c11cb2 No.16845921[Last 50 Posts]
Now with some ideas for cover art. This doesn't just have to be writefag content, if you want to have your fanart of Corona-chan published that's fine too.
I outlined the print specifications for Intraverse Infinity on the web ring's thread, but if that needs to be posted again I'll do so.
=Thread Archives=
https://archive.md/fBMIH
https://archive.md/9cgW6
https://archive.is/ZCvWP
____________________________
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63ef40 No.16845964
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c11cb2 No.16845980
>>16845964
yes, benis to you too.
Now to figure whether most people will recognize what the cover art is supposed to depict.
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7fa9e9 No.16845994
>>16845980
>cover art
I think I do
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c11cb2 No.16846043
File: bd434ea0ca2cc0b⋯.jpg (Spoiler Image, 832.78 KB, 1328x659, 1328:659, jean-pierre-luminet-1978.jpg)
>>16845994
Yes that is roughly what I was going for.
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c11cb2 No.16846706
I'm deciding on a main font to use within the zine to give the pages a new look from the previous issues. The previous issues used Linux Biolinum O. I'll still check for contributions on the "other" thread.
I'm going for a typewriter look that monospace fonts tend to have with defined edges that aren't fancy serifs, without the spacing between characters being too large.
These are currently what I'm looking at.
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6257d1 No.16847816
>>16846706
Stop being a jew cocksucker, use British English and publish in blackletter with long s instead.
Typewriters are gay and made for "practicality" not because of the shitty ugly glyphs they have or the letter stamp looking differently shit each time you press the key.
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74e061 No.16847839
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9d2274 No.16847845
>>16847816
Don't know what Blackletter looks like but, this
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c11cb2 No.16847861
>>16847839
Here. It's still a draft, and I have 27 pages out of 32 to fill.
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6257d1 No.16847863
>>16847861
>libre
That's not even English. How about "free, as in free beer, "
>out of 32 to fill.
Is it a school project?
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c11cb2 No.16847866
>>16847861
filled.*
I can still try to pack the same amount of content in less pages.
>>16847863
>a school project on video games
I already posted these pics, in the last threads, but I'll post it again. It's just a small zine. 32 pages has always been the target page count.
The page count has to be divisible by 4 otherwise there'll be a page left intentionally blank.
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6257d1 No.16847869
>>16847861
>>16847866
I'm not a native speaker myself but I think "boarding" is written small since it's just a noun and not a name, line start or heading. Same with "freighter", "space", "bunk space"
I could also be completely wrong and look like an idiot.
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c11cb2 No.16847871
>>16847869
I use the informal capitalization to refer to in-game terminology. "Bunk space", or "bunk room" is one of the stats a ship can have.
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6257d1 No.16847875
>>16847871
Then you're being inconsistent because flagship isn't capitalised.
You could also make them italic or bold instead which would allow spotting game terms more easily since English doesn't have combined nouns without spaces or hyphens.
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c11cb2 No.16847878
>>16847875
>Then you're being inconsistent because flagship isn't capitalised.
https://www.thefreedictionary.com/flagship
Think with the actual definition of flagship, it works. It's to be made clear that the player is the captain or commander of the fleet. I think I can change Freighter to lowercase.
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6257d1 No.16847880
>>16847878
>I think I can change Freighter to lowercase.
That's what I'm saying you're being inconsistent. Is cargo space another exclusive game word? What characteristics do you use to capitalise things or do just capitalise randomly?
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c11cb2 No.16847881
>>16847880
I'd think about Cargo Space vs cargo space. The former I'd be specifically referring to the ship attribute in game. To give you an idea, I also capitalized Jump Drive.
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c11cb2 No.16849064
I just noticed this post on the old bunker, and screenshots with panty shots are fine.
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4b67d3 No.16849526
Spoonfeed all the magnets of this so I can seed them.
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c11cb2 No.16849537
>>16849526
You only need the magnet for the latest issue. You can then find magnet links for each previous issue, or various other download links, on the front and back pages.
Issue #3
b007d7afd7c45a2c31cfa4883875f08367e59153
Issue #2
9ae168297f3d52540df9b6311b20f56e275e51a5
Issue #1
0992cbad2f5087f09d34430e65feffc4b59cb2c8
Why "Their Problem" Is Your Sexuality (another anon's article)
550a973e2f942b4e26a51358200ae66c6274da19
Fallout Bible: Gospel and Acts of Anon
179c14647471bd36915ed31f20952efaec2a319b
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4b67d3 No.16849590
>>16849537
Cool. I've downloaded the torrents and updated the IPFS website.
The layout will have to be changed but thanks to IPFS that won't require redownloading the content, so I'm getting it out as quickly as possible.
/ipns/12D3KooWSbMdNpe8NgRNVp8K5aAqszpeHQQpqkwagQ9se1LMUQeA/
In case that doesn't work because propagation on IPFS is glacial, The IPNS address currently resolves to:
/ipfs/QmckTn7xC2ijzt2iMrPHN6UCa24s6U77ekEhUokefBbxqN/
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c11cb2 No.16849799
Not that much different from the previous booklet, this is the current design I'm working with. I have some amount of free space where I can fit some download links for any other anon's projects such as another zine, custom maps, mods, or /agdg/'s games. Otherwise, I'll fill it with the table of contents of the previous issue.
The download links should be as long lasting as possible with respect to how long paper can last in proper storage. Otherwise, it's not very appropriate for domains to have moved or changed within a few years.
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c11cb2 No.16850285
Currently working with this visual concept. Ideally the whole thing should be undemanding to print, but with the black hole theme and the space game, I'm might be making very obvious attempts to reduce ink usage.
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654300 No.16850774
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c11cb2 No.16851090
Now I'm happy with the way the text is arranged. It looks techy, and I think what'd be really fitting is another segment on reverse engineering and/or x86 assembly. Graphics programming and math is fine too, if there are many other anons that can write about that.
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dc0da4 No.16851134
Thanks for the good work anon, teach me your designer ways please.
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6ad49a No.16851239
If someone wants me to, I can revisit my review of Samus Returns.
>>16827793
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c11cb2 No.16851597
>>16851239
I'll be happy to publish it if you refine it for a print version. There's a few informalities that I hope won't take you a lot of effort to adapt the text for.
In spirit, I'm doing this to encourage anons to fully articulate their thoughts, so it's hard to turn down a type of long review that "felt pretty good to write".
I might have to bump the page capacity to 36 from 32 if you do revisit your review.
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27df24 No.16851602
fuck your (((graphic design))) , books deserve real art on the cover
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c11cb2 No.16851624
>>16851602
If you want to submit cover art, I'm fine with that. What I put on the cover mainly is:
>something recognizable from a distance,
>undemanding to print with regards to ink.
I'm not an actual graphic designer, nor do I have any real specialization in art, but this is something I can put together with some sense of aesthetics and knowing how to use an image editor.
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7d4e61 No.16856502
>>16851239
Please do, anon.
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c11cb2 No.16856553
I'm currently at 28 out of 32 pages, this is with images inserted, packed text, and after proofreading.
It turns out reading on a draft print instead of purely on a screen seriously helps critical self-reflection and error spotting. So I really recommend anons writing anything to do that.
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c11cb2 No.16856651
>>16856553
Also does any anon book bind as a hobby? On issue 5 or whatever, I was planning to compile each of the zines as a signature, then sew them together like a shelvable book.
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f1eab6 No.16857736
>>16856651
No but it looks interesting.
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c11cb2 No.16857820
>>16857736
I was especially considering that type of binding since the book can lay flat regardless of page count. That way, I can reuse each zine as a signature and preserve the double spread graphics.
The spine and hardcover can look very elaborate, but I'd really have to be anal about the editing of the text content.
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6ad49a No.16860158
Here we go. Shuffled some things, added an intro and tuned a whole lot of things to edit this. If someone could quickly proofread this, I'll post the entire text here. I could edit the text for LaTeX copy-pasting if you'd like, OP.
Sidenote: since I am a chemical engineering graduate, I was considering making an article about the yellowing of plastics and how this is reversed by retrobrite. Anyone interested?
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fa35bf No.16860162
Invidious embed. Click thumbnail to play. >>16860158
>Sidenote: since I am a chemical engineering graduate, I was considering making an article about the yellowing of plastics and how this is reversed by retrobrite. Anyone interested?
Sure. Have you seen some of the funkier methods of retrobriting? This video comes to mind but there's several others.
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6ad49a No.16860188
>>16860162
> Have I seen funky retrobriting methods
> implying I am not subscribed to this dude and a quite a few other channels like this
Absolutely my dude, what they all nearly have in common is heat and/or UV radiation.
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c11cb2 No.16860292
>>16860158
>If someone could quickly proofread this, I'll post the entire text here. I could edit the text for LaTeX copy-pasting if you'd like, OP.
If you're on Linux, you could try grammark for an incomplete grammar checker. It will snap up most anon's writings on prolixity and passive voice, but in some cases, it just hates certain words. If you're on Linux, the easy way to get it set-up is
sudo apt install lighttpd
cd /var/www/html/
git clone ...
and so forth.
(It's meant for articles and reports. If you're writing a short story, expect your style to get shredded.)
>since I am a chemical engineering graduate, I was considering making an article about the yellowing of plastics and how this is reversed by retrobrite. Anyone interested?
Topically, I will basically put anything in, but I wouldn't want the article to sound more like a promotion or advertisement of retrobrite (if this is a brand name, but it's turning out to be not). You can go autistic as you'd like on the chemical aspects.
RE: The articles, I might have to push that for Issue 5 or expand the article capacity of Issue 4.
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c11cb2 No.16860295
>>16860158
>I'll post the entire text here. I could edit the text for LaTeX copy-pasting if you'd like, OP.
Also plain text is entirely fine. I might apply changes between one column and two column to best fit text on available space.
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6ad49a No.16860338
>>16860292
> retrobrite is a brand
Nah, it's just the name the retro community gave a certain mixture of components to achieve brightening.
> I can go as autistic as I want
You bet!
I'll post the plaintext sometime tomorrow.
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6257d1 No.16861124
I noticed the Neocities page I made is somewhat related to the topic.
https://bastila.neocities.org/
When I invest so much time into it, maybe it would make sense to show it instead of hiding it under my ass. At least that's what I think.
Feel free to tell me what you think about it and suggest some better tags.
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05e6a1 No.16861135
>>16846706
>typewriter look
Might want to look at Helvetica fonts. They were specifically invented for typewriters.
I'm not particularly good with fonts but the one in use already seems "Helvetica" to me, but it's not a very good looking font.
You can pirate Neue Haas Grotesk, which is the best remake of the famous 1950s original of the same name and I'm fairly certain the "Text" variant is meant for print. It has the added bonus of being able to be called a "video game" font because some games use it, but given it's a recent font only the worst garbage such as nu-Hitman and Destiny 2 use it.
Or you can use Nimbus Sans L which is also a remake of that font and free, but I think it's worse than Neue.
You can also consider something with serifs, they tend to be more readable when printed from a shitty printer and that's part of the reason why they were much more popular in the typewriter/printing press days. But I don't know a good font with serifs.
If you run this wget command, you can get Neue font from a random fileserver:
wget –no-parent -nH –cut-dirs=5 -r -l2 -A '*.otf' http://flashedu.rai.it/ieduportale/temp/GRAFICHE~1/__Utilities/Fonts/
Proxy through tor or something if you don't want them to know your IPee.
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6257d1 No.16861182
>>16861135
Hey don't use Terry for this.
Remember how Terry liked churches because of the effort they put in?
This is kind of the opposite.
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05e6a1 No.16861203
>>16861182
Are you alright there bro?
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6257d1 No.16861226
>>16861203
Just don't be a jew.
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000000 No.16861239
>>16846706
>I'm going for a typewriter look that monospace fonts tend to have with defined edges that aren't fancy serifs,
>wants typewriter look
<san serif fonts
What the fuck are you doing?
I suggest you go look at some printed material, like a newspaper or 1900s texts and advertisements, and then come back.
>without the spacing between characters being too large.
Adjust kerning in your program. It's the spaces between the letters.
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c11cb2 No.16861513
>>16861239
>>wants typewriter look [that monospace fonts tend to have]
><san serif fonts
>What the fuck are you doing?
Comparing the default spacing between sans serif fonts and the monospace fonts I picked out since it's Font Manager's comparison view. But as you can see in a sample page, I picked a font here. >>16849799
>>16861135
>You can pirate Neue Haas Grotesk,
I was mainly going with FOSS fonts.
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05e6a1 No.16861550
>>16861239
Both serif and sans serif fonts were used on typewriters, shitdick.
The main reason serif fonts seem antiquated is because their unnecessary strokes make for poor screen fonts so no OS defaults to one.
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6257d1 No.16862634
>>16861124
One of you niggers could have told me that the long s gets removed by google fonts and that I'm only seeing it because I have the font installed.
I fixed it now.
I just had 3 undecipherable captchas in a row. Somebody fix this shit.
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4a771d No.16862642
Can I use this thread to throw out some ideas I have for starwars?
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6257d1 No.16862644
>>16862642
There's barely anyone here either way.
Just type it out and click reply.
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5821e2 No.16862657
>>16862644 (checked)
In the aftermath of a decades long war. The Jedi are dispatched to the region to bring relief and stability. The Jedi knight Lenissa is one of the many Jedi sent to this war torn world.
An ambitious Jedi, Lenissa wants to use this mission to help her advance her career. She hopes this would be the springboard that catapults her into masterhood and one day give her a seat on the council.
She questions the natives to find dangerous missions to take on in an effort to boost her prestige, one day she is told in the abandoned city of Vanu dun their is a monster that feasts on the flesh of fallen soldier and attacks any trespassers it catches.
Believing this to be a sign Lenissa departs the next day, in the abandoned city she finds signs of looting but no signs of rumored monster.
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85205e No.16862688
>>16862657
Undeterred she combs the region in search of clues but ultimately finds nothing. As she ponders her next move her supplies are stolen. Catching a glimpse of the thief she follows in pursuit.
Once she catches up she discovers a boy no more than 7 years old. She deduces that the child is a war orphan who has survived so far by scrounging the region for corpses and looting their food rations.
Now at the wars end their are fewer soldiers left to loot for food and the boy has gotten so desperate he has begun to attack travelers.
Lenissa decides to capture the boy and then drop him off at one of the many shelters that the republic has been slowly opening up.
As she prepares to grab him the boy uses the force repel her away. With her decades long experience she is able to narrowly avoid being blown off her feet, Realizing the boy is force sensitive, her plans begin to change, instead of dumping him off in the local orphanage she decides to adopt him as a youngling. But in her heart she isn’t doing this for altruistic rather she decides to use him as another stepping stone to become a Jedi master.
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c11cb2 No.16862691
>>16862657
>>16862642
If you want, I'll publish fanfiction like I did for Issue 3. Though I'm 99.99% sure an anime company isn't going to care as much as Disney, so I'm not 100% sure what trouble I or the seeds could get in.
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49bc04 No.16862728
>>16862688
This will be a carefully planned pr stunt, an abandoned orphan with nowhere to go adopted by a heart broken Jedi who will slowly rehabilitate him back into society.
with his aptitude in the force she is sure in the preceding decades she will be able to train him into being a Jedi knight in record speed.
She slowly explains her plans to induct him into the Jedi order. But this must be a choice he chooses for himself. With some fear mongering she explains that he has committed a crime many would not be able to forgive him. But if he chooses to leave with her, he would never again be forced to scavenge corpses for food, never again will he sleep in the crumbling ruins with one eye open.
He readily agrees and the next day they both leave the deteriorating planet behind. In the following years both Jedi and youngling form an emotional bond. The boy sees Linassa as the mother he never had and Linassa sees him as a son.
Until one day as Linassa is a hairs breadth away from being a Jedi Master, she lets slip to her graduating padawan that this was her plan to get her a council seat.
This revelation is so profound it shatters the new Jedi Knights faith in both the Jedi order and his master.
The story will detail the tragedies that befall both due to these events which ultimately culminate with both of them dead.
I have more ideas but it’s lunch and my ideas aren’t really structured.
>>16862691
I’m just throwing ideas out because I’m bored, If I give you something to publish rest assured it would be something original with no copyright attachments to get you sued.
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c11cb2 No.16863310
>>16862634
I don't know what you're talking about. The website looked normal to me when I clicked it.
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6257d1 No.16863331
>>16863310
Yeah now. But before it had a missing ſ in the German font and fell back to an italic latin ſ sticking out like a sore thumb unless the font is also installed on your system.
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c11cb2 No.16864698
Noting on progress— the colors are just inverted by the reader so its easier the eyes, but will be white background by default for print. I crammed the text and images of the document to fit within 32 pages, and what's left is typo and error checks.
If any anon is still writing something, I can queue it for issue 5. Since the target medium is print and torrents aren't editable, I'd like the texts to have as much time as needed to be errorless as possible.
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6ad49a No.16864804
Metroid 2: Samus Returns
https://pastebin.com/V32siaLk
V2
I am still trying to think of a witty title, but the current title will do as well.
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c11cb2 No.16864830
>>16864804
I'm going to proofread this, but one thing:
>If you enjoyed this review, let me know in the magazine or Metroid threads. Since I am quite experienced with Metroidvanias and Metroid in particular, I would be very willing to take up requests for other games, or other titles in the series.
This is a both a torrent and a printed (maga)zine. It can wind up anywhere as long as there's an anon with a file copy and a printer.
For example, if anon gives a physical copy to one of his family / friends / coworkers / collegues / random neighbor kid, then already, you may have reached the arbitrary normalfag as a potential reader. You can still write author's notes that address the reader, but contacting your readers outside of /v/ for feedback is separate problem.
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6ad49a No.16865302
>>16864830
I see. It was more of a line towards 8chan in general, to anons in these threads. You can scrap it, if that suits the magazine more.
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c11cb2 No.16865570
>>16865302
>>16864804
Giving it a partial read, your article reads like a YouTube script, which is fine except pure text content in a magazine can't have video and audio to supplement the detail of your script. You can add screenshots or photos of the game as played on your DS, but the text still has some issues.
The first 10 paragraphs you use words like "pretty" or "little" to express granularity, which I think is fine for subjectivity but isn't for quantifiable characteristics. (If you're having a little fun, I and others can relate.) The readers don't have footage of Samus getting hit and the health bar shaking, so when you say "pretty hard", they won't know if you meant 20% or taking out half of Samus' health. If you just say, "they hit hard" then the readers don't have to care about granularity.
I'll work through the rest of this later, but here are some of the errors I spot. If I'm editing out your style too much, you can still argue with me.
>Late 1991, early 1992. The Gameboy that had released two years earlier was in full swing, first to third parties developing games after hits like Tetris, Mario Land, Wario land and Link’s Awakening.
From what I get here, you are referring to a span of time. "Late 1991, early 1992" are dependent clauses. If this was creative writing, I'd be more lax on bending grammar rules for specific effects, but I'm considering this as an article. I'm also going to assume the formal use of "after" to refer to the time after said games were released, and not slang "after" as in "in imitation of".
>In the late 1991 to early 1992, the Gameboy that had released two years earlier was in full swing. First to third parties were developing games after hits like Tetris, Mario Land, Wario land and Link’s Awakening.
>So, after the relative success of Metroid …
The "So" is extraneous.
>Thus, a sequel for the Metroid series was born (and) named Metroid 2: Return of Samus (RoS).
Semi-colons connect two independent clauses. Is this a sequel within the Metroid series (sequel to a game) or sequel of the series itself?
>Currently a hybrid console/portable series with many titles on many systems (except for the Nintendo 64, which had originally inspired the idea for a first-person Metroid game.
This parenthesis isn't closed and is one of the parts I was getting the idea you're trying to condense a lot of information in a few words. It's also an incomplete sentence.
>The game was launched in late 1991 in USA regions and was only released later, early 1992 in PAL and Japan.
I'm not sure how Nintendo does their game releases, but I've thought USA was one region.
The game launched in late 1991 in USA and was only released later, early 1992 in PAL and Japan.
>Some will call this game dated,
>and aged,
>just like the console,
>but some have a love for it that often hangs together with the appreciation of just what was possible on these low-level systems.
There shouldn't be a comma between "dated" and "aged".
>Some will call this game dated and aged,
>just like the console,
This lastmost segment might be wordy.
>but some have a love that often hangs together with the appreciation of just what was possible on low-level systems.
I'm not sure if low-level system was a term formalized by the retro community. Low-level when applied to computing strikes me as abstraction from hardware which is weird when referring to the hardware itself.
My feedback regarding the first paragraph is that after reading it, I don't have a clear idea of the game itself. You give a brief history and mention other subjects such as the Gameboy and other hit games around the time period. You also do this for the next two paragraphs, and I think it starts to muddle the purpose of the article.
I get that assessing the remake also entails how faithful the remake is, but you're giving a brief overview and history of the series instead of direct comparisons. The latter, I'd think, belongs in the meat of the article and not an introduction.
>Fast forwarding to 2004: a remake for the original Metroid for the NES was created for the grandson of the Gameboy.
Comma since "fast fowarding to 2004" is a dependent clause.
>Fast forwarding to 2004, a remake for the original Metroid for the NES was created for the grandson of the Gameboy.
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c11cb2 No.16865573
>>16865570
>Sometimes, remakes are screwed up in the worst way possible. However, this was not one of those days.
When I read this sentence, the use of the word days was jarring mainly because you use sometimes and then use a specific unit of time afterwards.
>Sometimes, remakes are screwed up in the worst way possible; however, this was not the case.
>The original game,
>entirely redecorated with beautiful spritework and enhanced gameplay
>– lest not forget the amazing albeit somewhat low-fidelity music and extended areas.
This sentence is incomplete.
>The original game was entirely redecorated …
>Metroid 1 was reborn, and is for many newer players the go-to choice for playing the original.
>Metroid 1 was reborn and is, for many newer players, the go-to choice for playing the original.
The change is applied to the comma because ", and" connects two independent clauses. "for many newer players" is supplemental.
>A remake truly, in every sense of the word.
This is an incomplete sentence, but you move this to a caption of a screenshot, I'd be fine with it.
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c11cb2 No.16865582
I'm running a local instance of grammark and here's what it dislikes.
>>16865573
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c11cb2 No.16865585
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6ad49a No.16865591
>>16865573
>>16865570
>>16865582
>>16865585
Oh shit, I'll take a look at this around Sunday! Thanks! English is not my first language, but funny that the bot showed acceptable academic language.
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47e7cd No.16865599
>>16865591
Just do "replace all" for "the factum that" with "that" and the text will read a lot better.
A lot of those marked things are totally okay but I think you could vary some words. that, which; a lot of, many
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47e7cd No.16865603
I think the anglo sphere is overusing the word fact in general. When possible one should refrain from it and use case, truth or other words to describe the same in a more precise germanic manner.
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c11cb2 No.16865604
>>16865591
I don't have a goal of adhering to academic style. It did catch things it hates, except because of all the words you wrote, the things it hates totals to less than 1% of the words in the article.
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c11cb2 No.16866222
>>16865573
>Again; fast forward to approximately 2006. Fans have been pleased with Metroid Prime 2, Prime Hunters and the arcade game Prime Pinball.
Both "again" and "fast forward" are dependent clauses. The first sentence of this paragraph is incomplete.
>Fast forward to approximately 2006, fans have been pleased with Metroid Prime 2, Prime Hunters, and the arcade game Prime Pinball.
You start a sentence with "yet" twice in this paragraph. It's not invalid, but starting a sentence with a conjunction should generally be avoided.
>With no known knowledge of video game development – just digital music creation – decided that he would take this task up himself.
1. the word choice for "known knowledge"— you might want "prior knowledge" instead.
2. you are missing a subject in the clause after your dashes.
>With no known knowledge of video game development – just digital music creation – (he) decided that he would take this task up himself.
>After many years of development, the first demos would see their light of day, and the game, called AM2R (A lesser known fact: the name AM2R – which stands for Another Metroid 2 Remake – was chosen because of the fact that there was already another game in development that was called Metroid 2 Remake) was officially released on August 6th, 2016; the 30th birthday of the Metroid series.
Ok wew. This is one big sentence. You included a full sentence in your parenthesis before you finished your clause. You should break this apart so your writing involves less logical jumps.
>After many years of development, the first demos would see their light of day, and the game, called AM2R was officially released on August 6th, 2016; the 30th birthday of the Metroid series.
The semi-colon should be changed into a comma.
>After many years of development, the first demos would see their light of day. The game, called AM2R, was officially released on August 6th, 2016, the 30th birthday of the Metroid series.
>(A lesser known fact: the name AM2R – which stands for Another Metroid 2 Remake – was chosen because of the fact that there was already another game in development that was called Metroid 2 Remake.)
>After a quick takedown of the game by Nintendo, the game was legally wiped from the internet.
The internet and the web are often conflated. Do you mean the game was taken down from the web, or did Nintendo issue takedowns for FTP, and so forth?
>However, up until this day, the game still receives fan updates and is still distributed widely.
>A little less than a year later, a remake of Metroid 2 was announced for the Nintendo 3DS, by Nintendo themselves, the game development was outsourced to MercurySteam (MS) in Spain.
I think your writing would benefit more if you specified the actual time. You also made a comma splice (a type of run-on sentence that joins independent clauses).
>Less than a year later, a remake of Metroid 2 was announced for the Nintendo 3DS by Nintendo themselves. The game development was outsourced to MercurySteam (MS) in Spain.
>I played this game in 2019, after the rage for the game had died down and all major talk about it had calmed.
What you mean by "rage" is starting to get ambiguous because of the casual style. Do you mean "hype", such as marketing and so forth building up to the game's release or "anger", from the fanbase in that a fan remake was taken down?
>Nearly exclusively for this game, I had purchased a broken 3DS that I was able to fix for cheap so I could softmod it to play everything I wanted on it.
"Nearly exclusively" as a preposition isn't making much sense.
>Highly recommended, high level of customizability, many games to play with backwards compatibility and many emulators to choose from.
This is an incomplete sentence.
>I chose normal mode, finished the game in 11:15 or something and reached an item completion of 78%. Spoilers ahead.
>I chose normal mode, finished the game in 11:15 or something, and reached an item completion of 78%. Spoilers ahead.
If you are uncertain about the time it took you to complete the game, you should say you finished the game in roughly such and such time. I put a comma between "something" and "and reached" to disambiguate items of the list.
Ok again. In your review of the game, you start talking about the game itself after five paragraphs. The history of Metroid development and fan remakes are likely best as an entirely different article.
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c11cb2 No.16866463
>That was weird, to sum it up. It has a Metroid title, it has Samus, the Metroids, the upgrades, but it didn’t play like Metroid. I think I am gonna divide this up in the visuals, some notes, controls, music and then I will start to venture off into the game, following the sequence of events. I am trying to write this as a stand-alone game, and not as the third game in the trilogy RoS-AM2R-SR; a review and comparison which I am also planning to make someday.
>I will start off with the visuals. The 3D backgrounds were actually pretty nice, sometimes a bit distracting but they were never boring. The foreground and the enemies were also modelled very well, the attacks of the enemies had weight and looked pretty good. Samus’ model is sufficient, to say the least. MS drew heavy inspiration from Super Metroid (SM), which combined with the Prime suit, works pretty well. The difficulty of the game was actually pretty good, since you cannot tank a lot of hits from the bosses, and you need to adapt to the enemies and learn their patterns, like Zero Mission/Fusion and the opposite of SM.
These two segments are when you start talking about the game you're reviewing (five paragraphs in).
My problem with the first paragraph is that it depends on a previous impression of Metroid which your readers may not have, so your writing doesn't stand as independently as it could. Samus is iconic and widely recognized, but that doesn't mean other aspects of the game are.
You can introduce the release date, the original system(s), the ported system, the developer(s) behind Metroid 2: Samus Returns, and the genre in a few sentence in one paragraph as opposed to five. Even though story in video games don't matter, it's a basic hook to give your readers context of what goes on in the game.
My problem with the second paragraph is that its entirely a statement of opinion when remarking visual detail in pure text content. You can be more objective such as stating the original game's backgrounds were 2D then 3D in the remake; however, saying they're "pretty nice" or "modelled well" doesn't give the readers detail. If you don't intend to provide screenshots or photos, I think your review should prioritize and focus on aspects of the game other than graphics. You'll run into this problem again with music because paper can not embed music, unless you want to reproduce the notes and analyze composition. (That would likely warrant its own article.)
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c11cb2 No.16878797
As an update, it's almost ready, but it uses more ink than I expected (space game screenshot). I'm going to adjust the screenshots, then it should be good to go.
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6ad49a No.16879054
Samus Returns anon here, last week was way more busier than I expected so I'll need some more time to check everything; if you cross a deadline just postpone it until next time
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c11cb2 No.16879239
>>16879054
>Samus Returns anon here, last week was way more busier than I expected so I'll need some more time to check everything; if you cross a deadline just postpone it until next time
Most anons even after they check everything still have a few stray errors. Not because I doubt their language proficiency but because of editing standards for a print format, and the quantity of words they have to check over. If you want me to check over v2.1 of your review, I can help you out with that.
As for deadlines, I'm deciding against being strictly adherent to one since (1) I'm not running a subscription model, (2) everyone's who's interested can see the thread bump. If text has the time to be 100% free of errors, I'll take that over more frequent releases + some errors.
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c11cb2 No.16885666
I never saw myself as going down the Path of the Grammar Nazi. Since the medium is print, I have to be worse than /a/'s Hoihoi when it comes to spelling errors and grammars.
While editing, I have made a checklist to go through based on the most common types of errors anons make in their drafts. Some errors are obvious as casual or improper English. Others make me question if chatroom, web, and shitposting have truly atrophied my language skills.
>check for duplicate words like "the the", "is is" (general editing mishap)
>consistent spelling for transliterated Japanese names that anons have set their spell checkers to ignore
>check lead vs led
>check "there's" vs "there are"
Because "There's loads of" or "There's (plural)" is more common verbally than "There are …" or "There're".
>check for extraneous "these"
>check for punctuation of conjuctive adverb
accordingly
again
also
as a result
besides
consequently
finally
for example
further
furthermore
hence
however
in addition
indeed
in fact
in particular
instead
likewise
meanwhile
moreover
namely
nevertheless
of course
otherwise
still
that is
then
therefore
thus
>check for comma splices (run-on sentences where commas join independent clauses)
>comma placement for 'but'
>usage and punctuation of 'so', 'since', 'while' as meaning can change depending on comma placement.
>', so ' = therefore - indicates result
>'so' = so that - indicates intent
>The coronavirus was confirmed to be in the area, so every restaurant is closed.
>I went to the store so I could buy tomatos.
Issue 4 is coming around later today or Sunday.
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c11cb2 No.16886543
>>16885666
Article line-up:
- original short fiction
- game review
- custom map development commentary
- freeform article (kind of a strategy guide)
- LN review
- another free form article (gamehacking / reverse engineering)
The total word count for this issue is roughly 10,317 when previous issues contained around 8,500 words. There's less images that bump through pages, but there is one space game screenshot. I've done what I can to reduce it's ink cost without making it look terrible on screen.
web seed: https://u.teknik.io/7J1Yh.zip
infohash: bb0969adee19d87e56dfb35b20337deb05fe4251
sample trackers:
udp://tracker.coppersurfer.tk:6969/announce
udp://tracker.opentrackr.org:1337
full magnet link:
magnet:?xt=urn:btih:bb0969adee19d87e56dfb35b20337deb05fe4251&dn=intraverse04.zip&tr=udp%3a%2f%2ftracker.cyberia.is%3a6969%2fannounce&tr=udp%3a%2f%2ftracker.coppersurfer.tk%3a6969%2fannounce&ws=https%3a%2f%2fu.teknik.io%2f7J1Yh.zip
Here's a faggy quote of encouragement I've found, while editing, for anons.
>Writing is a form of personal freedom. It frees us from the mass identity we
>see in the making all around us. In the end, writers will write not to be
>outlaw heroes of some underculture but mainly to save themselves, to survive
>as individuals.
>― Don DeLillo
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4c9071 No.16886603
>>16886543
>makes grammar nazi post
>proceeds to use "it's" wrong
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c11cb2 No.16886607
>>16886603
Well, I'm ordinarily not, but I have to for this case.
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23b679 No.16886609
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c11cb2 No.16886611
>>16886609
What argument? Considering this thread is about publishing, I'd happily accept readers pointing out errors.
Solo and duo editing editing is difficult, and you do reach a point where you feel like you're searching for things that aren't there.
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c11cb2 No.16886831
>read through again after making torrent
>spot two errors
Reading some article about editing
>If your book is 30,000 words, and the words have an average of five characters each, that’s 150,000 individual characters. If your editing team ensures that 99.99% of the characters are correct, that leaves 1,500 that might be off.
>Now, if an editor goes through your book three times over the course of an edit:
>In the first read through they’ll catch 80% of the issues (meaning 20% of your errors will remain),
>In the second read through they’ll catch 80% of the remaining 20% of issues (80% of 20% is 16%, so 4% of your original errors will remain), and
>In the third read through they will catch 80% of the remaining 4% of errors.
>80% of 4% is 3.2%, which means 0.8% of your initial errors will still make it into the edited manuscript.
I don't feel as bad as having a few errors slip through, but I think I should change the release method.
>new issue gets regular file upload
>next new issue gets torrent and magnet link
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c11cb2 No.16886833
>>16886831
>next new issue gets torrent and magnet link
of the previous on the back page.*
Since I'm no longer making CMYK versions of the .pdf, it should be easier to fit files within the size limit.
(This one is the print version.)
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c11cb2 No.16891598
Just as an indication of activity: I've been pent up in my own home being as creative as I like as I no longer have to go outside. Instead, there is a general order, where I am, to stay inside.
While I don't have cover art ready for Issue 5, I'm looking at the public domain 3D render of the coronavirus that every health article seems to be using. I didn't plan to have the zine themed on the coronavirus, but seeing as I'm playing Plague Inc as anon has shared and writing down what I think about it. It might consist a significant portion of the zine. It might have the same kind of appeal as reading what ordinary people journaled about during the Black Plague, except the Black Plague was obviously more lethal than COVID-19 now and not even a 12th century harlot would think about licking an outhouse seat as a part of the #blackplaguechallenge.
If you're thinking about writing about something other than COVID-19, that's fine. Or if you don't want your article included in a COVID-19 themed zine, I'll still help with proofreading.
Here are some of my crappy, observational notes throughout the ordeal that I may use in an article since I don't have powers of omniscience.
USA Today - Coronavirus: Flu is deadlier, more widespread than Wuhan, China
Megan Henry and Grace Hauck
Published 1:00 p.m. ET Feb. 1, 2020; Updated 8:03 p.m. ET Feb. 1, 2020
https://archive.vn/j1xfs
Science Alert - The Flu Is a Way Bigger Threat to Most People in The US Than Coronavirus. Here's Why
AYLIN WOODWARD, BUSINESS INSIDER
25 JANUARY 2020
https://archive.vn/iN5Dh
NPR - Worried About Catching The New Coronavirus? In The U.S., Flu Is A Bigger Threat
Allison Aubrey
January 29, 2020·4:37 PM ET
https://archive.vn/8TVef
The Hill - Coronavirus is spreading–but the flu is a greater threat to Americans
At least 8,200 people have died from the flu in the United States this season, including 54 children.
Joseph Guzman
Published on Jan 27, 2020
http://archive.is/5qXj1
Washington Post - Get a grippe, America. The flu is a much bigger threat than coronavirus, for now.
By
Lenny Bernstein
Feb. 1, 2020 at 1:00 p.m. UTC
http://archive.vn/I2Qrw
By March 26, most states in the country ordered "shelter-in-place" though we could still go out to buy groceries and supplies. Notoriously, for the past month, there's been an extreme toilet paper shortage and panic buying. It seems there's two different interpretations. Additionally, a "Coronavirus Party" was held in defiance of state-wide social distancing orders.
NPR - Kentucky Has 39 New Cases; 1 Person Attended A 'Coronavirus Party'
March 25, 2020·5:01 AM ET
http://archive.is/W9owS
ProPublica - A Medical Worker Describes Terrifying Lung Failure From COVID-19 — Even in His Young Patients
by Lizzie Presser, March 21, 5 a.m. EDT
http://archive.today/PpqyU
"Before this, we were all joking. It’s grim humor. If you are exposed to the virus and test positive and go on quarantine, you get paid. We were all joking: I want to get the coronavirus because then I get a paid vacation from work. And once I saw these patients with it, I was like, Holy shit, I do not want to catch this and I don’t want anyone I know to catch this."
Oh, this one is just disgusting.
METRO - Attention seeker who licked toilet seat and joked about getting coronavirus now has coronavirus
Jacob GeanousWednesday; 25 Mar 2020 1:39 pm
https://archive.is/v3Hny
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b3a52c No.16891646
>>16846706
>>16861135
>>typewriter look
https://github.com/ctrlcctrlv/TT2020
>cripplekike
You take 5 minutes off his life any time you can use one of his creations against his ideology.
Don't like jews?
Write a message using QuaeriteRegnumDei.
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c11cb2 No.16891655
>>16891646
Issue 5 will be visually distinct. So I won't be using the same typewriter/monospace look as in issue 4. Also I also release a PDF where you can read the fonts is using. I much rather use a font and acknowledge a font creator that didn't pull a 180 on the community.
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6a5ed6 No.16891660
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b5d308 No.16892173
>>16891646
It might have to be said, but people like Hotwheels likely don't have real ideology. You can see a similar type of behavioral pattern in (psycho/socio-)paths, narcissists, or other kinds of personality disorders. There'll be some combination of having a massive ego, seeing oneself as special, the rules not applying to them, wanting to quickly make acquaintances or friends, throwing people under a bus when things get bad.
You'll also see this in on Tumblr and SJWs. They don't actually care about social justice, hence they're content to overlook #NYS and continue with their narrative about straight, white men. They don't have any guilt when they lie, and they'll happily use their significant others to play rape victim to get new patreon bucks flowing in. They mainly care about the notoriety that social justice nets them. When that is no longer working out for them, they'll join another dominant ideology and may just screw other another movement with good intentions, community, and so forth into some pro-dystopian cult shitshow.
For example, HW becomes a mega-Christian and a furry because those communities are easy to join and result in acquainting with a large number of people (physical church, large internet community). He "switched sides" on most principles that anons would align with only to quickly gain that group as an audience.
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094185 No.16892241
I was just thinking about starting my own zine, will be taking notes. Thanks anon.
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c11cb2 No.16893729
>>16892241
Good luck and have fun with it. I'll be happy to read it when you're done.
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e36e07 No.16894010
>>16892173
>You can see a similar type of behavioral pattern in (psycho/socio-)paths, narcissists, or other kinds of personality disorders.
Cluster B Personality Disorder.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cluster_B_personality_disorders
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