/8bantb/ -i'm a fart guy all the time anymore. i high-fiber diet causes me to constantly be blowing my ass apart all throughout the day. i bet i rip about 100 boisterous farts a day and that's no joke. they fucken smell awful, too. i mean, i like the smell, but i am

Name
Email
Subject	REC STOP
Comment *
File	Select/drop/paste files here
Password	(Randomized for file and post deletion; you may also set your own.)
Archive	Archive [500 char limit]
* = required field	[▶Show post options & limits] Confused? See the FAQ.

File: 535dca9200e095e⋯.jpg (92.41 KB,980x925,196:185,RS5221_163837122.jpg)

Nameless 05/07/20 (Thu) 01:45:43 No.5302

i'm a fart guy all the time anymore. i high-fiber diet causes me to constantly be blowing my ass apart all throughout the day. i bet i rip about 100 boisterous farts a day and that's no joke. they fucken smell awful, too. i mean, i like the smell, but i am pretty sure anyone else would try to an hero if they were locked in a room with one of these. they have tremendous staying power, too, and i am beginning to think they actually permeate surfaces. many times, i will fart in my car in my garage before getting out. if i have to go back out a few hours later, the fart will still be in the car. and, today, i farted in my car before going into the store. i was in there for a good hour. when i came out and opened my trunk to put away my groceries, the fart wafted out of my fucken trunk and i didn't even fart in there. also today at the same store, i was driving by the store front to turn down a parking aisle. it's one of those big box warehouse clubs and was crowded with people coming in an out of the store. i had to roll my windows up as i drovw through the crowd because my car was still filled with the fart i let out a minute earlier and i didn't want to destroy everyone as i drove past them with my ass gas billowing out from my car windows. everyone is already stressed enough as it is right now with this covid shit and not being able to get any lysol or meat. the last thing anyone wants thrown on top of the heap of shit they have to deal with right now is the smell of the the inside of my rotten asshole. i even have to watch where i fart in my house. i live in a townhouse where the neighbor's door is mere feet from mine. if i fart hard in the entry way, her dog barks its head off. it pisses me off because my ass is making me feel like a prisoner in my own home. i don't know what to do except for lower my fiber intake, but that's not a valid solution as i need fiber to keep my poo in one nice long tube steak formation. how the fuck can i get this under control before it renders me socially unacceptable?

____________________________

Disclaimer: this post and the subject matter and contents thereof - text, media, or otherwise - do not necessarily reflect the views of the 8kun administration.

Nameless 05/07/20 (Thu) 02:37:26 No.5303

anecdote from my life

my cousin (oldest) used to play wrestling with us (me and younger cousins).

He was really into that wrestling. He had sattelite tv where he would watch american channels and even if he did not understand english he watched it anyways. And after a few years he was very proficient in ENglish even after missing 2 years of school completely

so one day we played wrestling (we would stage the fights like on television).

he lifted me for one of those tricks. powerbumb or whatever the fuck it was called and while my ass was in his face, I had to let out a fart.

He told me he nearly died there and he was struggling to not lose his powers and let me fall down. We were not on the bed and if I fell I would have broken my neck most likely. I could have been dead today if it wasn't for him doing the right thing in that momen.

My cousin miro told me my fart smelled like rotten cherries

>how the fuck can i get this under control before it renders me socially unacceptable?

simple

stop eating healthy stuff (fruits and veggies) and eat unhealthy crap instead:

>meat

>wheat products

>rice

>patatoes

>fish

>eggs

>bacon

Disclaimer: this post and the subject matter and contents thereof - text, media, or otherwise - do not necessarily reflect the views of the 8kun administration.

Nameless 05/07/20 (Thu) 03:19:35 No.5308

>>5303

Use farting to your own advantage. You know what i mean.

Disclaimer: this post and the subject matter and contents thereof - text, media, or otherwise - do not necessarily reflect the views of the 8kun administration.