And so God said unto Sam,
"Thou shalt straddle him softly"
"And pull thine undies taught"
"Fore he shalt be thy silly boy and touchie thy silly stick"
"And thou shalt wubby wub him all the way down"
"All the way"
And so Samuel embraced Rankowski.
And Rankowski's sternum fractured.
And Rankowski's thoracic vertebrae fractured.
And Rankowski's lumbar vertebrae fractured.
And Rankowski's cervical vertebrae fractured.
And Rankowski's clavicles came out of his own asshole, and they too fractured.
And so the fractures begat fractures and Rankowski was fractured all the way down.
All the way.
The two became one, and this formless blob was the image of God.
God's tongue lept from the river, and it became a Dorito.
And it did a 16khz dance as it sprechen sie spake unto them,
"Thou shalt wear adult nappies and enter the women's restroom"
"And thou shalt take her hand and bestow statutory acts upon her palm"
Samuel ate the Dorito,
his tongue intertwined with the Holy Spirit,
and the body of God was within him.
He beat up mommy and maxed out her credit card,
and then molested hi