/tech/ - Technology★

get on your knees now

you need at least a bsc if you have no relevant work experience

Suck da big mayne's dick

Learn to counterfeit, it will take less time and you’ll make a lot more money. Do $10s and if you’re risky try $20s, $100s will get you caught in no time. Also don’t get caught. Keep operations mobile and don’t make big purchases. You’ll be fine.

(((Not FBI)))

>>876955

fuck

what if I have a portfolio of stuff? I mean I have schoolwork examples of JQuery things and .less stuff and some Java and some C# Visual Studio stuff and a bunch of other things. Surely all that has to count for something?

>>876937 (OP)

Lie and find people to lie for you as references. Dress up in khaki pants and a white polo tee-shirt for the interview.

If you go 1 month after high school without a job, you're unemployable. Always be employed already when looking for jobs, or you're unemployable.

-t. NEET who does tech better than Target tarts, but gets passed over for those tarts because ">muh work history." Did I mention I self-studied electronics, and these tarts are fresh off the roastie-roaster?

>>876937 (OP)

>associates degree

you are fucked you either need an actual 4 year degree, or you are already good enough without anything and have a good github not needing anything else

>>876967

This, but sell your counterfeit money for bitcoins. I'm willing to buy your first batch, just ship it to your local FBI office but make sure it's a large enough amount, I don't deal with quantities small enough not to be a felony.

>>877055

If you're shit the fault is of the guy who hired you despite you showing no qualifications, if the guy with a degree is shit he had no way to know and his ass is covered. Get a buddy to recommend you.

>>877072

You don't need a goddamn degree to put electronic parts together into a final product. In fact, about the most generally applicable degree is a business degree, all other degrees are super-specializations!

>>877056

so if i throw a bunch of shit up on github they'll want me?

>>877094

Having actual real shit on github is more important than a degree. It shows you can build real things. Not weekend homework assignments.

>>877101

What counts as "actual real shit?"

>>877115

If you can complete it in a week its not real shit.

>>877115

write a rest api for a content addressed data store or something

>>876937 (OP)

>So I'm about to graduate with a associates degree pretty soon, how do I get a job writing code?

Didn't you make this same post a few weeks ago?

Anyway, you need to check a box on the diversity checklist, and you're good to go. So minority race/ethnicity (but not South or East Asian), female, or some kind of tranny. Being a faggot probably would have been sufficient at one time, but male faggots are absolutely passé and are now out of favor. HR triggerkin hate white male fags almost as much as white male straights now.

Obviously, the more boxes you're able to check, the more likely you are to be hired.

If you were enough of an unfeeling, oppressive shitlord to have been born a white male, I would suggest dressing in female clothes and cutting your cock off. Also look on ancestry.com and see if you have any Native American ancestors. Maybe you can convince them you're an Ojibwe tranny or something.

just be yourself :^)

What's the cheapest way to off yourself for sure?

>>877291

Rent a jetski, drive it out to sea

>>877076

>You don't need a goddamn degree to put electronic parts together into a final product.

Tell it to HR cunts who nowadays believe you *do* need a degree to do virtually anything except maybe sweeping the streets.

>>877808

Yeah HR has now the job market in their pocket, everything goes through HR, every single ad. They have no idea about the job or what makes anyone good at the job. So it is basically a test of patient before you actually do the real interview.

>>876955

fuck u faggot, dont listen to him. listen to me. kill yourself

>>877808

You know most jobs are not gotten through HR departments right? Thats when they cant find people and need to go through inefficient shit.