/cow/ - Lolcows (Three Years on 8chan!)

Either own up to the dumb shit you did before and/or learn not to care. It's only a big deal if you react like it's a big deal. Beyond that don't use any identifiers that could be traced back to you.

Don't engage with people trying to get a rise out of you, and you are halfway there.

>>272523

The truth is fewer than 300 people are going to see any video you make before you give up because it's boring and you're too much of a timid faggot to make anything of your channel. Buck up.

>>272530

I had hundreds of thousands of views on a YouTube channel at one point. You never know.

>>272532

I can do most of that, but it would be a real fucking shame if I couldn't do in-depth rambling on the relatively obscure pieces of pop culture I also rambled about as a teenager.

(I'm on mobile now, do my ID might be different.)

>>272536

There are a ton of people who can ramble for tl;dw lengths because they like the sound of their own voice.

If anything would get you attention, it would be if your videos were to be tightly edited and got to the point.

Different guy here. Is there any excuse other than me having autism or severe mental retardation for not being able to understand cringe.

>>272996

Being over the age of 50 and wondering what all these kids are talking about when they say cringe? If so, then put your cassette of Appetite For Destruction in your Walkman, plug in your headphones and ignore what I said.

>>272536

>it would be a real fucking shame if I couldn't do in-depth rambling on the relatively obscure pieces of pop culture I also rambled about as a teenager.

And why do you think the world needs yet more videos like this? Attention-seeking is becoming more and more of a problem in general due to social media, but it's a particularly pronounced trait in lolcows.

>>272523

Anime sauce?

>>272523

>Don't give a fuck about comments on your videos except for those giving you constructive criticism (it's easy to think you have to manage your PR but youtube morons will do that for you)

>Don't step on too many toes early on, then just go all out and do whatever you want once you think you've reached enough people (because by that point someone surely knows at least the general location where you're posting videos so there's no point in trying to defend yourself anyhow

>Try to show your face as little as possible if your cocks is purely entertainment - otherwise do so as much as possible if you're explaining stuff to people, to bond with them on a subconscious level

>DO. NOT. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT MAKE APOLOGY VIDEOS OR OPINION PIECES OR TELL YOUR FANS YOU'RE SORRY ON VIDEO OR STREAM SHIT TO THEM OR ANYTHING THAT FEELS MORE PERSONAL THAN WHATEVER YOUR VIDEOS' cocks IS. You're going to either get ignored or roasted for eternity.

>Don't stick to a schedule - you'll blow it. Don't post less than a video a year either though, or no one will care about you. If you want to bounce back from a year+ long hiatus, produce a bunch of videos and upload them in a matter of days between each other.

>Most important of all, whether you're swindling kids into giving you patronbux or uploading raw version of pirated Laomite Flipbook Animation clips, remember that none of this matters in the long run and you'll just be doing it for the fun of it, or else you'll end up getting emotional about people not caring about your videos at all.

>>273025

Motherfucker the name is in the fucking image you fu

>>273121

Surprisingly OP is less of a faggot than the anon you responded to this time.

>>273121

"I cum inside my sister, and her friends too"?

>>273025

It's viral marketing, Jacob is one of the founders of FAKKU and posted those facebook screenshots himself.

If you found your laughing place, how come you're not laughing?!

>implicating the use of your own voice

I seriously hope you don't do this.

>>273110

>otherwise do so as much as possible if you're explaining stuff to people, to bond with them on a subconscious level

Ignore this faggot.^

>>272532

>for good measure, don't talk about embarrassing shit/fetishes/etc just in case you do get doxed

Don't talk about your real life experiences in general (Ben Tannehill is a good example of what not to be)

>>273003

>And why do you think the world needs yet more videos like this?

Because no one else has rambled about this particular piece of media, and I find it interesting.

>>273025

It's Oreimo.

>>273110

>>DO. NOT. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT MAKE APOLOGY VIDEOS OR OPINION PIECES OR TELL YOUR FANS YOU'RE SORRY ON VIDEO OR STREAM SHIT TO THEM OR ANYTHING THAT FEELS MORE PERSONAL THAN WHATEVER YOUR VIDEOS' cocks IS. You're going to either get ignored or roasted for eternity.

I have an interest in politics, though, and I'd like to talk about that. It's also useful to use my own experiences as an explanation for how I formed my own opinions. I also think I have some cringy childhood anecdotes that could be entertaining.. yeah, this goes completely against what you're suggesting.

>remember that none of this matters in the long run and you'll just be doing it for the fun of it, or else you'll end up getting emotional about people not caring about your videos at all.

Oh, I don't mind if my videos get ignored. I only mind if they blow up and attract the wrong kind of audience.

>>273147

Brer Fox, I said this was your laughing place! I didn't say it was mine!

>>273161

I'd use a fake voice if there weren't only three voices, or if those three voices didn't all sound like garbage. My options are limited to Fred, Neros Q, and Microsoft Sam. I'm hoping that when Adobe's "Photoshop for voice" comes out I'll have more options, but there's no target release date yet, at least not one that's been given to the public.

>>273196

I'd never talk about the embarrassing shit I do now, but I like talking about my childhood because it's at a comfortable distance where I can laugh at it and say "hey, I'm less of a dipshit now." If you think I can get doxed with it, though, I won't do it.

>>272523

As a guy who started a youtube channel just under a year ago, I'll give you advice

I was the same way, afraid of all that, afraid random people would attack my credibility, past, looks, etc etc etc

turns out you're LUCKY AS FUCK if you get over 1-200 subs your first year

and the first viewers you get sub because they know you or are genuinely interested in your cocks

the fears you have are for 5+ years down the line, assuming you don't give up

>>273196

>Ben Tannehill is a good example of what not to be

I just looked him up. I hadn't seen anything from him in ages.

https://youtu.be/q3A9wPKXOAA

This was actually pretty enjoyable.

To avoid being a lolcow you need to be at least 5'7" and that's being generous, if you are under 5'6" you are a lolcow, no exceptions, you could though, transition to female to avoid this since your body is like that of a girl.

>>276334

Or maybe we know what to look for since we've browsed /cow/ for a while.

But anyway not be coming an lolcow is trivial. Nowadays there are so many awkward people making cocks out there that it's hard to become an actual lolcow unless you stand out even from them.