>>691475
My girlfriend and I fell into the same category, in different parts of the US. It sucks, but if you persevere, God will see it.
>Too smart
Yes and no. Stupid people of any colour are suspicious of people who don't try to identify with them, and being clever makes it harder. To top that, yes–we are discouraged from knowing things at first.
You'll find as you grow up, a greater majority of our peers value the smartest brother in the room. Being judicious with when you let it show is the trick.
No, because you're also mixing in righteousness. Some of the simplest are the most innocent, and tiggas hate that shit. Evil can't abide to be in the same room with good. It just hurts too bad.
So much so that back in the day, they had a man nailed to a tree for telling the truth.
"If they hate you, know that they hated me first."
>Withdraw
Ain't nobody telling you not to work. Or not to be a part of society.
Moreso, Jesus tells us to go out into our communities. Live for the glory of God's name, in every respect. And "Be the lamplight".
Using work as an example, bring your prayers into it. Let God bless your hands as you go about your daily tasks, and don't hesitate to share his involvement if asked.
Otherwise, understand that The Lord leads you to wherever you stand; and let that thought guide you in conversation. You're meant to help those he's placed you around. Evangelize by walking and talking for the glory.
If you feel a family will be part of your life's ministry, don't stress about how you'll create a future for them. You can't, but God will. Follow the path he lays before you, and you'll find everything you need along the way.
Have faith, like you brought your walking stick, but not your wallet.
>Hip hop
Yeah. Everything you hear on the radio is hot garbage. However, you're onto something by applying yourself to 2pac's body of work.
Hip Hop isn't about degeneracy, per-se. It was storytelling. This is what I saw, how I had to live, who I was.
I hate a neoliberal viewpoint, but the least of us happened to be making a living selling drugs. My family grew pot in the 80's, and my mother still sells bootlegs and resells couponed goods to make ends meet.
History is really your friend when perusing your album collection. Or, if you're looking for something wholly conscious, with more modern form, I recommend Lupe Fiasco's Food and Liquor and Black Star as starting points. Two of the greatest albums ever made.
Kendrick Lamar writes compelling testimony too, but I'm suspicious of some of his work. Like "gold plating" on a cheap chain.
I hope this is helpful, instilling hope ro the future. Suffering builds endurance, and endurance allows for hope. Don't give up.