/doomer/ - Doomers Club★

>>12919

>>too tired for rage, too tired for anything

Fucking this. I thought it would blow over at first, now I'm wiser and see it won't stop until I'm too tired to breathe one day. Also the underwear, but more so forgetting to change for weeks. Smoking I can't get behind, it's too expensive.

>>12941

>>couldn't figure out how to be normal as an adolescent

'weird kid' phase we never outgrew gang. Who would've known I still act like the ultimately forgettable class clown just balding now

>>12918 (OP)

>a lot of these other anons posted (wearing black, from bad habits in general that lead to declined health, barely finding the will to go on)

>trying to smoke outside of the apartment - I have semi-large balcony, so I don't stink up the room even worse

>looking forward to weekend so I can get liquored up with some acquaintances (half of them is like 5-6 years younger than me) and just forget about myself and my shitty life that's only getting worse

>doesn't enjoy any hobies (vidya, drawing, music)

>trying not to think of my ex who ghosted me cause I indirectly called her a whore while drunk (all my insecurities from her attitude towards me came out, cause she dumped me and we stayed on "more than friendly" terms, but she later said she was unsure if she should go and see other people too

>scared of developing some serious ilness from these depressive, non healthy habits but still not finding the strength and motivation to change

>social anxiety when in close proximity of other people or passing them by

>feeling like getting dumber with each passing day

>feeling like having no friends only acquaintances that will eventually ghost me or see me for how much of a loser I am and maybe stay out of pity

>can't keep my power level under control and it really worries me

> mfw can't face the fact I'll eventually end up all alone when my family members die

>picture fucking related

It's all so tiresome, anons…

basically doing stuff like exercise, reading, going for walks, playing guitar, and playing vidya but knowing that is to stay away from the darkest corners of my head

but there are days that these last win, and i don't find the "motivation" (whatever that means) to do something but frying my brain with existencialist thoughts.

to mention an example, the last week i had this kind of mindfuck about how the cats and dogs that i own don't "love" me. they just stay with me because i give them food and a home to stay, and from there my brain applies the same concept to the people that surround me and the world. just mere results from cold biology and time, and nothing about that comfy fantasy of being on an important place in the universe.

in the end, the final thought about the irrelevance in this existence is what brings me some kind of peace, and from there i wait for the next crysis

>constant low-level inflammation from poor dental maintenance

>headaches all the fucking time

>dehydration

>staying in bed all day, giving up on your desktop and using a laptop because you can use it in bed

>sexual tastes are bizarre because you don't have anything to do but find new ways to jerk off

>suicidal ideation at random, not even at depressed moments of life

>those once 'great' friends are now cucked or just use you to their benefit

>ignores messages from literally everyone (has a stack of unopened messages)

>rather buy smokes over dinner

>no shave, no haircut in 3 months

>dayfags generally think you're autistic or schizo, probably both

>op is 100% right on the caffeine addiction part (pills for me personally)

>also, gets addicted to just about anything that alters brain chemistry (even the ones people think are 'non addictive')

>addicted to information

>has fb and insta, but hasn't bothered to browse or post in 3 years

>depressing ambient, tired of actual music

>wants to leave the country, but can't because lack of money and motivation

>doing graffiti during nightwalks (it's a drug in itself)

>see's that society will be fucked regardless of what party is voted in

>random people being normally 'social' with each other are just too ironic at this point

>will do dishes tomorrow, doesn't

>>12918 (OP)

Board needs more Giger

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JUD7rmHartE

>>13545

>graffiti

>not art

but it is anon

however, the real art is to find a train without security and spray the entire car in the few minutes that it stops at some place. The other aspect is to actually have a grafitti that does not look like some elementary school kid designed it. that is the real artsy part and if you do it good, the train will drive in the entire city or country and everyone will see your art / name

>>13543

I only do tags and throws, there's nothing that feels the same. Never was a whole fan of piecing, I fucks with straight letters on trains tho.

>>13545

Fags like you have been saying this shit since forever. Graffiti is the art of vandalism, it's not one or the other. Us writers almost always laugh at you people, cause you really don't know shit about graff. Some of us do it for attention, I don't. To me it's intoxicating, while drunk or on drugs too, it's even better. I just like writing shit on other people's shit. I don't, upright think I'm doing some stupid free art service to the community like most of the retards who write. I know I'm not in favor of the eyes of most people in society, I'm vandalizing people's property, and I enjoy doing it.

Do you really think that I'm going to give a shit if you think I'm some dumb nigger? On a doomer thread?? lmao

>blood stains on sheets/keyboard/common objects

KEK. I'm easily fitted on this.

>walking inside the house I shove my feet in a empty PC gabinet laying on the flor

>bleeding like a motherfucker, but I don't give a shit

>sit on the PC

>blood leaks trought the floor and taint the cellphone that was trowed around

>I don't care about cleaning it, now my white cellphone have a HUGE blood stain on the back

>weeks later, I am stopped with my uncle on a blitz, and the cops ask me why the fuck there was a blood stain on my cellphone I'm a 100% sure that if I was a nigger, I would be in jail right now because they would assume I didn't just steal it, I killed the owner

>even after that I still didn't clean my cellphone

>my uncle still mocks me because of it

>>12941

>has few acquaintances, would die for them, doubts they would do the same

Same, and that is just sad. Worst part is that I know that if the feeling was mutual I would be unconfortable, and seek distance. I'm ok with myself liking people too much, but the tought that they could feel the same towards me makes me extremelly unconfortable.

>>13564

>Fags like you have been saying this shit since forever.

Rightfully so.

>Some of us do it for attention, I don't. To me it's intoxicating, while drunk or on drugs too, it's even better.

Glad you admitted this.

>I just like writing shit on other people's shit.

Exactly as I thought, pic related.

>Do you really think that I'm going to give a shit if you think I'm some dumb nigger?

No, not at all. I'm not trying to make you care about anything, I'm not trying to stop you doing this, I just called you a nig because it's niggerlicous urbanite activity and not an art form. I'm not even one of those muh property types, I don't care. I care because I have to look at it. Calling this also art of vandalism is a bit off, it's same tier as some hobo pissing in the corner of train station, it will get washed away and life goes on.

>>12975

>Who would've known I still act like the ultimately forgettable class clown just balding now

Too close bro, too close..

>>12918 (OP)

Bloodstains got me not gonna lie

>parents not proud of you

>bed constantly has no sheets

>chronic failure

>people visibly nervous around you

>/nightwalk/

>/nightlife/

>hatred and nicotine

>alcohol

>parents house, apartment, or homeless

>constant pain, physically and mentally

>parents said you've peaked, know it's true

>life has become endless free fall

>edgy political ideology

>dead eyes

>constant fantasy life you escape to

>tfw no gf

>slowly numbing to pain

>used fullchan

>cringes in pain at 2nd image

>>13494

It stems from a mix of lifelong habit and stress, I think. It's 'cause I don't have any more nails to bite, so the hard skin on fingers/toes are next to go. I grab a knife and sometimes cut too deep, feet bleed the worst though.

>>13504

Agh the last one hit home like a fucking bus. Someone save me before I accidentally die from some failed auto-asphyxiation shit.

>>13524

Agreed. Here's to that opium-smoking wonder

>>13641

>>constant fantasy life you escape to

Half-assed worldbuilding is my only go-to anymore because I can fall asleep to the sweet idea of living in whatever I've thought up lately