck man who DOESN'T like a foot massage once in a while? Not even being sexual here, those shits feel great. Bitches love a non-sexual foot massage. Chastity, meanwhile, is something that activity inhibits her ability to get dicked. I don't think I can stress this enough, but
Women would rather feel your penis inside of them then prevent you from giving them the dick. In her mind, her getting pleasure >>>>> her denying you pleasure.
>>8386
Speaking as someone who bought a cheap knock off lock, this. It's a nice fantasy, but logistically it just doesn't work the way you want it to. It really doesn't work as a long-term thing, and if you can't even leave it on for 24 hours then what is the point? Put it on in the morning and unlock at night? Sure, if your job is easy enough that you can perform 100% with a constant (and I mean impossible to ignore) distraction.
>>8395
>I said it´s a very vanilla fetish compared to other stuff.
Compared to what exactly? I'm willing to bet real money that most people irl think buying and wearing specialty equipment for the sole purpose of not being able to perform sexual intercourse is stranger than anal. Or most popular (read: seen in movies) forms of BDSM.
Anywho, the point is that most women will only be interested in chastity as far as "well, it's something weird but he likes it, so it's okay. I could take it or leave it."
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7384ba No.8397
>>8396
>what is the point of a form of domination
>on a domination centered board
okay
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cfde9b No.8398
>>8397
>what does it matter what a girl wants
>in a thread about what a girl wants
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7384ba No.8399
>>8398
well then you can throw out te entire idea of femdom, I guess we delete the board now
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8b1f7a No.8400
>>8396
>Women would rather feel your penis inside of them then prevent you from giving them the dick. In her mind, her getting pleasure >>>>> her denying you pleasure.
And yet again you make the completely blind and bizarre assumption that chastity is something permanent for all eternity. Chastity is supposed to be hot forplay, where the man gets teased over and over again over a day or more days until she finally allowes him to please her. Your whole point is nothing more than an extremely inflated strawman. And how the fuck do you know what every woman out there in existant wants? You seem to think that you´re some kind of all understanding womanizer and women obviously can only be into things which you yourself also happen to like.
And maybe you guys should just make peace with the fact that there are people out there who like things you don´t like. Otherwise you´´ll just get insane.
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7543e0 No.8406
>>8396
Hear hear, fetish war now! As you can see fetish wars already bring a lot of activity to this place.
Licking feet might be a bit strange to most females, but this can also lead to oral sex or normal sex. This gets very close to weirdo territory but it's possible to avoid it by not overdoing it and only focusing on her feet.
As for chastity it's obviously an inferor fetish to superior orgasm denial, you don't even need any equipment. With orgasm denial you can still have sex and please the woman, and you can stay excited for her for a week or more, while focusing on all her desires.
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8b1f7a No.8408
>>8406
>He doesn´t want to give his girl complete power over his sexuality.
>He doesn´t want to be driven insane by his caged lust while she just smiles at you sadistically
>He thinks he´s so important that a woman can only experience sexual arousal if she has his dick inside her
Pretty male centered tbh.
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7543e0 No.8410
>>8408
You don't need a cage for any of that. That's pretty object centered.
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8b1f7a No.8411
>>8410
I think it adds a lot more power to the fetish when you can´t even get hard or touch yourself anymore without her permission, even if you want to do it. Shit´s hot, yo.
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7543e0 No.8414
>>8411
But there's sissies wearing cages and cumming.
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0bf205 No.8415
>>8408
>He thinks he´s so important that a woman can only experience sexual arousal if she has his dick inside her
So you are suggesting cucking or using toys, neither of those are a good thing
>>8411
>you can´t even get hard or touch yourself anymore without her permission
Pretty obvious that you two never tried these cages in real life. You two are virgins who compare their current life to those of a couple. I doubt you would be happy if you found a gf. It's VERY obvious that you have never tried tease and denial in real life. Because that shit requires a very good partner who knows how your dick works. Because not every touch feels automatically good, and not every girl is good and giving handjobs. There are girls who will rub you the wrong way. But since you never actually experienced any of this you don't know it. In your inexperienced mind tease and denial consist of her touching you once causing you to be right on the edge of cumming. These cages don't work the way you think they would, they are just annoying.
You guys are the kind of guys who deserve to be cucked. A dominant roommate who fucks around with others but keeps you locked away. You fucking virgins would prefer that over an actual relationship anyway. Everyone who is this passionate about being dominated is a weirdo to some degree.
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8b1f7a No.8416
>>8415
>So you are suggesting cucking or using toys, neither of those are a good thing
No, i did indeed suggest nothing of that sort. You should probably work on your reading comprehension.
>You two are virgins who compare their current life to those of a couple. I doubt you would be happy if you found a gf. It's VERY obvious that you have never tried tease and denial in real life.
Whoa, watch out we have an armchair psychologist over here.
> Everyone who is this passionate about being dominated is a weirdo to some degree.
Everyone who is irrationally angry about other peoples fetishes is a weirdo to some degree.
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cfde9b No.8417
>>8411
It is a hot concept, I can't deny that. But erections are not impossible, just painful. I hope you don't care for a good night's sleep because that shit will wake you up every 2 hours. It's also 100% possible to stimulate yourself to the point of orgasm through a cage. Don't even need to use the prostate, just hump something for a few minutes.
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9de336 No.8481
>>8396
>Women would rather feel your penis inside of them then prevent you from giving them the dick. In her mind, her getting pleasure >>>>> her denying you pleasure.
LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK
IF YOUR FEMDOM IS FOCUSED ON LOWERING THE MALE RATHER THAN ELEVATING THE FEMALE, IT'S MALESUB, NOT FEMDOM
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9de336 No.8482
>>8408
>He thinks he's so important that his girl gives any kind of a fuck about his sexuality
Wow, such hubris.
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9de336 No.8483
>>8416
Other people's fetishes don't have a right to exist.
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7543e0 No.8485
>>8481
>IT'S MALESUB, NOT FEMDOM
This really made me think and HHmmmmm….. for a second. You're right. Is your submission more important than her dominance? Interesting thing to think about, lads.
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5c7506 No.8488
>>8481
Calm down. You´re scaring the children.
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6da986 No.8527
>>8168
>>8170
Yeah, interesting read but I don't see what it has to do with femdom.
>No, that's just a man's idea of how we want women to dominate us.
No shit, femdom is mainly a male fantasy.
>So what DO women want?
A lot of things.
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9de336 No.8529
>>8527
>femdom is mainly a male fantasy.
And this is the problem that we need to correct.
If your femdom isn't female-centric, it's not femdom.
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590599 No.8543
>>8529
>And this is the problem that we need to correct.
You can't fix this because women are naturally submissive. Go make a tinder profile saying that you are a submissive male and want a dominant gf and see where that get's you. No girl wants a cuck of an boyfriend
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9de336 No.8552
>>8543
Keep telling yourself these lies.
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9de336 No.8553
>>8543
>trying to find a woman to do your fetish with
This is already a mistake. Get a gf first, then tell her you're interested in femdom. That's the secret to getting a dominant gf.
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4b184c No.8563
>>8553
>Get a gf first, then tell her you're interested in femdom
>Gf loses all respect for you and dumps you telling all her friends what kind of a weirdo you are
Yeah, great strategy there buddy
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98a83a No.8565
>>8349
ah yes I do believe that is called gentle femdom, my preferred femdom where both parties enjoy what they are doing and have a nice stable relationship.
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825d7c No.8568
>>8563
>Go to a random girl in a bar
>…H..Hey do you want to step on my d..dick?
Yeah, great strategy there buddy
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