>>662789
>be me
>be 15 (circa ~2013)
>read Genesis 38:9-10
>scared that God would slay me for wasting/spilling my seed during a nocturnal emission
>every night I slept with a yogurt container over my penis
>read Deuteronomy 23:10-11 some time later
>one day it finally happens
>winnie.jpg
>run out of the house as fast as I can as far away as I can
>wait the entire day until evening
>finally
>I drench myself and wash my crusty yellow yogurt cup with the garden hose
>enter the house around sunset
>dad was considering filing a missing persons report
<Anon, why did you do this?
>Because the Bible told me so!