/monster/ - The Last Bastion of Romance

It really depends on how precise shoggoths can shapeshift. If she is capable of looking mostly like a human woman at least from the top half up, things are fine so long as she wears a long dress. If she can't, well, islam's coming to canada anyways.

>>320798

She is quite pale, and is sorta dead looking with an odd hair color. Overall, though she may get some odd looks, she could pass for a shut-in who doesn't get any sun. It'll be a bit more difficult if she smells like a corpse and has no pulse though.

I could see her wearing her tail like a feather boa or a fluffy sacrf, and her cute bird feet look kinda like designer heels. her wrist feathers could be passed as cuff links (and could be trimmed down and covered with sleeves if it was really necessary) and while her ears already look close to hair, they could also be concealed by a large hat

>>320805

>Leaf prefers the inferior maid

How appropriate

>>320807

>shoggoths

>inferior

>>320798

I'd have to tell people she has a medical condition that makes her have oversized hands & feet. The flowers and earthy smell are because she likes gardening? I'd have to hide her ears tho.

>>320798

not very, but her behavior might be a problem

The ears and horns would be easy enough; just wear a big (enough) hat. Hiding her tail by wrapping it around herself (either under her shirt or a jacket) would work as well. The biggest issue would be her hooved feet. I'd probably have to cart her around in a wheelchair with a blanket covering her legs to hide them.

She could wear a hat to hide her ears, gloves and high boots to hide her claws, a scarf to hide her mane and wrap her tail around her chest underneath her clothes. I suppose the only problem would be her wings.

>>320824

Sir, it has been well documented that you have been seen accompanying an alien life form in the area around your home. Please allow us inside your household to reclaim the extraterrestrial.

Hide?

Guess we'll have to move out to the ass end of nowhere if she wants to be able to walk around outside.

>>320841

最骇人妖怪，一中国女!

>>320843

Rude. She's a good girl and the kindest youkai in Gensokyo.

Mine wouldn't be too hard, she could wear a hat to hide her ears and she can wrap her tails around her legs and wear a long skirt. The only thing that might be a problem is her adorable canine fangs if she smiles or laughs.

I'm guessing very

>>320888

I don't mean to offend but nani the fuck?

I could give her some fur-trimmed ankle boots and try to pass the legs off as some custom Uggs or whatever, say she’s wearing arm warmers, wrap the tail around her waist under her shirt or passed off as a novelty belt, and maybe have her wear a hood or headphones to cover up the ears.

>>320903

Meat jersey girl, a lite guro based mg. Can transform the gore pile on her back into whatever she wants

>>320985

Okay, why is she named "Meat Jersey Girl?"

Probably just ask her to turn invisible, but god knows what sort of shit she'd get into.

Very hard.

no, they're very spooky

Very, I dont see any way to hide a 7 meter long snaketail on which she slithers. If people are so against monstergirls where I currently live I'd move to a place where I could live out my days with her in peace. I'd figure out how to make living there later because being able to be with her is more important than not being a poorfag. What would the rest of /monster/ do if waifus were real but we'd get heavily shunned or even oppressed?

The only way she'd stay hidden is if she acted like a real snake.

>>321524

>friends tease him about it so husband is somewhat conscious of me

>he still loves me so he doesn't want to break out with me

>get an idea

>ask him to go out

>once we're on the streets I plop onto his shoulders

>hiss at anyone coming nearby

>when people ask I tell them I'm his pet snake

>>320845

I agree, she's definitely up there, the SDM (and Gensokyo in general) is riddled with good girls who pretend to be bad.

Ironically girls like Tewi are probably among the most malicious girls that inhabit there.

>>321526

I was thinking something more like this but your idea is much funnier.

>>320810

>>320807

>Implying that both maids aren't equally as good

>>321600

>fencesitter

You're going into the abyss too.

>>321602

>equally as good

>I for one prefer shoggoths

You aren't fooling anyone.

>>321604

>personal preference

Like scat fetishists have their personal preference.

>both top-tier waifus

The two are completely different. One is bound to be objectively better than the other, and fenceshitters like you keep things from changing.

>end of discussion

Gonna watch more rick and morty with your High IQ?

>>321619

Yeah. My Yeti could wear long sleeves and pants or dresses to to cover most of her fur, but those hands and feet would be difficult to hide.

Fortunately, she'd be happy moving somewhere more rural if we had too, as long as the climate was cool enough. She doesn't handle hot weather well at all. It makes her lethargic and miserable.

She's very much a homebody, so she would be content even if it was just the two of us living out in a cabin somewhere.

>>321604

No. there can only be one and kikimoras are by far the superior maid. What man can resist?

I legit don't know what i'd do.

unless she has the sort of illusion magic that is just used to explain away plot holes, she's not gonna blend in with anything outside of a costume convention.

there's also the MIB mind wipe thing, if it's even possible, but that can't be healthy, or possible to do to too many people.

I think I may have to just move out into the country, but then i'll get shit internet

>>321637

>>321641

>kiki's are superior

>they can't even turn into useful objects for you to use

kiki's are a shit

>>321674

>can have anybody type

>can always be with you

>can protect you from any physical attacks

>probably smells like blueberries

>are smug

best maido

>>321677

>Caring more about her shapeshifting than her personality

>implying I cannot go anywhere with my Kiki

>wanting to hide behind your waifu in the face of danger

>inferior blueberry smell

This is what shog fags actually believe

>>321680

>not enjoying your waifu's abilities

>not fighting side by side with your waifu

>not having your waifu be attending to your house and being with you at the same time

>not liking blueberries

Inferior taste

>>321681

>prioritizing her abilities before herself

>letting her be put in harms way

>implying her split attention is as good as complete and undivided attention

>thinking blueberries are better than vanilla

>leaving her alone when you inevitably die

It is you who has the inferior taste

why would you hide your waifu?

>>320807

>Implying both shoggy and kiki aren't good girls with respective good points that make them unique and good girls

Still Danuki is best

>>321689

Perhaps the climate isn't good. Not everyone likes the idea of beautiful women with exotic characteristics stealing men from the well-to-do human female population. Imagine the outrage!

>>321677

>>320852

Hiding their tails and ears are a ability most-if-not-all Kitsune possess

>>321684

>>321686

>>321750

>Not liking slime

>can't handle your waifu being slightly more monstrous

>needing to buy supplies

>wanting a commie over a nice american mg

>still not liking the smell of blueberries

Maybe a nice human girl is more your type anons

>>321756

Finnish Wikipedia (on original creature) says that if house is well kept, Kikimora will help with chores and taking care of chickens. If not, she will bully people living there by tickling and whistling at night. She also spins textiles at night and people who see her do it will die.

She is sometimes said to look like regular woman who, unlike most Slavic women, keeps her hair open instead covered. Other times she appears as birdlike creature with chicken legs and beak but with arms instead of wings. Alternative appearance for Kikimora living in forest or swamp is small hunchbacked old woman in dirty clothing.

Etymologically "Kikimora" is speculated to be related to "Nightmare" and some similarly explained the myth with hallucinations during Sleep Paralysis.

>>321743

To be fair, I'd imagine the first few generations with MG's being a part of our world would be kinda dicey. It's hard enough for people to adjust to new passwords and friendships, an entirely new breeding pool would present some major challenges for the average Normalfag.

>>321763

>shoggoth

>a self-perpetuating mess

>manipulation of husband through Old One mind control rather than pure Orthodox will

>she will always fuss about me shitposting on /monster/ because she can't into a computer

you're grasping at straws here; the only thing i can concede is that other than the mindflayer she is the master of Halloween spooks

Alright you canine cuck lovers move it to the war thread, this thread has been derailed enough.

i hope she dislikes other people and like attics

>>321627

She could get away with saying they're big winter gloves and boots

>>321862

>tfw you just want to tickle her antennae and put crunchy peanut butter on her raptorial legs (arms?) so you can watch her mandibles munch away at the sticky food

>tfw you want to hold her humanoid hands while nibbling her rough chitin neck

>tfw you want to see her strong and commanding gaze momentarily become soft and loving right at the moment of copulation, showing you that despite her strength and thickskinned yandere nature she yearns for motherhood and raising a family of mantis daughterus

i can dream

>>321874

Well. Her sheer size and weight would be a problem. Say we if we go to a bar, she might need to sit outside of the booth or she cant take the bus because it cant support her.

Though, imagine a bar made to account for monsters though similar to the athletic center from monmuso. Aquatic monsters have seating priorities in a hot tub with non chlorinated water. Monsters that retain roughly human like proportions get regular seats with places to have their tails or seats so onis dont hit their heads on the roof. Spider girls or ones with non human lower halves get large padded surfaces to sit on like a booth but with more space. Maybe they could host "come meet a monster" blind date night.

>8 foot tall ogre

>implying I'd want to hide her attributes

>>320798

"she, uh, got her head caught in a mechanical rice picker"

>>322024

This got me laughing harder than it should