/christian/ - Christian Discussion and Fellowship

>>577856

cont.

But things were going up, quite literally everything in my life and I was starting to read my Bible again and started browsing /christian/ again. This was until yesterday when my father (yes i live with him, I will not disclose my age) found my weed. I then got struck with guilt and he accused me of things which just weren't feasible as to why I was doing it, my mother on the other hand got it spot on saying that i was just bored. Things then started to cooldown along with the guilt but I hadn’t actually cemented so to say the warnings my father said to me, as after all the way i was going about things was good until his interference, I will admit what I did was wrong. I won't justify anything, i did it within his household under his jurisdiction and I shouldn't have done that even if I did only use my own money that I had to purchase them.

>>577857

cont.

But then things were cooling and I thought to myself “why not have a cigarette” literally because I was bored. Then soon after my father catches me doing so once again and makes a handful of false accusations such as its because of the divorce and such, calling me a weak individual, but I mean from his point of view they seen feasible however since he is not me he doesn't know. But after that the guilt had hit again and I thought of this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqEDhKKPl-o and I found myself with nothing left but to sit and pray for the first time in months. I re read Ecclesiastes and sat in silence with my thoughts for a good hour.

But now, I can say that I am wholeheartedly done with everything, any form of substance use. I made a vow to myself and God that I will not do so. However I will serve the repercussions of my actions but I have no Idea how to tell him. I've lied to him one too many times and I have no Idea how to show him, I mean overnight convictions are real but I have currently no merits for him to trust. But what happened to me last night It feels like a christmas present from christ. But now, I have no idea what to do now.

I think your father is kind of right. You are not a huge degenerate because you are bored. I'm bored many times, but I don't take drugs.

There is an underlying weakness, escapism and lack of principles that really causes the drugs consumption, being "bored" is just having no distractions, allowing you to entertain tempting thoughts ("why not?"), triggering their consumption.

Guilt, prayer and God help us overcome that weakness which is the root of the problem. I think what you have to do is to remain clean, to learn to not to entertain those thoughts and to be virtuous so that your family can be proud of you.

>>577863

He thinks I was using it however because i was using it as an escape, but like I had said even my mother knows that I was just bored hence why my grades in school stayed the same or went up even with constant sleeping in class.

>>577867

But what I did was still wrong, I have no way to show my father what I know I did was wrong without him thinking its some sort of scheme, because it is sincere. I wont entertain those thoughts anymore, I mean I eventually removed pornography (which i know everybody on this board struggles with, with the constant no-fap threads) so I know how to stop things.

>>577858

Why not give him the gift of genuine gratitude? A handwritten card and reasonable gift will go a long way.

>>578028

What would I say in the card? But I mean if its from the bottom and I do mean the bottom of my heart with all sincerity do you think he will believe it. I have absolutely no clue where to even start

>>578059

Well, write out how you feel grateful. And yeah, I think he'll appreciate it.