1344f1 No.625019
I’m a young 19 year old man and for a couple of years now i’be been friendly with some girl. We texted each other a lot because of distance but we got on fine and we were pretty cool with each other.
She said she was a Catholic so I would get along with her (I’m orthodox but we agree on most things). Or so I thought.
Turns out she is what I think is a Christian-lite. She believes Jesus is her saviour but takes an extremely critical view of the church and the bible. She started saying how Paul was a sexist citing Ephesians 5:22-24 about how wives should submit to their husbands. I try to convince her that it isn’t sexist, citing how in 5:21 Paul calls for husbands and wives to submit to each other, how in 5:31 the two become one flesh and so her going on about it being “patriarchal” is wrong because it separates the two instead of joining them. She then goes on about the Catholic Church as being unfair to women about how women cannot become priests. I tell her that priests are meant to be icons for Christ and hence a woman cannot be an icon for a man and vice versa. She then goes on about how the bible is relative how it was written by sexists and slave owners, how the bible is written by men and not inspired by the Holy Spirit etc etc.
After talking to her about these things she hasn’t replied to my text at all. I fear the friendship is over even though I thought our texts were a friendly discussion and not some heated argument. Needless to say I feel pretty bad, I may have just lost a friend, yet I know that I done the right thing because I didn’t compromise my faith.
Any advice over what I should do and how I can get over this feeling of loss?
f39f5f No.625022
>inb4 misogynistic and misanthropic replies after this post
Tell her about how Theotokos Mary is the holiest person to ever exist OP, tell her how no man remotely compares to her purity.
ae237e No.625023
>>625022
>Mary is the holiest person to ever exist
f39f5f No.625024
>>625023
>son of god
Not really a fair comparison.
1344f1 No.625025
>>625022
>>625023
I said that to her when she went on about how sexist the church is. I said that Mary was the most holy human to ever live, but she told be to stop "philosophying"
ae237e No.625026
>>625024
Add "after Jesus" and it's fine
e2aa7c No.625028
>>625019
Unfortunately her mentality is all too common even among so-called "believers". Pray for her and dust your feet off.
>Any advice over what I should do and how I can get over this feeling of loss?
Enjoy the company of your brothers and sisters in Christ at your Church. Being among people who you know believe what you believe is refreshing and it reminds you that you're not insane. Fellowship always makes me feel better.
f39f5f No.625029
>>625019
And tell her how having more spiritual responsibility isn't a privilege, but rather a heavier cross to carry. Responsibility not a tool for pride, because pride is a sin. Everyone has an equal privilege of salvation, and that's the only thing that matters. There are about as many female saints as there are male ones.
>>625025
Idk what her problem is. Maybe she just had a bad day or something. Anyway you guys need to meet up face to face, that's the only way that might fix this. In this case, become a good listener, let her preach to you. Just keep asking "why" so you might find out her troubles.
>>625026
Jesus is fully God don't you see, in addition to being fully human.
>>625028
Why do you encourage OP to give up? It's a chance for him to do a virtuous work.
31d148 No.625030
Lukewarm Catholics will lukewarm…and nothing wrong with complaining with a Church so broken I'm still surprised we haven't sunk yet: too bad she complains for some wrong reasons.
1344f1 No.625032
>>625029
I tried telling her that men and women have an equal access to salvation, it's not that men are granted special privileges or anything. She may have accepted that but she went on about how women aren't allowed to be priests. I told her that priests are meant to be icons for Christ and so having a woman imitate a man would be a deprived icon, like the Mona Lisa without her smile, or Shakespeare written in modern English. She wasn't having any of it though.
1344f1 No.625033
>>625032
Cont.
I told her that although men and women have separate roles in the church that doesn't make women inferior she went on about how schools used to segregate between blacks and whites and how that was closed separate but equal. I replied that that was a false comparison but she hasn't replied since.
e2aa7c No.625034
>>625029
I didn't want to imply that he should give up on her, only that people in this state don't listen to reason (that's why she told him to stop "philosophying") so often the best thing to do is to pray for them and not let them drag you down with them.
If OP wants to reach her again I would say don't use reason, only love. Don't try to convince her of the Faith (you've already tried to do that and she rejects reason) only ask her why she is angry and don't talk about religion or philosophy or politics or anything like that. But when you ask her, have no expectations of the outcome, just try to find out why she's angry.
ec0526 No.625035
>>625025
how dare you say things you fucking patriarchal rapist
f39f5f No.625036
>>625030
Church was never perfect, from human standpoint at least.
>>625032
>>625033
Just ask what her problem is. No, no religious talk this time, just get in touch with her emotional state. And yeah, you should meet her asap.
>>625034
p much what i said
1344f1 No.625037
>>625035
I'm starting to unironically believe that she is a feminist first and a Christian second.
f39f5f No.625039
>>625037
Even an idiot would know that.
ae237e No.625040
>>625030
>I'm still surprised we haven't sunk yet
1344f1 No.625041
>>625039
She never made a point of it in the years I've know her. She never brought up any feminist tripe at all.
1344f1 No.625043
>>625036
I don't really know what to say. Should I just be blunt and ask "what's bothering you" or should I try something more subtle. I felt through the discussion that she was being really emotional (you know how emotional girls text by using ALL CAPS) and it seems to have taken offense when I had no intention to.
f39f5f No.625044
>>625041
I think you didn't know her well enough lad.
1344f1 No.625046
>>625044
Probably not Brother.
31d148 No.625047
>>625036
>Church was never perfect, from human standpoint at least.
I agree, we are all sinners…but let's be honest, as for b1968, we became the laughing stock of Christianity (especially due to how big the RCC is).
>>625040
Memes won't save the RCC.
f39f5f No.625049
>>625043
You should start the conversation with "smash the patriarchy, am i right?"
Just kidding, just ask her "hows it going?" after she gets comfortable then you like ask her whats with her angry tone in your last chat, and a "not to judge your beliefs or anything this time".
>>625047
What's b1968? The encyclical?
1344f1 No.625051
>>625049
How long should I wait? I was thinking 3 days.
ae237e No.625054
>>625047
>Memes won't save the RCC.
No need for memes when the Spirit is your guardian. This is beginning to smell like a false flag.
e2aa7c No.625055
>>625051
Do you have a thing for this girl, or are you genuinely a friend?
f39f5f No.625057
>>625051
That's okay, you know her better than me.
1344f1 No.625058
>>625055
I'm not really sure brother. A part of me would be open to her but a part of me is reserved. Especially after this discussion, she may not see pre-marital sex as a sin and she doesn't seem to understand what a Christian wife should be and due to wanting to avoid being unequally yoked I'm torn.
f39f5f No.625060
>>625058
Chastity is good brotha.
e2aa7c No.625062
>>625058
Make sure your feelings aren't clouding your judgement, otherwise you'll be led into folly with her.
1344f1 No.625063
>>625060
Exactly Brother, I'm just worried that my spirit is willing but my flesh is weak. I'm assuming you would know what it's like to be with a woman quite intimately an avoid temptation.
f39f5f No.625064
>>625063
I know a qt muslim who had hots for me back in college. Idk, I'm not very sexual to begin with I guess so I don't find such temptation really bothering me.
1344f1 No.625065
f39f5f No.625066
>>625065
We hanged out a bit, watched a movie together one day, just the two of us but nothing remarkable imo. Shame we never had a chance to talk about our faith.
3a5314 No.625067
>>625019
>She started saying how Paul was a sexist citing Ephesians 5:22-24
I kind of stopped reading here, but I went on anyway.
Sadly I then already knew she was lost.
1344f1 No.625068
>>625067
Is this just a lost cause you think?
22fee6 No.625069
>>625019
Women aren't into Christianity, except for old women and the over 30 crew which got too old for casual dating. It's a huge damn farce. I read an article a couple of days ago where a married female teacher had sex with her 13 year old student. And her Instagram description said 'Faith. Love. Family.' Truly disgusting. Only of fraction of women are proper Christians.
505b69 No.625070
That’s just part of being Christian. Get used to being lonely.
f39f5f No.625072
>>625070
But being alone doesn't mean that you don't help others.
22fee6 No.625073
>>625072
Stop wasting your own life on trying to protect people from themselves. You want to listen to Christ? He said if you enter a house and people reject you, turn away and go out. You have 0 moral obligation to waste energy on changing other people's minds.
f39f5f No.625074
>>625069
Are you sure it's a female only phenomenon?
64546e No.625075
>>625074
What, the teacher thing? Considering men get sued/punished 99 ways to sunday if they dare to have any personal interaction with a female that's not strictly work-related, yeah, I reckon it's mostly women.
9d80a5 No.625076
>>625069
Personally I will be very sure that a woman is sincere in her conversion. And if she has behaved indecently in his youth, she has to be 100% compiling with the Church, absolutely not middle grounds or transactions with this. Otherwise I do not see how a lasting relationship can be built.
22fee6 No.625077
>>625074
Women are much more hypocritical about it. Men mostly drop the entire thing, don't show up at mass, etc. When nowadays a women tells me she's Christian, I automatically assume she's a hypocrite.
22fee6 No.625079
>>625076
>And if she has behaved indecently in his youth
You think she regrets it? You think she's sorry she slept with attractive guys, got drunk with her friends and made out with attractive guys? Because she knew what the Church says about doing those things before she started doing them. What made her change her mind? You really sure she got enlightened or she just got bored/too old for it?
f39f5f No.625085
>>625073
If you're a mass preacher, that's what. For the apostles, there was no time to waste. If that's a family member or a friend you're going to see often, I don't see a good reason to abandon them.
>>625075
Not the rape thing.
>>625077
A misogynistic and misanthropic attitude as I'd expect. Do you even know a girl in real life? I'd say many of them are devout, at least where I'm from. And how do you forget the rapist priest cases that have tainted the church forever?
22fee6 No.625086
>>625085
>A misogynistic and misanthropic attitude as I'd expect.
You did not answer my question, this is just an infantile attempt to avoid it.
>I'd say many of them are devout
Oh are they? Because where I'm from, sure, when you see them singing during mass they're very devout. What happens the night before usually doesn't reflect their devoutness.
You saying those devout girls are over 20 and still virgins? Do they reject contraception? Are they at least averagely physically attractive?
>And how do you forget the rapist priest cases that have tainted the church forever?
That is not the issue here.
f39f5f No.625092
>>625086
>You did not answer my question, this is just an infantile attempt to avoid it
And you didn't make a solid claim either. It's hard to know everyone's private lives. It's, dare I say it, a biased attitude I would say. Or schizophrenic at best. I know that there are adulterous women out there, but I wouldn't say that everyone of them is adulterous.
>That is not the issue here.
That's totally the issue here. You're basing it on an incident, then I base it on incidents too. Everyone is prone to sinning. Do you think that you're better than women who sin?
22fee6 No.625095
>>625092
I asked a question. Do they regret it, why did they change their behavior? What would you bet on?
Because it's a charade, a farce. Oh I'll just live it up, despite the fact I know it's morally wrong, and change later because hey God forgives. And the best part is, men that smell something smells to high heaven about those 'conversions' of such women are insulted and demeaned.
>You're basing it on an incident
No, priest pedos are an incident because they're 1% at best of all priests. Would you say only 1% of the so called Christian girls don't follow the Christian morality?
>Do you think that you're better than women who sin?
I do what I say. If I say I won't cheat, I don't cheat. If I say I'm Christian, i'm Christian. Simple as that. You want to trust people who say they regret their behavior? Fine, do it, I'm just saying you're being made a fool of.
>oh I'm so sorry I had 2 beautiful women in my bed every weekend
>I'm sorry I had crazy nights out with my friends drunk and had loads of fun
>thingsnooneeversaid.jpg
3a5314 No.625096
>>625068
Not entirely, but don't expect much.
9d80a5 No.625100
>>625079
I also have my past, and the Lord forgives, if you are truly repentant. I also can smell bullshit from a mile because love does not blind me. I was born this way ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
1c01dc No.625105
>>625019
>Any advice over what I should do and how I can get over this feeling of loss?
Count the friendship lost. Mourn if you must, but don't regret it. Never regret anything done for Christ.
I've lost count how many potential girlfriends and good friends I've lost over Christ.
Actually, that's a lie, I remember almost every one of them by name and the wistful sighs still happen about how I could have handled it better, or explained things better.
Don't bother second-guessing yourself: the Lord is still the Lord of all things, and no soul is lost that belongs to Him.
Just focus on the fact that friends and girlfriends pass away, but the Lord is ALWAYS.
22fee6 No.625109
>>625100
>if you are truly repentant
Again, when have you heard anyone say
>oh I'm so sorry I had 2 beautiful women in my bed every weekend
>I'm sorry I had crazy nights out with my friends drunk and had loads of fun
And the reasons why they did those things can be:
1. they didn't think it was wrong anyway
2. they knew it was wrong but did it anyway because hey I'll repent
And this constant justification of sin and not mentioning the consequences of one's action is what's turning me away from Christianity at a very speedy pace. If a kid can cheat on a school test and get away with it, he will do it. The same goes for sin and all I see is people telling me how basically everyone gets away with sin.
576590 No.625111
>>625022
Matt 11:11:
>Truly, I say to you, among those born of women there has arisen no one greater than John the Baptist. Yet the one who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he.
ae15c5 No.625117
>>625023
Who is that hippie? Does he not know that long hair dishonoreth a man?
a0390e No.625188
>>625049
Sorry, typo: 1968, the year the sexual revolution hit and the Church was forever infected with modernism.
>>625054
No, I'm a Catholic bordering absolute despair.
I keep hearing people saying I follow the worst Church in the world, the greatest evil of all times, etc…other Christians I know told me that many many times, and living also in a very secular place, I am a tad lost.
0a88e0 No.625555
>>625025
> stop using evidence to contradict my emotions
Arguing with women when they're behaving like this is a complete wadte of time. I would have just stopped the conversation and talked to her when she was less emotional.
9a8748 No.625558
I don't know what to tell you except time to move on. Shake the dust off your feet.
ff76a8 No.625562
>>625188
>Christians I know told me I follow the worst Church in the world, the greatest evil of all times, etc many many times
Not Christian honestly, they've put themselves out of the Church voluntarily and will pay the ultimate price.
>and living also in a very secular place, I am a tad lost.
Who doesn't live in a very secular place? Let the Spirit bring you comfort.
31d148 No.625568
>>625562
I wish I could find a place where Catholics are in a small minority and not bothered…I don’t even like most if my own Church.
31d148 No.625569
c68075 No.625576
>>625019
>citing how in 5:21 Paul calls for husbands and wives to submit to each other
It doesn't say that. 5:21 addresses the general body of believers, but Paul then specifically tells wives to submit to their husbands, and that husbands should love their wives. There are also other parts of the epistles that make it clear that women do not hold authority over men.
I had this conversation with my wife, and she understood that it was a matter of establishing hierarchy. It works out pretty well; I thoughtfully consider her input, but I get the final say if it comes to a disagreement we cannot resolve by more diplomatic means. Fortunately, that hasn't ever really happened. We usually just agree on things or we talk them out.
Marriage should reflect the relationship between the Church and her Savior. Feminists believe that they need to dispute everything men say and do because "women need to assert themselves" - what would Jesus think if believers were that cunty toward Him?
cc9a39 No.625612
>>625555
A lot of women act like this unfortunately.
1344f1 No.626312
>>625576
She kept on going on about how she desired equality in a relationship. However I tried to explain to her that true equality cannot exist. Such as would she date a man who earned $10000 more than her? Or vice versa.
6a5759 No.626558
>>625019
Unless you are spreading the Word of God, disregard non Christian gird, especially if you are romantically interested in them.
6a5759 No.626570
I mean to say non Christian girls.
5de61a No.626587
I sorry you lost a friend to the narrative, I wish you find better friends.
>>625111
This.
3bf01e No.626647
It is patriarchal and sexist, and you're a cuck for not admitting that.