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File (hide): 202932f2403d039⋯.jpg (48.64 KB, 856x480, 107:60, serveimage.jpg) (h) (u)

[–]

 No.87741>>87935 [Watch Thread][Show All Posts]

Anyone else here a wizard? I pick up my hat tomorrow.

 No.87742

you are a lizzard warry


 No.87755>>87758

Unless you're straight there's no excuse for being a furry wizard. Even then just buy a fursuit and some female will go for you eventually.


 No.87758

>>87755

>Unless you're straight

You nailed it right there.

>Even then just buy a fursuit and some female will go for you eventually.

Like I said i'm straight, I'm not into furry "females". I would do cosplay but no friends and solo cosplay would be too weird.


 No.87781>>87785

File (hide): e7a4582c0ff8624⋯.jpg (63.65 KB, 800x600, 4:3, Bailey Blackwood.jpg) (h) (u)

I'm 27, so I'm three away from the 30yr wizard status. This is my waifu.


 No.87785>>87809

File (hide): e2892e092e538b6⋯.jpg (229.99 KB, 1206x674, 603:337, e28.jpg) (h) (u)

>>87781

>30

Well, fuck, I thought wizardry was 40. I haven't been keeping up on my memes.


 No.87789>>87813 >>87814 >>87828

File (hide): 3af3d586d3ea328⋯.jpg (128.33 KB, 500x488, 125:122, 1509120355721.jpg) (h) (u)

If you want to be technical, I lost my virginity at age twelve. But discounting that, I've really only had one relationship, and only JUST barely considered "adult" because we were both in high school. Had sex only twice since then, and it's been like a decade. Considering I'm one holiday season away from 32 with barely enough sex to count on two hands, I might as well be a wizard.


 No.87802>>87810

i am 22. im asexual xenophile tumblr whatever. the human body is boring and borderline disgusting to me. i have not found a human being sexually attractive since i was 12 and had raging hormones and wanted to fuck anything. now that i have developed taste, only true abominations can make me erect. i jack off to giant alien pigs covered in grease farting and stuff.

also even if i were attracted to human beings, which i'm not, i, too, have a character i am in a relationship with and i would never cheat on him.


 No.87809

>>87785

>Tfw lost my virgin card at 22

Thank christ, all that rage and frustration was eating me alive.


 No.87810>>87812 >>87814

>>87802

Get out of here nor.alnigger I've only had sex once.


 No.87812>>87813

>>87810

idk why you quoted me


 No.87813

>>87812

I meant to post this at

>>87789


 No.87814>>87815 >>87817

>>87789

"i had sex like four times and im a wizard xD"

>>87810

"i've only had sex once im so wizardrly xD"

wow this thread is the ultimate cancer.


 No.87815

>>87814

reminds me of when people with a job call themselves NEET


 No.87817

>>87814

I never called myself a wizard you dumb nigger


 No.87823>>87825 >>87826

Well today is the day, where are my powers?


 No.87825

>>87823

being a german nigger.


 No.87826>>87827 >>88956

>>87823

happy birthday dude. do you have a ps4? we could play together


 No.87827

>>87826

I had a ps3 but it went ylod (without the yellow light)


 No.87828>>87906

>>87789

>If you want to be technical, I lost my virginity at age twelve.

What’s the story?


 No.87829

File (hide): 64023e827af94c3⋯.png (2.34 MB, 1800x1600, 9:8, r9.png) (h) (u)

Yeah, I'm sort of a wizard. Got fucked by health problems. The rest was realism and accepting my fate. And drugs. I've been told great drugs are better than sex. But I've only tried good drugs, so idk. I don't think we're going to have sex, but if you have some hookups, we can do drugs together.


 No.87831

File (hide): 561b610f701f87e⋯.png (394.21 KB, 940x1084, 235:271, 1541956081304.png) (h) (u)


 No.87832>>87918 >>87932

File (hide): 1114cfd58868511⋯.jpg (134.2 KB, 650x1024, 325:512, 1541955956717m.jpg) (h) (u)

File (hide): fbefe59012d9762⋯.png (421.47 KB, 940x1033, 940:1033, 1541956019775.png) (h) (u)


 No.87848>>87910

File (hide): 5b5985ed02ab435⋯.jpg (61.28 KB, 900x777, 300:259, DfPkMvZUwAAPMJ-.jpg) (h) (u)

File (hide): b121cf9652e917f⋯.jpg (54.63 KB, 1200x1067, 1200:1067, DhZI3BVXcAAnw8I.jpg) (h) (u)

File (hide): 123e8be9dd8fd57⋯.jpg (52.01 KB, 1200x1067, 1200:1067, DhZI2XnX0AAalLP.jpg) (h) (u)


 No.87906

>>87828

I was twelve, he was ten, we wanted to try butt-fucking, we did, it wasn't that fun so we went back to doing other stuff that was more fun.


 No.87910

>>87848

these are shitty fucking edits


 No.87918>>87919

>>87832

Or just watch Totally Spies.

But I understand how you end up with weird fetishes. As a kid I had that obsession with dinosaur characters, especially good guys because that made it so wrong, eating other characters. Could have ended in a vore fetish.

I also remember I really missed my diapers just because they were so confortable. Could have ended in a diaper fetish.

However, while I understand it, doesn't make those fetishes less retarded, especially for an adult.


 No.87919

>>87918

>totally spies

kek


 No.87921>>87924

Virginity is not something to be "lost". It's a gift to be given to your opposite-sex spouse on your wedding night. Current year hedonistic fornication culture be damned.


 No.87922

File (hide): bb207028a9a2de8⋯.png (61.27 KB, 417x346, 417:346, boomer furry.png) (h) (u)

I'm on a carousel of thoughts really

from this side of the ring you have the 25y spooky skeleton waiting just 5 more years to became a true wizard, not touching a single vegana or (not his) benis in its 6/10 of life

to the another side of the ring we have the 25y suicidal retard waiting for 2020 so he can join 27 club with so much style that jonestown would look like childs play

all in or call it


 No.87923>>87928 >>88372

20 y/o virgin

I'm mostly a volcel, because i feel like im above everyone. There's not been a single person i've met that i'd say is worth my time in bed. Or worth my time as a partner in that regard.

i've had a few guys say they were gay for me

I once punched a girl because she wouldnt stop feeling my hair

I'm utterly beyond this


 No.87924

>>87921

Also a great gift for a rapist


 No.87928

File (hide): e0bb6d97e070929⋯.gif (589.52 KB, 245x180, 49:36, 1460616244148.gif) (h) (u)

>>87923

do you even listen to yourself


 No.87932>>87936

File (hide): c7bb4b5300a6f79⋯.png (162.1 KB, 780x800, 39:40, redpanels zootopia.png) (h) (u)

>>87832

CHILD INDOCTRINATION GANG!


 No.87935>>87940 >>87956

>>87741 (OP)

I have a question:

Does it count if we were raped/molested and have been completely turned off from sex?


 No.87936>>87938 >>88653 >>88679

File (hide): cc973f45df8718a⋯.png (1.63 MB, 1280x995, 256:199, King K. Ool.png) (h) (u)

>>87932

It's the furry conspiracy, don't you see? Furfags are trained only to find anthros attractive, as such their drive to reproduce is diminished, and thus the only way they can propogate themselves is by transforming others into furfags. But since the adult mind is already too advanced and repulsed to "get" anthros, furfags must resort to indoctrinating the children. There is a global, furry elite here to transform the entire world populace into furfags. Forget the cultural marxism meme, the nazifurs are merely puppets with a uniform fetish, what we REALLY have is cultural furryism. The furries are everywhere, they're in our TV shows, our movies, our children's books, even on our cereal boxes! Everywhere you look, furfaggatory. This is how humanity ends, not with a bang, but a murr.

They don't want a master race, they want a master species; not jews, but animals. They don't want a one-world government, but a one-world orgy, with a single crowned anthropomorphic king. It all makes sense now. Since time immemorial animals have been worshipped as gods, they use mortals to do their bidding. Every furry-owned corporate elite company is trying to indoctrinate people into their own species. The religious, cults of old have emerged into the global conspiratorial elite of today. It is sometimes assumed that in exchange for their devotion to their particular god, said god bestowed upon them magical powers. In exchange for their decency, self-awareness, common sense, and attractiveness, they were rewarded with money, power, fame, and sex. A fursona is merely a representation of whose side they've been brainwashed into, as all the powers vie to indoctrinate more and more furfags; this is a conspiracy over a thousand years in the making.

The god fursona, or godsona, is the be-all, end-all. Entire nations have gone to war over whose godsona is superior, egyptians, romans, etc. all fighting for their murry purry daddy. They want a single god fursona to be the only object of worship on the planet, and to make the rest of the populace their sex slaves. The holocaust wasn't about an aryan killing millions of jews, it was about a wolf killing millions of rats. The USSR had nothing to do with communism, it was about a bear rounding up millions of pigs for the slaughter.

"The Furry is immunized against all dangers: one may call him a weasel, rat, snake, dog, it all runs off him like water off a fur coat. But call him a Furfag and you will be astonished at how he nuzzles you, how he pounces on you, how he suddenly notices your bulge: “OwO What's this?” - Joseph Goebbels


 No.87938>>87941

>>87936

please kill yourself.


 No.87940>>88431

>>87935

No, you are what are called Used Goods.


 No.87941>>87942 >>87948

>>87938

stay mad


 No.87942>>87950

>>87941

no way its not cool to be a furry anymore you had your mainstream success it was like the 80s wolf of wall street you guys got busted doing a bunch of illegal shit and ruined it for yourself.

get rekt furfag.


 No.87948

>>87941

>its not cool to be a furry anymore

>implying it ever was

>you guys got busted doing a bunch of illegal shit and ruined it for yourself

you heard him guys, go home. Show's over.

>get rekt furfag

NO U!


 No.87950>>87973

File (hide): 5a412ac932e0799⋯.png (275.61 KB, 1280x910, 128:91, fae0827a06350058c55f0308f3….png) (h) (u)

>>87942

Now is the best time ever to be a furry.


 No.87956

>>87935

Rape counts, molestation does not. Losing virginity means someone's dick went in someone's hole.

Also, everyone has bad shit happen to them in life. If you want to spend the rest of your life missing out on something extremely fulfilling and satisfying as sex and pair-bonding, just so you can continue to think of yourself as a victim, that's entirely your fault. Like thinking you'll never enjoy vegetables as an adult because you were force-fed them by your parents when you were a child.


 No.87973>>88719

>>87950

The style of things drawn right now in furry art couldn't have been conceived of just decades ago, much less centuries ago. Things are being realized and unleashed. Furry art's still constricted by a few ropes that have yet to be discovered and severed, but that just means the best is yet to come.


 No.88372

File (hide): 41cfac8c9c480c7⋯.png (39.25 KB, 300x100, 3:1, 1413163580402.png) (h) (u)

>>87923

You sound like a true sociopath.


 No.88431>>88434

>>87940

>used goods

Generally said by those nutballs who only have sex with virgin women.


 No.88434

>>88431

>Generally said by those nutballs who pretend to only have sex with virgin women.

FIFY.


 No.88469>>88477

File (hide): 166cf046ab1da93⋯.gif (931.16 KB, 500x204, 125:51, 1n5grkdrSOz1s2a0zmo1_500.gif) (h) (u)

25 year-old wizard apprentice reporting in.

At this point in my life, I fully believe sex is just a meme; some big cosmic joke or performance that is something akin to talking to ghosts or traveling with extraterrestrial life. I've been viewing sex (specifically furry) since I was 9/10 years old left unattended on the internet and it just seems foreign to me in real life. Since I was a naive child at that time, my mind has firmly connected sex with the same fantasy as going on epic RPG quests or exploring outer space killing mutants since it was all viewed through the same immature lens. I'm a virgin and I have no idea what genitalia (excluding my own) even looks like without a screen as a barrier.

Personally, I hate myself to much to really pursue any relationships even when people have shown me interest. I'm completely average - in height, weight, looks benis size and devoid of any real personality. I feel as if I would actually let my guard down enough to be in a relationship, the shallow mask would crack, and they would see I'm an extremely boring and fake person.

With all that said, I wasn't always this bitter. I did have one amazing "relationship" when I was younger that was the closest thing I've felt to love, but didn't lead to sex


 No.88477>>88522

>>88469

I don't know why you feel so bad about yourself. The thing about "average" is that it only means you're like everyone else. Almost everyone is boring and fake; that's life. For every one woman who ends up with a jock stud with a pornstar dick, a quarterback paycheck, and a list of exciting hobbies, there's ninety-nine other women who have to settle for less. You'd be fine if you got the fuck off imageboards and rejoined real life.

And that one woman? She'll turn around to "average" once she finds out her flawless Adonis is either a manwhore who doesn't love her, or secretly gay.


 No.88522>>88571

>>88477

>You'd be fine if you got the fuck off imageboards and rejoined real life.

Not the same anon, but it's the other way around.

When (or if) you manage to rejoin normal life, and things are going pretty well, then you'll leave imageboards as you have better things to do.

Starting by leaving imageboards only makes the whole thing harder, and it's already difficult enough.


 No.88571>>88576 >>88672

>>88522

The problem is that people on imageboards are universally complete and utter cunts in every tiny bit of the fabric of their lives. You have to be, or you won't survive here for a minute. Leaving here and trying to hang out with normal people while having that kind of personality would be disastrous. Kinda like a soldier returning from war with PTSD, except instead of having panic attacks at loud noises, he calls everyone niggerfaggots and screams about memes that nobody cares about.


 No.88576

>>88571

>>88571

This this this.


 No.88653>>88676

>>87936

This is the worst example of copypasta-type material I've ever seen. You should feel ashamed of such poor-quality work.


 No.88672

>>88571

For a living example of this, see eeriefag.

All of that loser's problems stem from taking imageboard culture far too seriously.


 No.88676

>>88653

wasn't meant to be a copypasta you imbecile, if you go to an imageboard expecting the mon lisa you're gonna be disappointed, lower your standards you loser.


 No.88679>>88683

>>87936

I know it's not a popular opinion, but I fucking loved that post. seriously hilarious and light-hearted. If it was original. if it's pasta, then fuck it.


 No.88683

>>88679

it was original content and thank you


 No.88719

>>87973

At first I was terrified of the secret degeneracy capable with vr/ar technology.

Now I realize what an opportunity I have, and why I should relearn blender immediately.


 No.88956

>>87826

I have a steam account if that matters. Username: Jurajango


 No.90710

Do you want me to call out your bot?

天安門廣場 1989




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