a8bd97 No.14253756
News from the Big N just came in, and oh boy…I don't know what to make of this shit.
>The Paid Online service now has a release window of September 2018. President Kimishima said there has been a shitload of new editions coming to the service, but said they're TBA
https://twitter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/958872936257019904
>A new mobile game is coming, this time a Mario Kart game for phones called Mario Kart Tour. Scheduled to be released March 2019.
https://twitter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/958876622517452801
>Nintendo and (((Illumination))) are partnering on a movie starring Mario, co-produced by Shigeru Miyamoto and Chris Meledandri.
https://twitter.com/NintendoAmerica/status/958878633652731904
So, thoughts? I'll get mine out of the way.
Firstly, fuck the paid online. They have yet to give any incentive to actually pay for this shit. If they actually want people to pay for this garbage, they better completely overhaul the whole system, ditch the phone app requirement, and actually give something worth paying for online for besides Splatoon and Mario Kart. Alternatively, just ditch the paid online. No free online, no buy.
Second, is the Mario Kart mobile game. I'm gonna reserve judgement until we actually see what they're doing with that, but knowing how Nintendo always has their phone games in portrait mode instead of landscape like LITERALLY EVERY FUCKING MOBILE GAME, then it's already dead on arrival. We'll have to see, though I'm shocked they announced it was in development a year before it's even out.
Lastly, is the Mario movie. You know Nintoddlers and soyboys are gonna eat this shit up, despite the fact it's (((Illumination))) making it. I wonder if we could spoil the movie just like The Force Awakens and the Boston Salt Party…
05e6fd No.14253798
what a perfect triumvirate of cancer
all it's missing is a $60 moba/mmo with on disk dlc and microtransactions
6c2c28 No.14253799
43e871 No.14253831
>>14253756
>Paid Online
>Paid Online where you have to have a shitty mobile application to fucking operate shit
If it gets implemented and not just pushed back infinitely, I don't think I'll even bother with a switch. I'll just wait for the emulator that's probably in the works, and even if not, there's nothing dropping that's worth dealing with this horrendous bullshit.
>A shitty mobage after the last two have bombed
>A shitty movie when literally no movie has been worth watching in years
Retarded as fuck, but not video games.
a8bd97 No.14253834
Hooktube embed. Click on thumbnail to play.
>>14253798
You know there's an ASSFAGGOTS coming to Switch right?
060bf2 No.14253849
>already being hotly discussed in the nintendo switch thread
>OP sucks monumental amounts of cock and felt this was worth its own thread when the other one is right fucking there on the front page still
Kill yourself.
9149b0 No.14253853
315186 No.14253858
Christ, now we have to wait ANOTHER YEAR just for some virtual console games.
315186 No.14253863
>I wonder if we could spoil the movie just like The Force Awakens and the Boston Salt Party…
I'd sticky it
1b7c50 No.14253878
>paying for online
>paying for DLC figurines
>paying for cardboard
is this peak wew yet?
a8bd97 No.14253879
>>14253849
>Thread is about the movie, and not the other big news that was also announced
>>14253799
>>14253853
You're not wrong.
48f935 No.14253895
>>14253878
While I would contest considering the utter ease in pirating Amiibo
The other two are unforgivable.
054e7e No.14253896
8bbb3b No.14253899
>>14253834
>pronounces versus as "V"
b6f992 No.14253901
learn to archive OP, that shit is volatile
315186 No.14253903
2fef50 No.14253911
I literally laughed out loud.
957434 No.14253912
>>14253756
Paid online is inherently not worth it at any price because we know companies can maintain that service for free, it's a scam because of the low cost of running the service and the high value of the service itself to customers.
Mario Movie will suck but I will watch it, not in theatres though.
Mario Kart Tour will suck but it will be fun for a laff.
48f935 No.14253988
>>14253980
That's virtually never been an argument anyone with any serious credibility has made.
a7e541 No.14253992
>>14253879
Actually I was talking about the paid online, the Switch thread is nothing but shitflinging about it right this moment.
70b5ae No.14254003
>>14253980
>Amiibo Online Pay Card made of Cardboard
Could be worse
48f935 No.14254004
>>14254001
Name one example.
b5ae80 No.14254007
>>14253878
The Switch is still a newborn, just wait until Nintendo creates even more retarded gimmicks then literal cardboard.
91d883 No.14254011
>>14253988
Cut him some slack. He thinks he's still on cuckchan.
66af34 No.14254026
Wow, so now Nintendo gamers pay for a peer-to-peer service they're hosting on their consoles and internet connections anyway, just like Sony and Xbox faggots. Now everyone is cucked.
This timeline is shit.
8e1903 No.14254033
>>14253756
You can be sure some people will defend this.
48f935 No.14254036
>>14254026
If there's any bright side, LAN options might open up for playing games over the internet. But as soon as they realize people can they will probably axe it
I don't even know if LAN mode made it into splatoon 2 in the end
e5ee3b No.14254037
>>14254026
Nigger they are going to make you pay for boxes, it could always be worse though.
the robot one looks kinda cool
48f935 No.14254039
>>14254033
Nobody cares about the 24% Human userbase on twatter faggot.
70b5ae No.14254090
>>14254026
>Everyone is cucked
Not on PC though
27ab84 No.14254108
>The checkered flag has been raised and the finish line is near. A new mobile application is now in development: Mario Kart Tour! #MarioKartTour Releasing in the fiscal year ending in March 2019.
ten bux it's gonna be gacha and we get niggers here defending it like FE heroes all over again.
48f935 No.14254116
>>14254108
It's mobile, gacha shit is basically mandatory if you want it affordable on the paystore.
ebcb12 No.14254118
>>14253756
>A new mobile game is coming, this time a Mario Kart game for phones called Mario Kart Tour. Scheduled to be released March 2019.
(((The Motley Fool)))
f12dec No.14254223
>>14254036
The new Mario Kart supports LAN
27f445 No.14254231
>>14253831
It almost makes me glad Monster Hunter jumped ship.
ebcb12 No.14254249
>>14254231
>It almost makes me glad Monster Hunter jumped ship.
>Jumped ship into another platform with paid online
Unless you mean PC then fine.
27f445 No.14254252
ebcb12 No.14254262
>>14254252
I honestly wish all games with online multiplayer gets a PC release because the serves will shut down eventually. Also, Konami can't pull that shit of killing the Silent Hills demo.
27f445 No.14254267
>>14254262
Even PC isn't immune, MMO's like Guild Wars 1 will be lost forever once the servers shut down.
ebcb12 No.14254284
>>14254267
People got MGO 1 to run an emulator so there is some hope.
70b5ae No.14254291
>>14254267
Just like Star Wars Galaxies or Matrix Online which got revived by the community?
e976e9 No.14254305
>>14254291
Matrix Online isn't in a playable state though.
1d9da4 No.14254323
>>14253831
SHE WAS WEARING A FUCKING SILLY HAT THIS WHOLE TIME?
70b5ae No.14254366
>>14254305
True, but it's getting there and the community was always pretty small.
71f78e No.14254394
>mfw I'm not a Switch bitch
c794f8 No.14254402
>>14253988
>>14254004
>appealing to authority
>for console wars
wew
bae4fc No.14254443
>>14254394
but you do bitch out switch
71f78e No.14254447
>>14254443
And you'd best switch out that bitch
c088bf No.14254465
>>14253756
>Pay for Online
Surprise nig-nogs, their time is up.
>>14253799
The Big Niggers Out of Space
114f6d No.14254488
>Mobile MK releases
>It has lots of well designed tracks and more get added periodically via DLC
>Lots of characters
>Graphics are high end for a smartphone
>Working online and matchmaking
>Support for remapping buttons to utilize external gamepads
It could be the best mario kart in ages
73d08d No.14254526
if it's p2w i will hack the thing like there is no tomorrow, of if they just want to make some profit and this is normal, it's okay…Mario Run was ok, not p2w, just human negotiation of stuff level, it's okay
27ab84 No.14254529
>>14254488
Don't go lying to yourself Hitler, there's always a catch.
bea106 No.14254531
>>14254488
You're way too optimistic. I don't think even Super Mario Run has mappable controls.
73d08d No.14254534
>>14254526
i bought the thing to me kid btw, no cydia, no crack, just bought the way it has to be, like a normie because it's right on my understanding…
0b4941 No.14254550
>>14254323
Who needs a silly hat when you can have ∞ glasses?
4c6b5e No.14254557
0e73e3 No.14254561
>>14254488
You're way too optimistic. Obviously what you mentioned would be best case scenario, slap a pricetag no more than $20 on it, with no microtransactions and it'd be fantastic. What we are going to get will be a mess, there will be 10 characters max, you having to grind or pay to unlock anyone but Mario and Luigi. Same goes for courses and kart parts, and the controls will be entirely touch and tilt based.
bea106 No.14254587
>>14254561
>the controls will be entirely touch and tilt based
I sure do love that shit about every racing/Outrun-like game for mobile.
71f78e No.14254648
>>14254534
>i bought the thing to me kid btw
We're reaching levels of not white that shouldn't be possible.
71f78e No.14254651
>>14254587
Speaking of tilt controls, what happened to Monkey Ball
4ce8b5 No.14254699
>>14254036
Splatoon 2 has LAN, but you need each console to have the wii u ethernet adapter. And have enough ports on your router to let 8+ players play.
70b5ae No.14254705
>>14254648
>Buying things for his kid
>Being near his kid
He's not a nigger, at least we know that much
7c0931 No.14254709
>>14254705
But he's posting on hatechan so that makes him a pedophile by default.
70f670 No.14254789
So the Nintendrones are finally getting shafted.
8d2887 No.14254818
>>14254557
The Fourth Reich
a2dfce No.14254874
>>14254789
The average modern Nintendo fan will eat all of this up no problem. Just as long as they can get Smash Brothers on it with a bazillion amiibo toys and cardboard pianos.
cec673 No.14254881
>>14254874
Hey, at least Nintendrones need at least one game to have a reason to buy their paperweights and cardboard.
692aec No.14254884
>>14254090
>DRM
>No physical copies of anything
>Shitty overpriced parts
PC is as cucked as everything else.
cec673 No.14254886
>>14254884
PC's cucked, but at least if you're not a braindead normie, you can avoid the cuckery. Consoles, on the other hand, you need to wait a generation for piracy to be an option, and piracy's the only way to subvert the DRM shit, if even.
433a36 No.14255088
>>14254529
If it's MK on a phone, expect Nintendo to give it some sort of design gimmick that phone oriented (like SMR was playing Mario with one hand) and less like what we would expect to see from past entries (FEH map's being contained to a single screen).
My prediction. Hold the phone vertically, have a 45 degree camera viewpoint above the kart (like GTA: Chinatown Wars). This would give you a clear view front and behind for attacking/defending and avoiding obstacles. Tilt to steer, tap in front/behind kart to use items, control speed through some sort of sliding onscreen button?
6029be No.14255122
>Nintendo and (((Illumination))) are partnering on a movie starring Mario
Get ready
697f69 No.14255126
>>14255122
God, I wanna fuck Ellen so bad.
697f69 No.14255130
>>14255122
Like, really really bad.
6029be No.14255135
>>14255126
excellent taste
697f69 No.14255190
>>14255135
Testosterone infused milk
Think her baby will turn out straight and betray the tranny in the future?
789e67 No.14255257
>>14254118
he was right the wii u was shit. Nintendo is hopping from gimmick to gimmick with there systems. they will run out of gimmicks.
15a412 No.14255333
>>14253756
>all those apologists on twitter saying it doesn't cost that much so it's okay to pay
>what are you? poor? how did you get a switch then? xDDDDDD
Glad I didn't bought that trash
The consumerist whore that is the average gamer slowly open his anus wider day after day to recieve the smegma covered corporate dick
7df8d0 No.14255372
>>14253756
>The Paid Online service now has a release window of September 2018. President Kimishima said there has been a shitload of new editions coming to the service, but said they're TBA
>new editions
Did they mean "additions" or "services"? "Editions" sounds weird when talking about a service.
dd04c8 No.14255486
>pay for online
retarded
I might consider it IF I have access to other "free" games. But considering how PSN+ also never really seemed enticing to me, I wouldn't hold my hopes up.
f2100b No.14255493
YouTube embed. Click thumbnail to play.
>>14253756
>Paid online service
I'm not giving Nintendo a god damn dime for online service if the servers continue to be shit. I still get dropped from every 4th-5th Splatoon game from time to time. The "classic titles with added online play" incentive is kind of nice I guess.
>Mobile game
There's already a shitload of racing games for mobile devices, but whatever. Hopefully it's decent.
>Movie
I don't look forward to hearing Mario speak in entire sentences. Vid related.
a5e3df No.14255500
>EA in the jaws of Microsoft
>Activision bleeding money into dying shooter garbage
>Ubisoft finally riding their repetitive social justice train into exhaustion
>Valve no longer a video game company
>Blizzard losing their grip on the overdone MOBA market
>Gearbox a walking laughing stock
And now Nintendo is actively committing dishonorable suicide with Poe's-Law-fulfilling marketing strategies. Who's even standing competently enough to take a fall anymore? Is this where the market, rather than crashing, withers into a hollow shell with smaller budgets and even fewer ideas?
3e12a2 No.14255505
Meh, I was warming up to the switch and the possibility of a new F-Zero, and now Nintendo goes and fucks up the free online.
God damn it.
70b5ae No.14255639
>>14254884
>DRM
Crack it
>No physical copies
Who gives a shit about physical copies when I can just add games to my HDD a much superior storage format?
Enjoy your Blurays I guess
>Overpriced parts
Maybe if you buy Jewtel and Nvigoy high end.
I'm not a retard unlike yourself though.
>>14254886
>Normie
>>>/cuckchan/
a8bd97 No.14255820
>>14255372
Fuck I meant to say "additions" not "editions" in the OP. That's my bad.
Please no bully
6c2c28 No.14255844
>>14255500
Is that a boy or a girl Renamon?
f88da2 No.14255913
>>14255639
>mfw someone saves my oc
polite sage
70b5ae No.14256099
>>14256068
Meh, I've seen Nintengoy pasta with more effort.
e0c51c No.14256102
>>14255500
THE CENTURY OF TENCENT HAS BEGUN
70b5ae No.14256109
>>14256102
>Tencent buys EA
That's terminal cancer right there
9cf4b5 No.14256186
>Mario Kart game for phones called Mario Kart Tour
Will it be even worse than the arcade mario karts?
f91737 No.14256193
>>14254884
>DRM
Tell me more about how you can rip switch games to your hard drive
>No physical copies
Tell me more about virtual console
>Shitty overpriced parts
Tell me more about amiibos and Nintendo brand cardboard.
8e8d3a No.14256212
>>14256186
Given how all mobile Nintendo games have microtransactions for everything you do, the answer is obvious.
10deea No.14256464
>>14254108
>mario kart gacha
>default character is Mario, all others need to be unlocked
>peach yoshi luigi mario end up being the three easiest to get, all others have ridiculous odds
>average match is 5 marios, 1 luigi, 1 peach, 1 yoshi
>occasionally a rare bowser, dry bones or toad that always wins because he's paying for instant boosts
>mythical waluigi player that appears once every thousand games
07de84 No.14256695
>>14253756
Once again despite having something of interest to discuss, OP is a giant fag
c2c9b0 No.14258346
>>14254108
>Mario Kart Gacha
>Unlock characters by winning
>Gacha for karts
>Gacha for tires
>Gacha for skins
>Gacha for kart skins
>Gacha for guest character banners
>Gacha for..
Oh no.
6cd17b No.14258435
Nice, when I buy one, I won't lose anything when I pirate it.
c4ec68 No.14259075
>>14256464
>>mario kart gacha
>>default character is Mario, all others need to be unlocked
More likely, to be paid.
>>peach yoshi luigi mario end up being the three easiest to get, all others have ridiculous odds
Super Mario Kart bullshit logic is at it again.
>>occasionally a rare bowser, dry bones or toad that always wins because he's paying for instant boosts
>>mythical waluigi player that appears once every thousand games
Once they realize Mario Kart 8 online is still live.
ee6700 No.14259188
>Nintendo Paid Online
YFW YOU DIDN'T FALL FOR THE SWITCH MEME
797095 No.14260507
>>14255844
What does it matter?
ae0d35 No.14260534
>>14260527
>8/v/ has been and will be a Nintendo board
4/v/ definitely, but people here mock Nintendo for their dumb shit
3c7294 No.14260870
>>14254699
Any USB ethernet device will work
148899 No.14261291
>>14253834
>ASSFAGGOTS
I'm yet to know what this means
ea41bf No.14262968
>>14262939
anon the nintendo labo thread got fucking derailed like a motherfucker, there was no way it was going to recover from talking about furry trap porn.
839e44 No.14263030
>>14262998
>that it only happened to Labo thread
Lurk more faggot.
ea41bf No.14263063
>>14263050
lurk more faggot
44d1df No.14263294
>everyone is too busy focussing on the payment aspect
WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING ON SEPTEMBER 18TH?!?
4f2c18 No.14263369
>>14263144
>>14263055
>believing the meme
that acronym was created to deflect the resentment everyone had for mobashitters.
48f935 No.14263371
>>14263294
Every nintendo switch will hold its owner at gunpoint to play splatoon 2 and Marty Kart
44d1df No.14263374
5c4e50 No.14263406
>>14263173
This hurts at lot more than it should have
48f935 No.14263415
>>14263374
Well yeah that might be a thing for them to port over their main "Key" game for online play.
c347bc No.14263502
>>14263369
The acronym was created to mock Riot's attempt at distancing itself from Dota (and by extension WC3) by making up a genre name that describes nothing,revisionist tard.
4f2c18 No.14265214
>>14263502
you are fucking dense. what image did i reply to.
>aeon of strife herpy derp is an acronym for assfaggots what a coincidence.
Yeah it was mocking riot but it wasnt an acronym at that time. it was just assfaggots, because only gays give a shit about the genre.
Contrary to what YOU believe revisionist faggot (nice projection btw) /v/ was openly hostile to all mobashitters.
4243f3 No.14265327
>>14253834
well, its about time
c347bc No.14266476
>>14265214
Nah,what you said was
>that acronym was created to deflect the resentment everyone had for mobashitters.
Implying that it was only created for that purpose,disingenuous runt.
Considering what it is an acronym to(intentionally saying homosexuals that lust for prostates) and it came as a response to something more natural(openly mocking PR people for being retards) rather than a deliberate attempt to "fit in" and deflect criticism.It was part of a joke which is why the faggot made it so long to fit the crude acronym.
>/v/ was openly hostile to all mobashitters.
By the time maybe(the ammount of old OC says otherwise but I digress),but for 8/v/,during the "golden years",ASSFAGGOTS 2 threads were tolerated and discussed somewhat civilly(as long as they were major patches/events bar a few exceptions) pre-second exodus.With Post Second-Exodus bringing (a)faggot(s) that dub-spammed due to autistic rage,but still tolerable to an extent.Things simmered down by the third-exodus,though Shitspams to slide the thread often happened.
Granted I am not sure if Dota was exempt from that (admittedly justified due to LeL setting a shit example for the rest of online games among other things like a completely controlled and fake competitive scene)anger when not piled with the rest of them by more ignorant folk.
dea6fc No.14271704
==NINTENDO== online sucketh
c347bc No.14271722
>>14271704
>Pointlessly bumps a shit thread when it reaches the last page
>One and done post that doesn't even try to incite discussion
>Doesn't even redtext correctly
147865 No.14271724
>>14265214
It was always an acronym you dumb fuck.
000000 No.14272302
>>14253756
>So, thoughts
>paid online
Cheapest online of the three I suppose. Seeing at how much money SONY is making with it Nintendo could in no way cockblock their investors anymore.
>phone game
There are no good phone games, next.
>movies
I mean we knew about the Universal Studios deal for fucking ages so this is literally not a surprise to anyone who's not fucking retarded. Don't care anyway
4a9c22 No.14272841
>>14253756
>>14254108
>the finish line is near
>over a literal year away
>for a fucking phone game
what the fuck
ec0cc3 No.14272927
ec0cc3 No.14272949
>>14263406
Wait is he saying he's a cuck?
228dc9 No.14272969
>>14272949
"Open relationship" as the kids call it these days.
ec0cc3 No.14273030
>>14272969
I can't find the source. Reverse searching the image just returns "Adolescent".
91d70e No.14273089
Oh yes of course, go…guy, you can totally buy the switch now, trust me I'm an anon like you, everyone should buy a switch and remember in our weekly thread of this exact same questions convince others to do as well.
Nintendo is the only game company that makes anything now good anymore.
They are the oasis of comfort and entertainment in the desert of hate and fake.
Their games are like benevolent videogame entertainment phoenixes, they are reborn every iteration, some times the phoenixes are twins! And the games are split giving you double the fun for just double the price, we did it with Zelda ™️ and we've been having Game Freak® do it for years with those pokemans you and I all love.
The new one is coming out to! Can't wait to play that on my Nintendo Switch.
But back to your subject OG, you should get the Switch, quickly too you know stocks are always running low, people are buying these things up like 10 year old hookers.
Truly a masterpiece in engineering, incredible solid design, you can drop it as many times as you like.
The controllers are revolutionary, split one apart for playing with a friend or significant other, maybe one of your waifus.
It even has anti theft protection, simply combine the controllers the incorrect way, and viola its unusable to any thief.
I love it for when my son's dad's family visits.
I'm a little upset, maybe even a little peppery, that you ask is it good now.
It was always good! An incredible library of games, you had Zelda and others! Not like you need others Zelda is open world now! It offers endless possibilities in all our favorite fantasy lands Hyrule.
Also Skyrim, dudes, imagine traveling down the subway and among your wonderfully diverse and happy passengers a cute girls sits next to you and sees you playing Skyrim, she would totally be into you and I bet she would invite you to her younger sister Batmitzvah, impress her by saying your character only eats food according hebrew dietary guidelines.
The Switch isn't only a console, a tablet, its a life improvement!
So go out there a grab a Switch OG, do it as soon as possible, take a pay day loan if you have to but get it.
It will be great.
48f935 No.14273096
>>14273089
Ironic shitposting is still shitposting you know.
91d70e No.14273107
>>14273096
>Getting mad at copy/pasta
This board becomes more and more alien to me everyday.
48f935 No.14273133
>>14273107
>you have to be mad to copy paste a phrase
>Trying to excuse your own trash tier shitposting
91d70e No.14273150
>>14273133
copy/pasta is something that has always existed on boards, calling it shitposting is denying board culture.
I have no idea where the fuck you come from but its not from the exodus.
Even in 2014, right before moot went full cuck, mods weren't banning copy/pasta and little faggots like you weren't getting upset by it.
Its gotten to the point where there are so many new people, no one is here to keep you in check so you post freely report posts that hurt your feelings and has led to this growing discontentment and hatred for faggots like you and the ones you come be big daddy mod for you in your IRC, or DICKscord server where you appeal to Mark for bans, with cake.
48f935 No.14273156
>>14273150
Are you sure you aren't upset?
697f69 No.14275029
>>14273156
You're the one who got bootytickled over a fucking pasta.
c4ec68 No.14276312
>>14259188
Can't wait to see the models ported to SFM.
fadf25 No.14276535
>>14273096
if you actually respond to this you're a retard