/v/ - Video Games

>>14233802

>Okay, let's make this spinoff game on a portable platform that Playstations owners might not own absolutely integral to the plot of the actual Kingdom Hearts sequel

>It's okay, we'll just remake it and put all the games on some new version of the Playstation in like a decade or so

God damn you, Nomura. You can make a spinoff without continuing the main story. When even the mobile games are relevant to the plot, you've fucked up.

>>14233756

TES has some pretty weird lore regarding temporal anomalies, CHIM, the Godhead and the dream ascension concept. Too bad each game only covers small event vaguely relevant to the overall TES universe.

>>14233843

>>14233796

He said they're all clones of the same character, so he's probably talking about Xehanort. Or maybe Sora. Xehanort tricked a bunch of Nobodies into absorbing small fragments of his heart to use them as incubators, turning all of them into clones of his heart with different bodies. It's part of some plot he has that he needs a total of 13 people for, but he doesn't trust anyone at all, so he decided the best way to accomplish this was time travel, mind control, body snatching, and soul-cloning. Pic related, it's him. Sora had temporarily fused his heart with someone who's heart was split in two (Ventus), leading to their hearts being connected. It also impacted the other half of his heart, making it part-Sora too. Then once that person's two halves were rejoined, the whole combined with Sora again - that's three people now. Then Sora sacrificed himself to save one of his friends, creating a Nobody of himself (Roxas), making four. Then the villains tried using Roxas as a middleman in a scheme to transfer Sora's power into an empty puppet body, Xion, but both her and Roxas developed free will and grew their own fragmented hearts somehow. Then Xion merged with Roxas, and then Roxas merged with Sora, leading to Sora now being a single body who basically has five different hearts inside of him. And the best part is, he doesn't realize any of this and has almost no idea who any of these people are.

So, tl;dr, KH's main hero is five souls sharing a single body, and the main villain is a single soul split up among about 12 bodies currently, and he still needs one more.

It's autistic edgelord trash.

>inb4 2deep4u

I'd say any Final Fantasy after 9 has convoluted/unnecessary fanfiction-tier plot. And you could even argue before that.

And if we're talking autistic plots, let's not forget Sonic '06.

>>14234130

Part of the reason pic related's plot is so complex is because most of it doesn't apply to the main story or the main character

>>14234056

>Now xenosaga, that is some bloated shit.

Xenosaga's not complicated, anon.

>>14233756

Time alteration seems to be the required tool for a complex plots.

>>14236117

I hate that because it isn't even amnesia

>Lets reference events that we have simply chosen to skip over

It is like reducing plot points to an inside joke.

And then they also time traveled

Not vidya but I actually watched all of this and effectively it was like waiting until the end to see the highly integral beginning where a plethora of characters are introduced to each other.

>>14234056

>>14234483

>Xenosaga

This is what I came for.

I really need to replay all 3 one of these days, it's been nearly a decade now.

It's such a shame we never got all 6 games.

>>14233756

Inazuma fucking Eleven.

You start by being a kid who really fucking wants to play some goddamn Association Football and ends up having saving the world from aliens TWICE (at least once using Stands).

I can elaborate on the plot if you want me to, even though it's not really the main focus of the games (and it bloody well shouldn't or otherwise it'd get too predictable)

>>14236600

I've played my share of JRPGs, but what you're describing exists only in a tiny minority of them.

Tales of the Abyss and maybe Grandia come to mind.

You're more likely to find decent characters that get explored further as the game progresses than what you're talking about.

Also, the whole point of a young protag is so the kids can relate to him more easily.

>>14236369

Wait, wut. I always thought it was just over-exaggerated football with light RPG shit. Now I gotta play this.

>>14233756

Legacy of Kain timeline gets pretty messed up.

>>14233756

>Kingdom hearts is convoluted

>Implying

>>14236089

>first game is a straightforward story about fending off alien slavers from the colony ship you were guarding where one of the on-board AIs whose only job was to open and close doors went rampant, which is its own in-world phenomenon in the field of AI psychology thoroughly described in lore terminals (alongside information about the player character), in practice he just turns you into his errand boy while spouting inane shit over the terminals and has you going around doing shit like freeing one of the client races of the alien slavers so he can get off the damn ship and fulfill his desire for freedom, this being an aid to the human colonists on the ship is merely coincidental

>the second game is about the AI from the previous game abducting you and sending you along to the homeworld of the race you freed in the previous game in order to find some kind of thingy there based off some random alien legend which might let him escape the closure of the universe, the only thing preventing his true freedom since AIs can live forever, and the incoming forces of the previous alien slavers led by one of the other AIs of the previous game who has a grudge against the other

>in the third game it follows an alternate timeline after the end of the second game where the alien slavers get BTFO and pull back by nuking the entire homeworld you were on which inadvertently frees a cosmic horror and fucks up the universe, however you happen to be implanted with ancient alien technology including a chip which induces time travel when shit hits the cosmic fan, so you find yourself randomly zipping between timelines through vague dream sequences, though you're never told you're actually time traveling and have to gauge it by the weird settings you're in such as working for the alien slavers and killing the AI for whom you involuntarily worked for in the first two games, and killing your fellow humans, until you can find the right time line in order to contain the cosmic horrors

>>14234316

Someone tried (emphasis on 'tried') to explain it, and it was… Well.

>>14234202

>It did, but it's very much a port of the GBA game rather than a remake.

>port

>completely revamped the entire map to be in 3D as opposed to isometric

>fights are no longer restricted to a 2D strip of land and you can actually walk around during combat

>not remade

What the fuck are you on about?

>>14237343

>>14237290

>>14237385

Alright, you asked for it, though it's gonna be long and hard to comprehend

<Inazuma Eleven 1

>You wake up as Endo Mamoru (or Mark Evans, in the chaos dimension where the UK won WWII and installed a new govt in Japan as the last Commonwealth member state)

>For some reason, you really feel the need to play some good ol Association Soccer

>How can anyone blame you, you're the grandson of Endou Daisuke, this universe's Japan's strongest and most iconic goalkeeper

>Capable of stopping literally anything, including tire trucks and gatling guns of soccer balls

>Endou follows the same hazardous training style by reading the secret memos your gramps wrote in a font that would make cyrillic cursive look relatively easy on the eyes

>Understandably, he's a /fit/, manly thirteen-years-old

>He enrolls steadfast into Tokyo's Raimon-cho's highschool, his gramp's and one that supposedly had the best soccer team of all times, again, coached by your CENAWINSLOL grandfather

>Actually it's in shambles

>the school principal actually loved the team but they don't have enough funding to spend on it and his bitchy princess daughter pretty much tells you to sod off

>they'll allow you to keep using the facilities if you manage to score at the very least ONE win

>pretty much impossible, since your team is made of two midgets, a fatass with an afro and the guy who fucks everyone in hentai doujins

>if that wasn't enough, (((Teikoku))) academy really wants to beat a Z-league bunch of high schoolers

>if they win, they get to demolish your schol (probably to buy back the property or because they get off on it or something)

>Endou scrambles to get kids to join his team (understandably no one wants to cause they would obviously lose and have a shamefur dispurae to their friends and families) and the only one bothering to show up is a SomethingAwful goon who just wants to feel important by saving the team at the last minute

>rumors has it a soccer ace has just enlisted in your school

>you start bugging him on and off school until the day of the match

>Teikoku obviously beats your ass, no matter what you do in the match, using bullshit shaolin soccer techniques and downright beating up your players

Before I go on, this is kind of a trend in all games: the officials only come into play during offsides or minor fouls, but are otherwise too scared to issue any card whatsoever or to calm down murderous children

>When you're about to be publicly humiliated in front of your peers, the goon runs off and the Vegeta-looking ace gets all emotional about his sister who got TRUCKED.COM before a match against Teikoku themselves

>he joins your team

>Endou summons enough samurai spirit to use the God Hand™, stop a shot and pass it across the entire goddamn field to the Vegeta guy (Gouenji), who spins around for a while and scores a fire imbued shot

>Surprisingly, the head coach of Teikoku, (((Kageyama Reiji))) forfeits the match, despite winning 10 - 1

>Turns out this was all part of keikaku to get Gouenji back on the field, as Kidou (Teikoku's captain) later explains, in the hopes of buying him off of Raimon in the future

>From that point onward you embark on a "beautiful" mission to actually win the minor league your team is eligible for participating, form Tokyo's best team and attempt to solve as many mundane problems as possible using footballs

>The terrifying enemies you encounter throughout the league include The Jungle Book™, an /x/-meetup, some peasants from a mountain village and a bunch of kids brainwashed into becoming goth androids

>Hands down your worst opponents will be the weeaboos that host their matches on the back entrance to their own maid-cafè

>first they flat out POISON your team mates (apparently it ain't cheating as far as the committee's concerned because being tricked by "muh dick" is not an acceptable defense), they'll literally and figuratively move the goal post and throw sand in your face and, upon finally losing, they doctor the results of the match to appear as they won (hope you didn't ditch the goon early on in the game, otherwise no one in the entire Tokyo area knows how to hack their computers)

<Inazuma Eleven 2: Fire/Blizzard

>Not even a fucking full minute after achieving glory in the league, your team gets attacked by motherfucking ALIENS of all things

>And these green-haired assholes have only two things in mind: property damage and finding out who's the strongest on Earth, determining that football is apparently an objective metric for doing both

>Bunch of slack-jawed faggot school mates unsuccessfully try and defend the campuses

>You step onto the pitch and get almost completely beaten

>The ayylmaos determine you're not nearly at your peak performance and leave to meet you another day

>With the school grounds destroyed, half your team hospitalized (but it was just the weakest lil shits not the good players) and your mortal enemy (((Kageyama))) still on the lam, you embark on a journey, venturing through all of Japan to create the strongest team a thirteen-years-old Zyzz can

>These include the chill equivalent of Gouenji but with a split personality on top, a Gyaru, a buddhist midget monk bastard, a peasant who can also read your gramps' instructions and the Korean LARPer from 1

>Since your old coach has got osteoporosis or some shit, you get the help of a P.E. lady who makes shady if not downright destructive things to the team

>(((Kageyama))) also appears and challenges you on top of a submarine, where he brainwashed two of Kidou's former teammates and a skinhead into being edgy members of the self-harm community, and submerges with his U-Boat as quickly as he had appeared, vowing to build an even stronger team

>Turns out his own father was a soccer player who couldn't bear to be second-best to Endou Daisuke and committed sudoku, so he vowed revenge on the whole Endou family by becoming that universe's Josè Mourinho

>Oh yeah also they kidnapped the Prime Minister of Japan but no one in the world cares about it that much

>After building up the team and fending off increasingly gayer aliens, you finally reach their home base

>In the deep, remote and hidden region of Mt. fucking Fuji

>You storm the spaceship, beat soccer-playing-robots and reach the Aliens' final defense, their strongest team

>And what follows is a bunch of Metal Gear levels of bullshit

>You were played like a fiddle from the very instant you saw the aliens

>The aliens were actually brainwashed orphans

>An (((arms dealer))) had to see his son's death go unpunished, as he was LIMOUSINED.COM by a member of parliament

>So the next logical thing he did was to buy up orphanages, find a kid that looked almost exactly like his son, prep him into becoming the ultimate being by imbuing him with radiation from a fallen meteorite that he just happened to come by during his negotiations, reach up (((Kageyama))) to experiment it on the Koreans and use his immense wealth and technology to build Star Trek equipment to terrorize Japan

>That P.E. lady was also a mole for the "aliens" all along and used her position to collect data on your strength to relay it to her master

>Obviously Endou gives less of a single flying fuck, he really just wants to play soccer and solve everyone's problem with the power of defeat-induced-friendship, so you beat the alien-steroid-filled kids and activate the self destruct mechanism on the mother ship

>While everyone was busy not dying, post-op Michael Jackson, the weapons dealer's assistant, manages to snatch some of the steroid meteorite before it explodes, flies onto Raimon High and secretly instigates your sick allies into taking some drugs, hoping to rule Japan with that last ditch effort

>Following that there's a way anticlimatic final confrontation against spandex wearing thirteen-years-old with a DRUGS R BAD message, also all the orphans are now safe from any political repercussion, the arms dealer is behind bars and the UN apparently didn't even realize there was no government in Japan for a month

>>14241686

I forgot to mention that there's a plot point where Gouenji gets blackmailed into stopping playing or they'll pull the plug on his sister, but it's probably the least interesting thing about the story

<Inazuma Eleven 3: Spark/Bomber (this is when things get weird)

>A few months after the aliens incident, it's finally time for actually important worldwide-followed events, like the Youth League World Cup

>The Ministry of Sports sends a controversial coach to pick Japan's representatives, you'd think Endou and his team would get a free pass but no, they need to take a test like everyone else

>This includes a couple of the orphan aliens, the skinhead and a bunch more former friends and enemies

>Endou, Kidou and Gouenji obviously manage to get on the main team by virtue of being the MCs and the strongest there ever was

>And so they embark on yet another journey across the world (on a tiny atoll in the middle of the Pacific), but first they get to beat a bunch of nobodies captains from former beaten teams, all led by none other than the P.E. lady (who apparently also got away scot free, the Judicial system is that bad)

>You beat them and proceed with the qualifiers, where Japan encounters and beats a bunch of racist stereotypes, including Australian shitposters, Qatari bronze bodied and luscious desert niggers and the Korean traps from before, including what can only be described as a living emoji

>Now it's time for the Internationals, and this is when the gloves come off

>Basically the moral of the story is that Europeans are stronger than ayylmaos

>Very realistically, the English team acts extremely pompous upon giving the what-for to the Japanese and end up dead last in the league phase, the Argentinians struggle to win against a weakened team and act all smug about it, the Italians are more interested in sports politics than actually playing right and America gets a free pass

>The least realistic thing of the whole series is the fact that America is actually competent and that Michael Jackson Jr. is on the team, alongside two former allies

>The island where the World Cup is being held actually holds a dark and mysterious secret

>The game goes to huge lengths to confirm that not only does the Christian God exist, he himself created Association Football so that Angels and Demons stopped warring each other and didn't shed blood

>All the cool Hissatsu super moves and energy beams and fire shots you took? All an imitation of God, for humans were created in his image

>The World Cup is the catalyst for the Armageddon and every x-ty years they need to have a sacrificial bride for Beelzebub and what I assume must be the Archangel Gabriel

>Failing to meet these standards, humans must fight to save either, so naturally two of Endou's friends get hitched with supernatural deities

>Endou creates two teams to go after fucking God and Satan, using Europeans and the power of friendship to defeat both

>Along the way they also get brainwashed and it's handwaved that they have to be stopped as the combined forces would tear through the fabric of space and time

>Nothing too unusual for Endou, both teams down and now with his eyes on the actually important competition: the one against Italy

>Along the way, yet more m night shyamalan shit goes on

>Your granpappy wasn't actually TRUCKED.COM, he just took one for the team and went oil-drilling in the Congo to form another team of impossibly strong negro players

>(((Kageyama))) gets to manage the Italian team using a very unconvincing disguise and confirms that IT WAS HIM, KIDOU, IT WAS HIM ALL ALONG, EVEN HIS IMMEDIATE STAFF BOUGHT IT

>But he did so to buy expensive miracle eye surgery for a little Italian orphan so it's okay

>Nevermind the fact that he's using his coaching expertise to also manage yet another team to crush Inazuma Japan from the shadows

>A (((Brazilian entrepreneur))) was actually the one funding the arms dealer from 2 to research the effects of an indoctrination therapy to build up a massive army of super soldiers who can also dance the samba

>Endou obviously manages to beat them after entering a way dope Aztec maze

>Finally, the day of the finals arrives: it's none other than against Congo Zaire Cotarl, which sports replacement goldfish versions of Endou's original team members, including a clone of himself who is him but somehow stronger and blacker

>You still beat them and Endou Daisuke and cement yourself as the strongest thirteen-years-old on the planet

>In the aftermath, Daisuke still doesn't feel the need to alert his own biological daughter of where he's been for the last forty years, Cotarl goes back to being poor and/or playing in Ligue 1, Kageyama gets TRUCKED.COM himself for having outlived his purpose and the Brazilian Jew gets captured by Interpol, and no one ever feels the need to tell anyone that they beat God and he wasn't as much of a challenge compared to Jamal and his friends.

>>14241584

>>14241684

>>14241686

>>14241992

Hot damn, why have I never heard this absolute mess of a story before. That is legitimately impressive with how ridiculous it gets.

>>14244503

>>14241992

I didn't even get to the best parts, fam, my splitting headache prevented me from doing just that.

<Inazuma Eleven 3: The Ogre

This is where game and anime slightly deviate, but in a way that doesn't really hinder the continuity too much (since apparently Ares is going to be like directly following the OVA's story)

>During the events of IE3, MEANWHILE, IN THE FUTURE, a paramilitary organization is studying the effects of Association Football onto their day and age's youth

>Basically, your actions in the past inspired everyone and their mothers into stopping any competition that isn't soccer and the society of the 2100's is a dystopia where bread&circuses are the norm and men and children would rather play and watch soccer matches than doing any other practical thing like advance the sciences, conquer distant planets, prepare for an incoming alien invasion or remilitarize the Rhineland

>So this Futurreich decides that it needs to send their strongest eleven mercenaries back in time to fix whatever has caused society to collapse so easily

>Using his trans dimensional tv station, they get to watch Endou Mamoru's past victories and determine that Japan winning the World Cup was an event so unusual and awe inspiring that it single handedly destroyed the future (and who can blame them)

You'll see a trend throughout this later part of the series, where every single bad thing happening in the future could have been easily averted if you stopped at any point in time playing soccer. Endou being unpersoned would have solved fucking world hunger for all we know.

>To utterly crush the Japanese spirit, the committee decides that they'll have to strike you when you're at your peak (the game never explains this but I'm assuming they just want to avoid having another pro-player emerge, were you to lose earlier than the World Cup finals, otherwise it's just an useless waste of time travel tech)

>So the Chronolegionnaires known as Team Ogre travel back in time to the early 2010's to teach you a lesson about how soccer is bad and a waste of time, using soccer (which begs the question, if the paramilitary organization hates it so much why'd they feel the need to give a full footie training to their mercs?)

>They appear before you during your match against team America and make every single possible textbook error in how to handle that whole "changing history" thing:

>They give you ample time to train even harder as it's pretty much guaranteed they'll be one of your final opponents

>They appear in front of a crowded stadium, just to drive home the point that yes, someone on the island will try and kill some of the contestants (though it was in front of Americans and there's barely any official during the competition, let alone a police force of any sort, so it's kind of justified)

>Rococo (Cotarl's star goalkeeper) is lied to that Endou Daisuke will cease his oil-drilling and go back to his biological nephew, which enrages him and creates an even stronger soccer player (again, who would've done the exact same thing Endou did by inspiring others to just play more footie)

>They waste resources into building a giant stadium that somehow can eat other smaller ones just for their final confrontation

>They completely forget about Endou's great grandson, who also owns time travel technology thanks to Kageyama's grandson's help and who keeps pestering Endou about training harder and letting him on the team to use his own future tech and defeat the time travelers (all this despite the fact that Endou Kanon is a rather prominent member of a future footie team and that they have already a reward on his head)

>They also never bother to sabotage your club house, or to falsify past newspapers or to literally enter the tournament under a disguise, they just really, really want to show you that their superior ancap military training can beat you at your own game

>Hilariously, the Congolese are still stronger than future ancaps, so you wipe the floor with them

>Ashamed and defeated, they just up and leave, having learnt that soccer can be fun too, while the paramilitary chief just leans back in his gamer chair and thinks about how much of a waste of everyone's time this all was, while Level 5 greedily collects money from hopeless dweebs who thought this was another legit entry in the series

>No one in the past thinks much of them though, so the game ends with the same finale as the original story

>>14245186

I should also mention that the anime OVA does something even more retarded, where Team Ogre travels slightly more back in time to defeat Endou at the regional league finals, but rather than destroying his chances early on they just enter as a legit team from Totally Ordinary High School, destroy the Korean LARPers (ensuring that everyone would be even more focused on winning and that (((Kageyama))) gets to make his escape even earlier) and then just proceed to win fairly until the finals, where Endou Kanon has had enough time to assemble half a team of future allies of Endou's who are just technically and physically stronger than Team Ogre. I don't know which continuity Team Ogre manages to fuck the worst.

>>14233796

>EYE

Came here to post this.

>Hey, wanna dig up dinosaur bones and revive them and have pokemon battles?

>start on an island where you meet weird and silly people and basically are on jurassic park for kids

>have an irritating as fuck little kid friend who finds every way to basically make every situation stupid

>thankfully you meet a tribal dude who is part of a cult who worships the thrusting power of the hips and finds your hips thrusting technique to be perfect and tells your friend she's a shit

>dig up dino bones

>take them to a lab with super autistic bone cleaning minigames that are fucking satisfying

>the better you do, the better your dinosaur

>oh, sorry, they aren't "dinosaurs"

>they are Vivosaurs

>vivosaurs are different in that the device that brings them back to life uses the surrounding soil in the recreation process and integrates it into the dinosaur

>found on an eroded plain? Vivosaur can shoot razorblades of wind

>vocanic soil? Fire breathing dinosaurs, yo

>have fun pokemon-ish battles with them and go autistic collecting bones and making the vivos better and better

>organization who wants to do crime shows up of course

>they try to get this one vivosaur who is so soaked in arctic material that it can fuck the world or something

>you go on a shot quest to get a fire opposite to fight it

>you put them down in, like, a few minutes

>except for this one chick

>she's kinda hot but is doing some shady shit

>find her in a volcano

>a rock nearly kills her but you free her

>she don't know what's up

>she suddenly turns into a dinosaur and attacks

>what

>you beat her and she becomes some humanoid dinosaur thing and runs away

>eventually sighting of more humanoid dinosaur people happen

>suddenly aliens

>decree earth is fucked and dinos should have still been around and it's humans fault they aren't and so they are gonna reclaim earth for their people and dinosaurs

>fighting robot dinosaurs and dinosaur people

>beat them with the power of haxx vivosaurs

>he learns dinos weren't wiped out by humans but just due to the way the planet was forming

>big boss gets depressed and you learn the sob story

>apparently a horrifying space fish eats planets and every part of it is a weapon

>ate the alien's home planet and they tried to terraform earth to be a new home

>meanwhile, dinosaur chick lady likes you and wants to help you and sticks up for you since you keep kicking everyone's ass

>find out the dino regenerator device works in reverse and is actually a Stasis device we've been using backwards

>decide to teleport into the brain of the planet eater and use the power of a pokemon battle to kill them

>your waifu insists she come along for support

>surprise, every part of this planet eater thing is a fucking weapon

>fight a hell of a boss and eventually kill the brains

>plan is then to use the fossil stasis to withstand when the planet eater dies and get ported and revived back on earth

>you wake up but the blast corruptd your waifu and now she'll forever be a staue

>except the tribal dude tells you "no, you little faggot. Use the power of your hips if you wanna save your waifu!"

>by using the power of your hips, you revive her from stone in a G rated sex scene

>you share a moonlit afterglow on the beach

>she snuggles you and thanks you on behalf of the ayylmaos, humans, and earth

>credits roll

The sequel is not as complex but no less batshit.

>>14234330

The best part is there is still a universe where numidium is still rampaging and fighting the almderi. The Tribunal didn't actually beat him, just banished him iirc, since he is in effect a god.

>>14235611

The dwarves accidentally became the skin(armor) of numidium when they tried to ascend to godhood with kagrenacs tools. The only dwarf left is the one in morrowind.