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/christian/ - Christian Discussion and Fellowship

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
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File: 9560a15428ef91a⋯.jpg (25.67 KB, 335x334, 335:334, bible nintendo.jpg)

09ea7e No.551378

>he hasn't read this translation

d0111f No.551383

File: ac307db952fb96a⋯.jpg (38.53 KB, 231x325, 231:325, IMG_2334.JPG)

>>551378

>being a heretic

Reminder:

>"In teh beginz is teh meow, and teh meow sez "Oh hai Ceiling Cat" and teh meow iz teh Ceiling Cat. Teh meow an teh Ceiling Cat iz teh bests frenz in teh begins"

TIHS BOOK IS CEILING CAT! I HAZ NO FEARS OF MANZ


6610b9 No.551389

File: ce0643fbebb9017⋯.jpg (168.36 KB, 622x800, 311:400, vegetable-gardeners-bible-….jpg)

In the aboriginal spring the Wide-rows-Organic-methods-Raised-beds-Deep-soil was with the Gardener, and the Wide-rows-Organic-methods-Raised-beds-Deep-soil was the Gardener.


f22ffc No.551455

File: 313dd2af6db04e5⋯.jpg (18.6 KB, 264x266, 132:133, 1474856864444.jpg)

>Nintendo: KJV

>Sony: NIV

NINTENDOMINATION


2fe0fe No.551482

File: bf2a7ecac1a81e5⋯.jpg (41.17 KB, 398x499, 398:499, 51V4vynSPKL._SX396_BO1,204….jpg)

>he hasn't read this translation


87e519 No.551504

File: 19279755463f6c2⋯.jpg (38.75 KB, 325x499, 325:499, 51VDWZNR7AL._SX323_BO1,204….jpg)

File: b53f323e87f358e⋯.jpg (11.93 KB, 192x263, 192:263, download (1).jpg)

Oi 'umies, da ork boyz hav da goodest tranzlafion


0764c3 No.551586

>>551504

>Da Jesus Book

New An Diffren Kine Earth An Sky

211Den, jalike one dream, I wen see one new kine earth an one new kine sky. Cuz da first earth an da first sky wen pau, an no mo sea. 2An I see da new Jerusalem, da town dat stay spesho fo God, coming down from God in da sky, jalike one lady dat get nice dress, all ready fo meet an marry her husban. 3An I wen hear one loud voice coming from da throne dat say,

“Now God make house wit da peopo.

An he goin live wit dem.

Dey goin be his peopo,

An God goin stay dea wit dem fo real,

An be dea God.

4God goin wipe away all da tears from dea eye.

Nobody goin mahke no moa.

Nobody goin stay sore inside,

O cry, o suffa,

Cuz da way tings wen happen befo,

All dat goin pau.”

5Da One dat sit on top da throne wen say, “I stay make everyting all new.” Den he say, “Write dis down, cuz wat I say, dis true, an you can trus um.”

6Den he tell me, “Everyting pau! I everyting, from first to last, A to Z. Whoeva stay thirsty, I goin give um water fo drink from da puka fo da water dat make peopo get life fo real kine, an no need pay. 7Whoeva fight an win ova da bad kine stuff, dey goin get all dat stuff. I goin be dea God, an dey goin be my kids.”

8But da peopo dat no do notting cuz dey scared, da peopo dat no trus, dat ack pilau kine, dat kill oddas, dat fool aroun, dat make kahuna, dat go down an pray to da idol kine gods, an everybody dat bulai, dey goin go inside da sulfur lake dat stay burning. Dass wen dey mahke da second time.

Da New Kine Jerusalem Town

9Den, da seven angel messenja guys dat get seven bowl full a da seven big kine trouble dat goin come at da end a da world, one a dem angel guys wen come an tell me, “Come ova hea. I goin show you da lady dat goin be da wife fo God's Baby Sheep Guy.” 10An God's Spirit wen take charge a me, an da angel wen take me to one big an high mountain, an show me Jerusalem, da town dat stay spesho fo God, coming down from God in da sky. 11Was awesome, an wen shine cuz God stay dea. Da light from da town wen shine jalike one jewel stone dat cost plenny, jalike one diamond, an you can see thru um jalike da crystal. 12Had one big, high wall wit twelve gate, an one angel guy by each gate. On top da gates wen stay write da names fo da twelve ohana fo da Israel peopo. 13Had three gate on da east side, three gate on da nort side, three gate on da sout side, an three gate on da west side. 14Da wall fo da big town wen get twelve big kine stone block fo da foundation. On top had da names fo da twelve guys dat Jesus wen send all ova fo tell peopo bout God's Baby Sheep Guy.

15Da angel guy dat wen talk wit me get one gold kine stick fo find out how long an wide da town, da gate, an da wall. 16Da town stay jalike one square, same wide an same long. Da angel guy go measure wit da stick how big da town, an he wen find out was 1,500 mile. Get same wide, one side to da odda, an same high all aroun. 17He measure da wall, an find out was 216 feet high, jalike how da way da peopo measure um, cuz da angel guy wen measure um lidat. 18Dey make da wall from diamond, an da town from solid gold dat look jalike glass dat you can see thru.

19Da foundation fo da town get all kine jewel stones dat cost plenny all ova. Da first foundation had diamond kine stone, da second one blue kine sapphire stone, da nex one red kine agate stone, da nex one green kine emerald stone, 20da nex one white kine onyx stone, da nex one red kine carnelian stone, da nex one yellow-green kine peridot stone, da nex one blue-green kine beryl stone, da nex one yellow kine topaz stone, da nex one green kine chrysofrase stone, da nex one red-orange kine zircon stone, an da last foundation purple kine amethys stone. 21Da twelve gate, dass was twelve pearl. Every gate was one big pearl. Da streets inside da big town was solid gold dat you can see thru, jalike da glass.

22I neva see one temple inside da town, cuz da Boss dass da God Who Get All Da Power, an God's Baby Sheep Guy, dey da temple! 23Da town no need da sun o da moon fo shine on top um, cuz God stay awesome, an God's light shine on top um, an God's Baby Sheep Guy jalike da lamp. 24All da diffren peopos all ova da world goin walk aroun inside da light ova dea. Da kings from all ova da world goin bring all dea awesome stuff inside God's big town. 25Day time dey no goin eva shut da gates inside da town. An you know wat? No mo nite time dea! 26All da diffren peopos all ova da world goin bring all dea awesome stuff dat cost plenny inside God's big town. 27But da kine stuff dat make peopo so dey no can pray no can go inside da town, an da peopo dat do shame kine stuff an bulai, dey no can go inside dea. Ony da peopo dat God's Baby Sheep Guy get dea names inside his Book, Da Book Dat Tell Who Get God's Kine Life, dey can go inside God's big town.


625dcd No.551615

>>551586

>“Now God make house wit da peopo.

>An he goin live wit dem.

>Dey goin be his peopo,

>An God goin stay dea wit dem fo real,

>An be dea God.

>4God goin wipe away all da tears from dea eye.

>Nobody goin mahke no moa.

>Nobody goin stay sore inside,

>O cry, o suffa,

>Cuz da way tings wen happen befo,

>All dat goin pau.”

:")>>551586


71a662 No.551632

>>551383

How is Revelations is that book?


71a662 No.551634

File: d474b01b97ca967⋯.jpg (49.88 KB, 319x400, 319:400, 61wJHkJj0kL._AC_SY400_.jpg)

File: 539503374476641⋯.jpg (187.17 KB, 1632x1224, 4:3, 71QDZfBy5PL.jpg)

>not reading the best translation

>this version mentions the Big Bang


d2eb59 No.551635


d0111f No.551643

>>551635

Check out Ecclesiastes if you haven't


d75408 No.551659

File: 99ddc08a1c9df84⋯.jpg (86.98 KB, 1024x577, 1024:577, Minecraft-Story-Mode-Episo….jpg)

>>551634

At least we're getting a lot of comically cringe content from people trying to shamelessly profit from minecraft's 'success'.


d3fa61 No.551686

File: 2467d286c3cf491⋯.gif (4.04 KB, 336x240, 7:5, the_new_testament_bellcom_….gif)

File: 7f59a6584c500a6⋯.png (63.7 KB, 783x421, 783:421, kjv_cli.png)

>>551455 (nice digits)

>>551482

>imblying that Linux isn't KJV-only independent fundamental Baptist


edab0d No.553493

YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.

>>551378

Krispin Wah did.


bbedfd No.553499

>he doesn't have the Wonder Bible™


6e0193 No.553528


0c30ff No.553908

>>553493

Krispin Wah!? I was never into to wrestling but I always assumed it was Chris Benwah when my friends talks wrestling! For some reason this has thrown me




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