Long story short they accused me of sexually assaulting them in their sleep, but I know that I never touched them sexually out of sexual context and that the knowledge and experiences they brought me numbed me to desire more than they thought they knew, which on top of me dissociating most of the time mixed in with their trauma caused the situation to implode. I'll talk more about this in the coming days.
My father wasn't a very nice person to my mother, she began to drink and it got progressively worse, and as a result we all suffered. 3 years ago (4 years in August, got her smoking instead xd) she stopped. It didn't help that I decided to read the Demonata series by Darren Shan at what I imagine was a very vulnerable time.
When I was 17 (21 now) I got to see Bonobo live and it got me believing in something other than getting a job, paying my rent, and trying to find someone to be 'close' with. I'd continue going to dance events alone every so often and heard music and strangers here and there that were giving me flickers of hope when nothing else was.