/monster/ - The Last Bastion of Romance★

>>321688 (OP)

dang that's a smug shog

virgin anubis vs chad hellhound

Who dares?

>>321712

>Who dares?

Who dares, wins.

A challenger approaches! Centaur girls have four holes too.

>>321718

Someone didn't read the OP.

>>321699

Yeti vs Yuki-Onna

>>321715

>>321720

horses are pretty dangerous animals if they want to be

>>321726

That doesn't seem to include venomous snakes but I have to emphasize that they will bite humans as last resort. Producing venom uses up energy so they won't waste it. IIRC some species can even give dry warning bite(s) where they bite the threat but do not inject any venom.

Fucking disgusting kikifags.

Chochin-Obake meets her match in Will-o'-the-Wisp

<Chochin: My heart burns with devotion for my husband! Every morning it gives me great joy to bring him out of his sleep with warm caresses. I will stay with him till the end of our days.

>Wisp: Silly little paper doll… The candle that burns twice as bright, burns half as long. I will never let Master go, even in death.

<How cold of you---let him rest in peace! Are you sure you're not a Yuki-Onna, lying around like a dead fish, only moving to sap her man's warmth?

>I am like a Yuki only in the sense that I have loved Master ever since he was a young lad. No mamono has ever loved her man as I do.

<Keeping your man trapped in that gloomy dungeon is no form of love. He will burn to ashes and you will love the ashes because you can't tell the difference.

>I do not burn Master. My flames are cool and they lick him all over.

<The flame in my womb won't ever hurt my man.

>My entire cage is my womb.

<Your fancy old wrought iron doorknob, you mean. Your man will never ever get wrapped up in warm flowing silk after an evening of fiery lovemaking.

>Bah! Silk, from a silk lantern that everybody forgot about for one hundred years.

<And everyone forgot about you for your entire life!

>My flame will never go out.

<I burn with passion. You, miss, burn only with impotent rage.

>You will burn with jealousy when you see what I will do to Master tonight.

Red oni best girl.

What would a dorome fight for?

Gas the shoggoths meido war now!

>not monster but she'd hold her own.

>>321825

>walking dog with feather duster

>has to constantly clean behind herself because it's shedding season

>limited to hands and feet for combat

>only textures are flesh and fluff

vs.

>loving multitool of a wife

>collects her own mass after herself like a standing roomba if she isn't already the entire house

>constant 360 degree surveillance and immune to all physical damage and forms weapons from her own mass

>any texture you could imagine and more

How can slavshits even compete?

Ah, the eternal meido war. Shogs versus Kikis. It's like emacs versus vi(m), but with tits.

I don't really have skin in this game, for obvious and pic-related reasons, so I'm just gonna get comfy, enjoy some hot cocoa, and spectate from the sidelines.

>>321854

>the infinitely weaker one is the chad

The shoggoth loves you for who you are and simply grants your every desire. The dog-bird demands you change to suit her like 3DPD.

>Shoggoths just make people unsettled.

Libel coming from the feathered fucker.

Shark vs. Raiju

>>321916

competing as top headpat slut

>>321869

>>comparing your waifu to a roomba

>he doesn't have a pet name he teases his waifu with

>>hedonistic NEETdom

Anon, I have to pay bills to get the electricity and other necessities somehow, and government gibs are certainly not it.

>>not wanting fluffy tail

>not simply replicating it and literally any other texture you desire

>>everywhere you step is actually purple slime

Hardened, purple slime.

>>not wanting to be old and surrounded by fluffy daughterus and granddaughterus

>not wanting to be eternally young, visit ancient beings and learn forbidden knowledge with your loving dozens of amorphous descendants

>>the innocent fluffy meido is more unsettling and disturbing than the eldritch slime abomination

Well that's awful rude to say about kikimoras even if they are inferior.

>>321861

>>321901

You will get yours, mark my words.

>>321927

>>321869

You gay niggers from outer space, both of your waifus are shit. The perfect waifu is the Holstaur after all who needs a old maid or a slimy one when you can have a milk maid

>>321954

>Maids

A lich could just boppity-boop some magic and clean up the whole house. You inferior tool-using maids have no ground to stand against a skilled user of magic. On the topic of monster girls fightan each other, would a Lich and a Wight basically be the same thing, except the Wight is a rich prick?

>>321959

>>321960

>not wanting to be a skeleton lord

>>321959

Being "alive" is only like, what? 80 years? Compare that to an eternity of being a cool skeleton guy with a hot wife. Death doesn't seem to too bad in that prospect.

>>321960

Why don't you want to be a skeleton, anon?

>>321970

pic related

>>321968

>umm

It's called Overlord and you may in fact need to go back from whence you came, newfriend

Found a chart in another thread

>>321961

>Wanting to be a monster boy

>Not wanting to be strong and noble Paladin

So damn W E A K

This is my waifu. I don't think it is good to fight between each other who has the best waifu, as all waifus are best waifus.

Shoggoths are the worst meido. Kikis are a man's maid and expect someone worthy of the title master. Shogos are okay with pure trash probably because it's so close to home.

>>322916

Kikimoras are better. They want you to be better and will help you to be better. Unlike that overglorified eldritch multitool that encourages its master to be a NEET. In addition to this they remove kebaband shoggothsjust as easily as dirt

>>322949

>>322970

>it's shedding season

>kiki waifu can't take more than two steps without leaving a trail of hair she has to clean up

>kiki gets caught in rain

>smells for entire day

>house catches on fire

>kili can't run properly because feet are biologically high heels

>can die

>only serves you if you are strong enough to justify her own insecurity about serving you if you aren't better than her

>>323034

>Us kikifags might have lost every single arguing point, so it really comes down to whether or not you can see your waifu's bulge :^)

>A kiki is pregnant with your flesh and blood and she will continue your genetic line.

>implying shoggoths do not

>Not to mention that if it's a human boy then he'll be born traumatised

>human boy

>not carrying your genetic lineage

>100% shoggoth DNA human boy

Also literally what would traumatize the kid?

>>322961

Pretty sure paladins get angels, anon

>>321688 (OP)

shoggoth vs kikimora

>not best maid, automaton

I'll prove it

>serves to serve, not to manipulate you

>has healing tools and a non-lethal built in gun.

>nearly indestructible

>doesn't want to be furniture or change you

>works well with gremlin

>professional, but can change into something more fun with electricity(or maybe just asking)

>beautiful white and brass, not plain brown or creepy purple

>doesn't covertly rape you or have you rape you, instead waits for your pleasure

>>339760

>not to manipulate you

Elaborate.

>has healing tools and a non-lethal built in gun.

No need to heal if all your wounds seal on their own, and a shoggoth can literally make and use any weapon.

>nearly indestructible

Already covered by shoggoth.

>doesn't want to be furniture or change you

What’s wrong with physical invincibilty or sitting on a chair made of your waifu?

>works well with gremlin

>waifu already isn’t optimal

>professional, but can change into something more fun with electricity(or maybe just asking)

If you mean completely emotionless by professional, sure and more fun is just regular horny mamono.

>beautiful white and brass, not plain brown or creepy purple

Enjoy the cold hard metal.

>doesn't covertly rape you or have you rape you, instead waits for your pleasure

>police help I was secretly raped and didn’t know, also I raped myself.

Also she won’t wait for your pleasure if short circuited or low on power.

>>339769

>Elaborate

simple, shoggoth works for you to meld with you. Kikimora works for you to get spirit energy. Automaton has no angle, they work for you to work for you. It is the end, rather than the means.

>No need to heal if all your wounds seal on their own, and a shoggoth can literally make and use any weapon.

[citation needed]

>Already covered by shoggoth.

[citation needed]

>What’s wrong with physical invincibilty or sitting on a chair made of your waifu?

not much, but being physically changed by your girlfriend is pretty dang creepy

>waifu already isn’t optimal

non-point, if the same dude wanted a harem at least the automaton already works well with another monster. Neither the shoggoth nor the kikimora have that upside.

>If you mean completely emotionless by professional, sure and more fun is just regular horny mamono.

not emotionless, but poor at expressing it. Plus being able to go full succubus is an extra feature not even shoggoth and kikimora don't have.

>Enjoy the cold hard metal.

all monsters are soft or can become soft with magic, non-point

>Also she won’t wait for your pleasure if short circuited or low on power.

shoggoth disguise themselves as objects to secretly get off. Kikimora drive you to rape them. No thank you.

shoggoths want to physically change you to better serve their purposes, kikimora want to mentally change you to better server their purposes. Automaton don't want to change their master, rather just work for him.

>>339812

>Kikimora works for you to get spirit energy.

>Automaton has no angle, they work for you to work for you. It is the end, rather than the means.

According to the entry

>once they enter this state they won't hold back on service until having their insides filled with a large amount of semen.

Once they enter the short ciruited mode, they will immediately try to have sex with you in order to restore power. If that isn’t trying to get spirit energy then what is it?

>[citation needed]

>if cut with a sword, the blade will pass through their body without damaging them

She makes every tool imaginable by man to serve, look at her image, there’s an iron pan, you can see the tip of a knife, there’s teeth; she can harden her slime so it’s not a stretch to imagine her making a sword or shield.

>[citation needed]

She’s a slime: weapons aren’t going to do much, and the frying pan in her image hints at a resistance to fire.

>not emotionless, but poor at expressing it.

We’re talking about how she acts, right?

>their facial expression doesn't indicate any emotion

>almost monotone voice

Sounda like she acts pretty emotionless to me.

>Plus being able to go full succubus is an extra feature not even shoggoth and kikimora don't have

Kikimora’s are pretty succubus-like if you aren’t good enough and you can literally ask a shoggoth to act however you want her to in the bedroom.

>all monsters are soft or can become soft with magic, non-point

Now it’s your turn to provide a source.

>their purposes

Which are?

>>339819

>They never attack unless they literally need it.

So basically every monstergirl? Remember, while many can live off of regular food, it is nothing in comparison to how good spirit energy is. Sating their lust might as well be a need. What makes them any different?

>laser guns? stun guns?

Make that just stun guns, anon: she’s non-lethal. And why bother with a stun gun if she can just knock her opponents out or bind with a heavy tentacle?

>doing literally everything you ask her to? isn't that super loving and devoted?

Apparently not if you’re a shoggoth or kikimora because then it’s for some ulterior motive.

>plus electricity shows how much she loves you

You mean the love other monstergirls show you on a regular basis?

>removed using demonic energy

And if your automaton is low on energy can she afford to expend that?

Also she’s still going to be cold.

>literally every monster can roleplay

Not yours, anon.

>melt together with master

And what is so wrong of them to try and get closer to the one they love?

>automaton it's "serve"

You are implying that serving is in of itself its objective, yet can it not be considered its “objective” is simply to find and keep a way to access of spirit energy to ensure its survival?

>>339826

>So basically every monstergirl? Remember, while many can live off of regular food, it is nothing in comparison to how good spirit energy is. Sating their lust might as well be a need. What makes them any different?

let's put it this way, literally every monster forces themselves on their husbands, shoggoths don't take no for an answer kikimora force themselves on lazy men.

automatons ask if they can work for a man, they don't force themselves on men.

>Make that just stun guns, anon: she’s non-lethal. And why bother with a stun gun if she can just knock her opponents out or bind with a heavy tentacle?

range?

>Apparently not if you’re a shoggoth or kikimora because then it’s for some ulterior motive.

I'd be ok with it if they didn't force themselves on men

"They mostly obey their master's commands, but if he should refuse their service, they would not have any of it"

-shoggoth

"but perhaps because of their innate officious (Intrusively enthusiastic in offering help or advice) nature"

-kikimora

meanwhile

"they request permission to serve at his side as an attendant"

"They regard serving others as their raison d'être [the sole or ultimate purpose of something or someone], and by learning the necessary information themselves, they're naturally able to provide their masters with personal care and serve as a bodyguard, plus they will faithfully carry out any order given"

-automaton

>And if your automaton is low on energy can she afford to expend that? Also she’s still going to be cold.

they have a mouth anon, plus blanket snuggles or living in a warm place exist too. so do clothes. And, they are resistant to low temperatures.

>Not yours, anon

what is electricity? plus i said could not well. mantis would likewise have issues

>And what is so wrong of them to try and get closer to the one they love?

literal forced bodily transformation, I dunno

>You are implying that serving is in of itself its objective, yet can it not be considered its “objective” is simply to find and keep a way to access of spirit energy to ensure its survival?

just because I need food to live doesn't mean food is my purpose.

>>339835

>automatons ask if they can work for a man, they don't force themselves on men.

These two aren’t necessarily connected and they

>reach towards his lower parts, guided by the commands being transmitted

Not your commands, she goes for your dick on her own for her needs.

Also you’ve yet to produce a reason which differentiates her attacking for her needs to ordinary monsters attacking for theirs.

>range?

Just catapult a dense glob or a net at the target.

>what is electricity?

Starvation. You are forcing starvation on her to enact your fetish.

>they have a mouth anon

That will be cold.

>blanket snuggles or living in a warm place exist too. so do clothes.

Clothes and blankets only retain body heat. That’s why blankets and clothes are cold in the winter until you warm them yourself.

>And, they are resistant to low temperatures.

Don’t forget high temperatures too. How is she going to get warm if she’s insulated and doesn’t let heat in?

>literal forced bodily transformation, I dunno

A transformation that you don’t notice and proves to be a benefit?

>just because I need food to live doesn't mean food is my purpose.

Chicken or the egg question. Are you working to sustain yourself or are you sustaining yourself to work? You can’t prove she’s doing either.

Unless you are willing to order her to die.

Also missed this

>only deliberately

When is she going to need to be fire resistant unintentionally? And if it does happen it probably won’t be so fast she can’t change.

>>339862

>Now that "fed" is in your phrasing, I can agree.

fair

>Not when your body is constantly shifting, losing and gaining mass.

[citation needed]

>A fair point, but if that's the case why would their body get cold ever, but their mouth stay warm? Why wouldn't their body stay warm as well? Inconsistent logic.

I assume all monsters (except maybe the ice ones) are warm all the time as all monsters are half human

They can. All monsters are [half human], so there isn't a single race of them incapable of using polymorph. Of course the time needed to learn it depends on intelligence and the accuracy of the morph varies. (If they're bad at it then the colour of the skin might remain unchanged, skilled races like Gyoubu Tanuki on the other hand can even hide the indications of magic when turning human) Furthermore, monsters of the Alraune family can normally walk by using the roots below the flower even without using polymorph.

-Q&A with KC

>A possibility, but please do not try and shift your argument mid debate, we are talking about electricity and using it intentionally.

fair-point, however I'm sure basically any monster would be willing to starve for a little bit to please their husband.

not that I'm going to do it, I quite like the default personality

>Not if you're sleeping or deeply preoccupied.

first off, with the "pleasure" that comes from melding wouldn't you wake up? plus I doubt any shoggoth would only do it in the night.

and there's the fact that swords and stuff phase through you, I'd notice that for sure.

>Generally.

far more often than the other maids, literally only when starving.

>Unconfirmed and simply a hypothesis. This should not be stated as a fact in your conclusion.

It is confirmed in the profile, whether or not they can do it at will is another matter

>[citation needed]

Look at her profile image. Notice the purple pancake separate from the body. We can assume this was at one point part of her body, meaning she is capable of breaking off pieces for various purposes. Since she is willing to lose mass, it stands to reason she will find a way to regain that mass; most likely through growth from spirit energy.

>I assume all monsters (except maybe the ice ones) are warm all the time

That’s a fine point but as you implied in >>339835 you said they have a mouth separate from the methods to keep the body warm which inplies that only their mouth would stay warm while the rest of the body cooled.

>starve for a little bit

Desperation to sustain yourself is a bit more than a little, but I don’t doubt she would willingly do it to satisy her master.

>swords and stuff phase through you, I'd notice that for sure.

Unless you are regularly going into battle or cutting yourself, the phase part doesn’t naturally occur often. Also to clarify I was referring to the transformation process as less noticeable. Yes, post transformation it will be noticeable when being serviced or injured. Also a keyword in KC’s profiles is to pay attention to the word “like.” Service is “like” melding together.

>far more often than the other maids, literally only when starving.

Which is what I meant by generally.

>whether or not they can do it at will is another matter

That is what I was trying to refer to. I thought you meant they could do it consciously as an objective statement.

>>339890

>Look at her profile image. Notice the purple pancake separate from the body. We can assume this was at one point part of her body, meaning she is capable of breaking off pieces for various purposes. Since she is willing to lose mass, it stands to reason she will find a way to regain that mass; most likely through growth from spirit energy.

that's a stretch but fine

>you said they have a mouth separate from the methods to keep the body warm which inplies that only their mouth would stay warm while the rest of the body cooled.

If you think I meant that, I didn't. Simply that they can give BJ's without using demon energy to remove clothes. Sorry about that, my bad.

>Desperation to sustain yourself is a bit more than a little, but I don’t doubt she would willingly do it to satisfy her master.

It's debatable that they are starving, as the profile just has the main core disabled.

Honestly it's up in the air, but I don't doubt that they would do it to pleasure there master.

>Unless you are regularly going into battle or cutting yourself, the phase part doesn’t naturally occur often. Also to clarify I was referring to the transformation process as less noticeable. Yes, post transformation it will be noticeable when being serviced or injured. Also a keyword in KC’s profiles is to pay attention to the word “like.” Service is “like” melding together.

shoggoth melding is a imitation of the demons of chaos at best, and a forced melding at worst.

honestly possibly the worst bit of shoggoth

>>339892

>that's a stretch but fine

What's a stretch about an amorphous blob losing a chunk of itself?

>Sorry about that, my bad.

While we're on the topic of confusion, is her body warm or cold? In >>339835 you acknowledge that she must find external methods to keep herself warm despite her body being insulated and in >>339887 you assume her body is warm. Which is it?

>It's debatable that they are starving, as the profile just has the main core disabled.

Comparing robotics to biology here, isn't this the same as disabling a creatures mitochondrion i.e. disabling ones ability to turn food into energy thus making her run on fumes?

>shoggoth melding is a imitation of the demons of chaos at best, and a forced melding at worst.

I'm confused by your wording.

>Melding is an imitation of the demons of chaos at best.

vs.

>Melding is a forced melding at worst.

>>339896

>What's a stretch about an amorphous blob losing a chunk of itself?

the fact that it's from art instead of the profile, but whatever.

>While we're on the topic of confusion, is her body warm or cold?

warm, they are half-human and she's not a ice monster.

>Comparing robotics to biology here, isn't this the same as disabling a creatures mitochondrion i.e. disabling ones ability to turn food into energy thus making her run on fumes?

it's probably more like anaerobic exercise than turning off a mitochondria. Not as efficient but still workable as a back-up energy source.

>I'm confused by your wording.

It is purported that the ecology of constantly desiring to become one with their man may be an incomplete imitation of the way that their creators, the demons of chaos, have sex with their husbands.

-shoggoth profile

basically, shoggoth imitate their creators at best or literally force transformation at worst