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ca4e5e No.5495
Ehi guys. Gal looking for advice here. Should I try t get my boyfriend into femdom or get a sub? We are in a 4 years long open relationship, so I know he won't be opposed to the idea. But truth is, I do really wanna mess HIM up.
I am crazy for the dude. He is everything I have been looking for. Strong, smart and confident enough to let all the macho bullshit behind. We already have a soft femdomish sort of dynamic ( ie I am the breadwinner, I decide and he supports, he followed me litterally to the other side of the world). He choose to follow, to give up control, and I fucking love it.
I would love to bring it in the bedroom, but while he is open minded, he is not kinky at all.
I tried some supersuper soft orgasm denial/control ( more a tease than anything) and he just got pissed off. We talked about pegging, and while it wasn't a complete no, he is super insecure about his backdoor. He is a bit of an exhibitionist, a cfnm afecionado, a tiny bit of a masochist (I am a biter) and definitely eager to please, but I really don't wanna force him into anything he would not enjoy.
I like them needy, horny and in distress, not just in distress thank you.
Any idea?Should I give up and get another volunteer for my games? Or give it another try?
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ca4e5e No.5496
Are you happy with him, other than the lack of femdom?
Then try again.
If you are thinking of leaving him because of the lack of bedroom fun, I think you should just lay all the cards on table, and explain how you need to get kinky. If he isnt down with it, and you need it, then I guess you two arent working out.
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ca4e5e No.5499
I would recommend having a long conversation about how that is what you ultimately love and get off on and he has to respect that and be open minded about kinks too. I believe once you start denying him he will become really needy, i've noticed this myself because when i am not allowed to cum my attitude changes.
But tbh this will be a lot to deal with and you never really know if he will join in and like it until you try and get him ready mentally.
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ca4e5e No.5500
>>5499
Without prior consent, that's manipulation and has no place in a healthy, respectful relationship.
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ca4e5e No.5502
Eya, OP here. Thanks for the honest answers, guys.
To clarify, I would never, ever do anything without consent. Or a safeword, if needed.
That' s why I am asking for advice. I don't want to unadvertedly force him or, you are right anon, manipulate him. He wants me happy and he may even get along with whatever, especially if he felt our relationship was at stake (which is not). I don't want that. I care, I protect, from the others and myself.
We are both young (under 25) and while we went to a couple of FetLife Munch and a bunch of Fetish night, I am afraid not to have the experience to properly introduce and guide him. I had some like- minded playmate in the past, but I feel that introducing a vanilla is a completely different matter. I repeat, I am not into abuse. Distress, even pain it' fine for me only if wanted. And I If you have any idea on what it could be a super duper soft non manipulative introduction it would be appreciated.
Also, I am not dumping him. That isp why, the other option, is finding a willing sub for this sort of stuff. Somebody aware that I already have a mate but still happy to share. I am confident that there will be enough volunteers ( I have seen that statistic).
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ca4e5e No.5503
Find out what kinky stuff he likes and is into it. Then try to find similarities between the two.
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ca4e5e No.5546
>>5502
A good talk is all you need to know what he would accept to receive and what he would not. What he is probably not into is you cheating. What he could be into is the use of seduction and tease outside of the bed.
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ca4e5e No.5591
>>5495
start off by gradually intorducing him into it. Farting in his face would be the best way to do this, but you have to gradually work your way up to this. Start by accidentally letting loose a fart near him, say that you have gas or some bullshit excuse. Next, tell your slave that you want to do facesitting because you find it hot or whatever. After about five minutes of boring facesitting, fart right in his face, but make it look like an accident. If you eventually keep doing this, he'll grow accustomed to it and come to like it.
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ca4e5e No.5626
yeah give up and find me.
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ca4e5e No.6293
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5fae5b No.7681
>>5591
What the hell I'm submissive and farting is the least attractive part of femdom. This is not how you introduce him to it.
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9857e1 No.7683
>>5591
That's merely a fetish of yours dude, not a particularly common one either.
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acb0cc No.7684
Gradually introduce him into the idea of it. Show, don't tell. Instead of saying that you want to do X, Y, and Z to him simply do a lighter form of it. Want to tie him up? Try gently pinning his arms down and saying something about how you enjoy this, or you wish you could tie him up. All good things take time, gauge his reactions with each movement and see if this is right for you both.
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5fca9e No.7695
>>5591
wtf, don't do this. This guy just has this one fetish for some reason.
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b80fb0 No.7706
>>5495
>We are in a 4 years long open relationship
Then you are doomed to fall apart because you are cucking him.
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9e87ef No.8123
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020fa2 No.8125
If he doesn't want it there is no helping it.
You need to look for another boyfriend or accept that you can't live your femdom dreams.
This is fairly common i think. Only in mid-relationship people realize they can't experience their desires to the fullest.
The choice is yours.
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d853ca No.8126
>>8123
>posting soy mems on /femdom/
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a94224 No.8133
>>5495
>open relationship
He's already a cuck, it doesn't get much more sub than that.
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