>>600472
I used to doubt every now and then and alternate between days of diligent religious life and absolute degeneracy because something touched my faith and weakened it.
Until last week.
Yes yes, one week isn't much, but hear me down.
This week, everyday I've been attacked by doubt, every day.
And everyday I didn't let despair get to me like I usually did before, but simply did the cross sign and wait for my emotions to pass.
That sounds so simple and yet, it worked! It worked and I've passed a full week of living the best christian life I could whereas before I'd get a doubt on wednesday, give it up, wallow in degeneracy, until Sunday when I said "This time this will be good"
I'd recommand reading "Mere christianity" by C.S Lewis, he explains why FAITH is a theological virtue and it's related to your problem :
I'm quoting him :
<Now just the same thing happens about Christianity. I am not asking anyone
to accept Christianity if his best reasoning tells him that the weight of the evidence is against it. That is not the point at which Faith comes in. But supposing a man's reason once decides that the weight of the evidence is for it. I can tell that man what is going to happen to him in the next few weeks. There will come a moment when there is bad news, or he is in trouble, or is living among a lot of other people who do not believe it, and all at once his emotions will rise up and carry out a sort of blitz on his belief. Or else there will come when he wants a woman, or wants to tell a lie, or feels very pleased with himself, or sees a chance of making a little money in some way that is not perfectly fair: some moment, in fact, at which it would be very convenient if Christianity were not true. And once again his wishes and desires will carry out a blitz. I am not talking of moments at which any real new reasons against Christianity turn up. Those have to be faced and that is a different matter. I am talking about moments where a mere mood rises up against it. Now Faith, in the sense in which I am here using the word, is the art of holding on to things your reason has once accepted, in spite of your changing
moods.