>>15378
>>15377
thanks!
>>15383
yeah well, being a virgin is really… Boring. I feel like God wants me to stay that way and I don't like him for that. Christianity puts virginity on pedestal, but in my experience it's just very lonely, sad, boring "life"
I used to pray a lot - I mean A LOT - and trust me, it doesn't help me at all. In my experience it helps only in a short run, which is worse than nothing, as it gives you an illusion of "being in control". And what really makes a difference is being honest about why you do it.. Well I want a girl-friend, I mean I want a lover and a friend in one, thats all. If I continue fapping and watching porn it is not going to happen, that much I am pretty much aware of.
>>15385
Yeah I am, I had some experiences, but not a full sex. It sucks. I often feel like it's something in my genes, some kind of autism when it comes to girls, I just don't control it, I all always end up being alone.
I'm not sexy, I hope it will change as I do nofap. If that doesn't help, it means I am doomed.
Well, anyway… Thanks for all the feedback, I wasn't expecting any responses as I only have begun.
As for my journal… Here it goes…
>Day 2
>Huge mood swings, I am a fag after all. I am not manly, I am constantly over-thinking and I am prone to negative thinking, that I never get a girlfriend as I am too much of a fag etc.
>Pretty mich full of self-hate, but at least I know that I must laugh even if it all feels meaningless, as I know from experience that being depressed for too long always leads to relapse….
>I'm creep and can't change it.
Anyway, wish me luck! And good luck to all of you