/monster/ - The Last Bastion of Romance★

>>317423 (OP)

>Name

Utmer

>Weapon

Penis

>Name

Tony

>Weapon

A speecy spicy meat-a-ball Truncheon

>>317423 (OP)

I look up and down the weapon rack inspecting each blade incredulously, but in the end, I set my eyes on a simple bag, I open it to reveal it filled with pistols, all loaded and cocked. I reach in deeper till I gotten my whole forearm in there, showing the bag to be deceptively big on the inside. I quickly put forward the bag and say my name "Sebastian. S-E-B-A-S-T-I-A-N."

The acolyte carrying the engraving tools looks disgruntled as he quickly runs back off stage and grabs a sewers kit instead, he quickly sews my name onto the bag in gold twine. With the ceremony finished I take my bag of pistols and walk off to my next adventure. "Blessings of Sigmar upon you!" The Grand Theogonist exclaims before the heavy doors shut behind me.

Just as I start making my exit out of the chapter house, I'm quickly assaulted by another witch hunter who puts his arm around my shoulders and yells right into my ear "Long time no see kiddo!" "Uncle Marus? Is that you?" that old son of a bitch can't believe he made it, he got me into witch hunting in the first place, vouched for me and everything. Even acted like a dad for me when my real one died helping him on one of his hunts.

"So kiddo, finally a real witch hunter, eh? What'd you have to do to earn the title? From Volkmar himself as well. Did ya root out a chaos cult right here in Altdorf, did ya kill a vampire count, no no no… Let me guess ya went all the way to Norsca and kicked Archaon in the balls? "Well, I uh…" "Well don't keep me waiting I wanna hear how ya managed to reach Templar rank so fast."

>What did I do to earn this title anyhow?

>>317423 (OP)

>t I was never good at these ceremonies, I always forget the important parts: such as the prayers, proper apparel and worst of all I always freeze up at the most important parts.

Someone like that would never become a Templar in the first place.

Anyway, MC's name should be Horus B. Archaon.

Or just Horace Horace. Or Hans Ohrenzwicker.

>>317491

"I dicked a daemon so hard, she got sent back to the warp." Marus just stands there looking at me, as if I just cursed Sigmar, Magnus the Pious and Karl Franz's names right here. His expression eventually changes to that of one who heard the most ingenious joke about a Follow of Ulric, Taal and Myrmidia walk into a tavern, then lets out a jovial laugh that could make the grimmest priest smile.

"Sebastian you joker, you must be careful to not play around like this." "Uh… I'm serious, while me and her were doing the deed she knocked over one of the components needed in the summoning ritual, thus she was sent back to the warp." Marus quickly grabs me by the shoulders and shoves me against the wall "Listen, Sebastian whether you're joking or not it is best to not tell anyone of this because if another witch hunter finds out you'll at best be given a quick death for consorting with daemons." I just simply nod back to the grizzled man

"Good, now that is taken care of I require your aid for another matter, Marienburg for the last few months has been experiencing thick fogs that come in from Manaanspoort sea and take men of all ages, just the men though, women are left alone for whatever reason and I need someone to watch my back so that I don't end up missing like the other hunters. Of course, there are plenty of contracts available to one such as yourself, go take a look and if none of them catch your eye, you can come with me.

"I thought witch hunters go town to town in the search of evil?" "Well going town to town doesn't exactly pay the bills and not every shopkeeper gives us free stuff on virtue alone." I quickly make my way over to the job board and start reading off the list of jobs

>I Sir Roderick d'Parravon demand that a witch hunter, preferably one well versed in the art of the fay, go into the forests of Athel Loren and retrieve my son, Bartholomew d'Parravon.

I see a small note at the bottom: Due to the political nature of this contract, care of the utmost is to be taken as to not strain relations.

>Help Wanted: A horrible winged creature with a scream to scare the souls out of the elderly has taken from just killing our livestock to killing any who work the fields. Vanhaldenhof, Stirland

Great Sylvania and where there's smoke there's fire

>FUCKING BEASTMEN. Signed, Boris Todbringer

Guess he's gonna go on another Drakwald forest crusade. Don't know why he would post a contract in a Sigmarite witch hunter chapter house, considering his disdain for the Cult of Sigmar, maybe the beastmen really pissed him off this time?

>Should I go with Marus or should I take a contract?