No.119083
Everyone thinks quite a lot when they make a profile, and everyone tries their best to make them both look great and sound great to everyone compatible, right?
Right?
Not necessarily.
This is a thread for the shittiest profiles around, ones sad, hilarious, or otherwise entertaining. Not in particular about bitching.
Profiles like this: https://www.f-list.net/c/badass-tia
Or this, https://www.f-list.net/c/abandon%20lonliness
Or this little beauty, https://www.f-list.net/c/Tek%20Syrreth/
No.119112
I dunno, that badass celestia sounds like she's a blast.
No.119114
Searching on pastebin for random logs is hilarious
http://pastebin.com/fnjHdMiD
No.119116
https://www.f-list.net/c/enshoku/
I love the "reading your profile" NO kink
No.119118
Searching "put this on your page" in descriptions invariably returns bad profiles.
For example: https://www.f-list.net/c/arytom%20silvercrest/
No.119218
No.119293
>>119218
>Partner/Mate/Lover: your mom
incredible
No.119294
>>119218
Come on, this one's a parody. Go find a genuine article
No.121465
No.121467
>>121465
>OFFICIAL EDGELORD of DARK CITY and RP BAR.
Is that a whiff of self awareness?
No.121654
https://www.f-list.net/c/Sierra%20Bighorn
>approach them out of the blue, just to see what the hype is about
>they respond in-character, of course
>have a little clever teasing back and forth
>their side of the conversation devolves into Ctrl+V'ing "Suck My Dick." after everything I say ad nausea
Apparently most of the day they just have slimcat running their ad and farm walls of text from desperate assholes who praise them for… not responding.
No.121661
>>121654
>fucking Yoko has posted in the guestbook
OF COURSE SHE HAS. So much for "I'M VERY PICKY AND EXPECT ONLY THE BEST!"
No.121663
>>121654
I'm not sure what you expected
No.121670
>>121663
Being a retard on purpose is still being a retard, Anon.
No.121683
>>121661
>People expecting yoko to be good
Hahahaha
No.121689
https://www.f-list.net/c/Okami%20Jubei
>Jubei for unknown reason or how does he cause to destroy the village in Afghanistan
The reason is because he came on his sisters paws and his dad bannished him from the ninja clan. I'm not joking, he removed it from his profile because people kept messaging him about how retarded it was.
No.121695
>>121683
Oh, no, I know she's a shit - but it's hilarious to me that she's a shit when stroking her own ego so fervently and in that obnoxiously masturbatory way, with her posse of circlejerking friends at the helm to boot.
No.121757
Posting the most desperate, beta loser here. Whatever you do, don't be as cringey and autistic as this fucker:
https://www.f-list.net/c/samuel%20hartly/
No.121758
>>121757
What's so bad about this one? Aside from being a straight blue it seems decent enough. Not really seeing the autism here.
No.121759
>>121758
Uh, literally everything? This profile *screams* desperation from the custom setting to the obvious wish fulfillment of being a college professor. Add in "not steampunk" to the fantasy magic shit, and you've got someone who's got super special snowflake syndrome down pat. Not to mention the super fucking cringey quote at the top. Holy shit, it's autism central and if you can't see that you're probably somewhere on the spectrum yourself.
No.121762
>>121757
>>121759
This is the most bizarre self-advertisement I've ever seen.
No.121765
>>121757
You know, I really liked Samuel's profile, back when he was a highschool student with Inaho for his character reference. But I swear to god the guy hates himself and actively seeks out ways to get himself cucked, and tries to force stupid cuck bullshit into every RP I've tried to do with him.
No.121766
>>121757
I played with him once, it honestly wasn't the worst. He was a little persistent about including some kind of NTR thing but luckily the character I was playing didn't understand the idea of emotional commitment anyway. Once we established that it was actually a very cute scene.
No.121769
>>121765
>>121766
Top Kek. A cuck in addition to all of the above. How hilariously funny. Guess we know where the autism comes from then.
No.121770
So someone alerted me to the fact that I was posted here. It's kinda nice to know that people at least somewhat enjoyed roleplaying with me despite my obsession with NTR and extreme self loathing.
>>121765
and
>>121766
Thanks for putting up with my stupid self esteem issues!
No.121771
>>121769
>>121770
So, do you have split personality disorder, or what?
No.121773
>>121772
>MS Paint doesn't exist guys, really!
Mmhmm, do tell.
No.121775
>>121773
I'm not really sure what that's meant to show to be honest.
No.121776
>>121775
The hashtags next to "Anonymous" indicate that posts >>121769, >>121770, and >>121772 all originate from the same IP. Meaning either you're samefagging, or two people are posting from the same connection.
No.121777
>>121776
Ah, okay. Well, I suppose I can just say this:
"MS Paint doesn't exist guys, really!"
No.121778
>>121777
Yes, because someone would go to the effort of making such a bizarre accusation without any reason and be able to throw something like >>121773 together in no time.
Look mate, if you want to be a bizarre bipolar autist, that's fine, but keep that shit on cancer sites like F-List where it belongs.
No.121779
>>121778
It's funny that you suggest something that you originally accused me of can't be done.
No.121780
>>121779
It's one thing to simply wipe the (You) and move some text around. It's quite another to do that for several posts, to say nothing of changing the color scheme to match the mod tool UI. But hey, if you want more proof, I could always just turn on poster IDs for a bit so you can see for yourself how blatantly obvious your samefaggotry is.
No.121781
>>121780
I guess? I mean, I don't really know how all this IP/poster ID stuff works. If it can be manipulated or not, as a mod or someone in a position of power like yours. I don't know how I'd gain anything from accusing myself of autism like that, or what you'd gain from accusing me of samefagging. I just know that someone posted here to shame me, and I was pleasantly surprised to find that people weren't totally hateful towards me. I'll be honest, I think that you were the one who posted the original comment and are now trying to pin it on me in some sort of weird scheme so that people will dislike me for samefagging. I can't prove it though, so I guess you win. Congrats.
No.121782
>>121781
>I guess? I mean, I don't really know how all this IP/poster ID stuff works.
Poster IDs are like the IDs used on /v/, where anytime one person posts in a thread, any further posts they make are all tagged with the same ID. For example, in this thread my poster ID would be 9c0bf1, while yours is 70714f. This is volatile between threads, so in another thread it'll be entirely different. The hashes I referenced earlier are consistent across threads, but only mods see them even when Poster IDs are enabled for the normal users.
>If it can be manipulated or not, as a mod or someone in a position of power like yours.
Not to my knowledge.
>I don't know how I'd gain anything from accusing myself of autism like that
Attention-whoring and sympathy, probably.
>I'll be honest, I think that you were the one who posted the original comment and are now trying to pin it on me in some sort of weird scheme so that people will dislike me for samefagging. I can't prove it though, so I guess you win.
And I can prove it's not, as you can see right now due to IDs being temporarily enabled. To be fair, I in turn can only prove it's the same IP posting, not the same person behind the computer, so if it really isn't you, sorry, but you may want to either secure your router better or start interrogating any roommates you might have.
No.121790
I'm turning IDs back off because I think anonymity is good for the board, especially considering what the F-List users behave like because of having identities. Keep the passive-aggressive attention whoring to dramawhore sites like F-List please.
No.121792
>>121782
Well, I guess we have to take it at your word that it can't be manipulated somehow. Not sure what you or anyone would have to gain from all this – but that's a horse that's been beaten to death. Pretty sure sympathy isn't gained from a website like this. For what its worth, I think its really suspicious that the person who was criticizing my profile mysteriously stopped posting the second you started trying to call me out for samefagging. Even now as I look at >>121783 who's linked two posts with the same poster ID, one of them says "(You)" and the other doesn't. So I don't know what to tell you. This all just seems highly suspect, especially after someone from this very thread also posted my profile and had some rather nasty things to say about it.
No.121793
>>121792
>Well, I guess we have to take it at your word that it can't be manipulated somehow.
Not really, nothing stopping you from going to >>>/sudo/ and asking them. If it CAN be fucked with I'd like to know, since that could make my job a lot harder if I can't trust these hashes.
>For what its worth, I think its really suspicious that the person who was criticizing my profile mysteriously stopped posting the second you started trying to call me out for samefagging.
That's my line.
>Even now as I look at >>121783 who's linked two posts with the same poster ID, one of them says "(You)" and the other doesn't.
Again, if that's true, the only thing I can imagine is that someone else on the same connection as you is posting here as well. With how incredibly small our population is, that hardly seems likely, but as they say truth is always stranger than fiction. If it's no one else in your household, you may have a neighbor or someone piggybacking off your Wi-Fi. I would recommend double-checking your security settings to be safe.
No.121795
Aw shit, I missed having an ID attached to my name? Fuck.
No.121796
>want to relate my experiences with Hartly being a weird motherfucker
>don't want to feed his self-depreciation fetish
hmhnhnhhnhnhnhngngngggnghgngh
No.121797
>>121796
Just post already. We want to hear.
No.121832
>>121766
>>121797
I'm a different anon than >>121796 but for what it's worth I've played with Hartly once in the past. I did get the impression that he as a player a little "weird" like they said, but I mean, we're all here to write collaborative erotica and that's a little weird by most people's standards as it is. The character I was playing his opposite was definitely not the kind who was going to be a part of his cuckoldry / NTR preference, not because I have anything against it but because my character, as part of their personality and moral code, wasn't going along with it. He kept dropping the topic, only to try to slyly bring it up in the future as a suggestion for where the story ought to go instead of taking the hint.
At that point I went my separate ways with him. I didn't think anything badly of him at the time. I just began to feel like we just weren't compatible. That was quite some time ago. A couple weeks back I came across a profile that's been mentioned in the most recent F-list profile thread that's up of a young widower / single father character. I liked the idea and it seemed cute, so I bookmarked him with the intention of contacting him when I had the spare time. I picked up on the likeness of the writing and kink that it was a Hartly alt, but as I said before I had nothing against the guy at the time, I just felt we weren't clicking. Feeling that we might get along better with different characters, I was still thinking of getting a hold of him.
Then a week ago, he posted a status update. Quote: "Seems like there's not much interest. Thinking about getting rid of this character." I felt like that was kind of an immature way of trying to get attention, but I didn't pay too much mind to it until I saw the drama in this thread unravel. Now I'm completely turned off. Look, I'm not here to kinkshame. If you get off on feeling inferior, humiliated or whatever, that's all fine and good. There's plenty of others who feel the same and there's even a fairly active thread that's been up recently for that kind of thing. But doing what you did in this thread and then going through all those mental gymnastics trying to pretend like it wasn't you (and then accuse the mod of singling you out on top of it, like they don't have anything else better to do with all the shit this board has been through lately) is ridiculous. Keep your drama in-character, please. You're definitely not going to attract partners when you make an ass out of yourself like this.
No.121835
>>121796
>>121832
>>121797
ok i'll bite - i actually am that anon
i've played with sam once (back when he was called "niceguysam" and was a high schooler) where we planned a super cheesy sort of high school first-time crushes-fucking scene. his character kept being really depreciating like "HOW COULD YOU EVER LIKE ME, I'M JUST A NERDY WIMP LOSER" which i didn't mind because it's cutesy high school bullshit, and later on during the actual sex he made a point to make clear just how bad at sex his character was, which again i didn't mind because awkward virgins having sex scene.
after the fact he tried to introduce the idea of a BIG STRONG MAN sweeping me off my character's feet, which i said no to, and again he kept trying to re-introduce the idea through less direct suggestions (such as my character breaking up with him and fucking one of the high school jocks before they reconvened and even up to the point of suggesting that she get raped and have sam be crushed, cucking and rape being stuff on my 'no' list)
that's about when i sort of dropped the scene, eventually nuked the profile - fast forward a year or two, i've got a magic-related character, he approaches me because he re-vamped sam as a magic professor, and he proposes the idea of having my character fall for his since she'd be a student of his. i entertain the idea because i'm a total sucker for may-december romances and professional/personal relationships being blurred. eventually he brings up the idea of my character get fucked in front of him by a rival teacher or something, i don't remember the specifics - i think he might have suggested the use of a "love potion" or whatever on my character to get her to cuck him
i'm pretty sure at one point he asked to eat the creampie out of either of those characters too but that COULD have been somebody else
basically the dude's weird and that's coming from me
No.121836
>>121832
>>121835
This is a shame because I liked an idea he pitched in another thread, a love triangle where a girl gets seduced away from her steady boyfriend and then the three of them have to deal with their various feelings. But if it's just about getting cucked, the emotions and awkward triangle are wasted.
No.121844
>>121836
That's exactly what I mean. I'm a slut for drama within the context of a story and that's not even a bad idea for a central source of conflict to build a story around. The problem, like you said, though is in its purpose being kink-driven rather than for the sake of plot. It could work if both parties were into it, sure, but the ulterior motive is just too strong otherwise as has been proven in this thread.
No.121845
>>121844
>The problem, like you said, though is in its purpose being kink-driven rather than for the sake of plot.
Would other kinks driving that same idea be as bad?
No.121849
>>121845
No, not necessarily. You can absolutely write a story that's pure fetish fuel, but both writers need to be on board from the get-go about their interest in it. In the aforementioned cases the issue is that Hartly was pushing to include this kink when it wasn't welcomed or wanted and that's where the wagon lost a wheel. With two willing parties and a mutual interest, there's no limit to what kinks you could build something around. As I said before, I don't even dislike cuckoldry as a kink. I'm indifferent to it, but the particular character I played wasn't going to have any part of it and he kept insisting, which led to the issue.
No.121853
>ITT: Weird self-deprecating cuck shit
>Even a board volunteer calls him on it and he STILL tries to backpedal
I thought this was the "shittiest profile" thread, not the autism thread.
No.121854
>>121832
Real talk, I'm 100% serious when I say that I didn't samefag in this thread. I'm not sure how or why, but there's definitely some foul play here as I live alone and am pretty damn sure my WiFi is secure. I mean, not even sure about how to go about proving that, or even know how someone might do it. I did the best I could by posting the screenshot, but apparently faking it is too easy or something. So whatever.
I guess the gist of it all is that yeah, I'm pretty weird. I know I have a really niche fetish, and that not a lot of people are into it. I only popped in here before when someone told me I was posted here, and wanted to thank the people who had kind words for me since I know I can be a bit of an odd duck sometimes. But with all that said, I think it should be known that although I asked about, talked over, and was rather persistent about *wanting* to include that kink, never once did I actively engage in it with someone without their consent. Yes, it led to otherwise normal and quite enjoyable roleplays fizzling out due to disinterest. But never once did I try to force an RP down that road. Only ever asked about it. Because yeah, I do agree. It's a fetish that doesn't work unless both parties are interested. And yeah, I do agree that it's a fetish that's only interesting if there's an emotional aspect to it – something that's more about the adultery than the cucking. So take that for what it's worth.
In the end, I guess I'm just sad that I wanted to thank people for being nice and got crucified for it. Thanks to those who had kind words, and sorry to those who I let down by being a weirdo. I'll take my leave now and hope that some day people will forget all this. It looks like its all I can do since apparently nobody wants to believe my side of the story.
That being said, if anyone can think of a way I can prove my innocence, let me know? I mean, like I said; I'm still looking at a post where people link two posts, and one of them says (You) next to it, and the other doesn't. If there's some way I can have someone verify that it's true, then PLEASE let me know. I'd hate to have this be the end of my roleplay here.
No.121856
>>121854
I would say take a photo of the thread using a phone or something, but its still possible to fudge with that.
No.121861
>>121835
Haha cucks am I right? Haha.
No.121863
>>121854
I don't know what to tell you. You have the same IP, which means if I banned >>121757 , you'd be banned. Assuming you're not bullshitting, the only possible answer I can come up with at this point is that you're on a shared connection of some kind or another, like if you shared the same IP as every other connection in your office or apartment building or something like that, and even then I don't know if you'd have the same IP. If you're telling the truth, it's fucking weird, but again, truth is stranger than fiction, so who knows.
>I'd hate to have this be the end of my roleplay here.
What? You're Anonymous, as long as you don't have a crippling case of narcissism like Fai and insist on namefagging 24/7 you can easily just start anew here. The only reason I brought this up to begin with was when >>121759 started insulting other users for, as near as I could tell, being sympathetic to himself who he was pretending he wasn't for whatever autistic reason. If you're not seeing a (You) on his posts, he's not seeing one on yours, so it's not like he can follow you into every thread to fuck with you as long as you're Anon.
No.121864
>>121853
You can't contain the autism.
No.121866
>>121863
Aren't (you)s cookie based anyway? IIRC they keep showing even with IP changing but not on separate devices sitting in my one WiFi router.
No.121867
>>121866
Might be? I honestly don't know. Still means that he and his doppelganger posted from the same IP within five minutes of each other though, and it's the same IP both of them have used throughout this thread, so unless they both hang out at the same library to browse /erp/ or something, shit's really weird.
No.121868
>>121867
It's happened before on other boards, where different posters have the same IDs. Might be a site error.
No.121869
>>121868
Entirely possible, considering how delightfully buggy this site is. Still a very incredible coincidence considering it's the same person for this specific thing, and within five minutes of each other, and that our doppelganger mysteriously just stopped posting entirely.
No.121870
>>121867
Basically it still can be him just from 2 devices, browsers or maybe even just incognito window.
No.121871
>>121870
Oh I absolutely haven't ruled that out, especially considering how much attention whoring and drama F-List users like to incite. Still, there ARE other possibilities, and I'm not a fan of "guilty until proven innocent."
No.121872
>>121871
Main thing that holds me suspicious is that the complaints about the profile it all started with are so inane - it's nitpicking just to insult the user, but then everybody else has other very clear beef with him, which the original poster somehow omits.
No.121876
>>121854
>That being said, if anyone can think of a way I can prove my innocence, let me know?
Have your mystery roommate come back and explain why he shares your IP.
No.121884
>Slowly watching this unfold
>All I can think about is how I want the pre-purge /erp/ back compared to this shit.
Wowzers.
No.121899
>>121884
Frankly I want the pre Fai /erp/ but we can't always get what we want right?
No.121900
>>121863
>>121867
In regards to the whole mystery "same IP," there have been a couple times in the past where I've tried to post but I've been told I'm banned for making a post I've never seen before. Now, unless my mother who can't download a Steam game, father who can't go through the windows set up or sister who can't beat Skryim on apprentice difficulty have been spamming CP links, something is weird. There may be some sort of VPN like program that uses random "innocent" IPs that one of the users was posting with? Or, much more likely, Codemonkey/Jim/Spicytires/Whoever the hell runs this place anymore fucked up.
No.121905
>>121900
Most ISPs use a rotating pool of IPs and you get one at random whenever you connect to them - mostly at a reboot of your router. So somebody used it in the past, posted shit, then it landed to you. I get it occasionally on 4chan - the way it stops you posting to declare that you HAD ban some time ago and it expired - I once got a ban notice from two years before I even started using the mobile provider I got it on.
But at THIS close time? Level of coincidence is ridiculous.
No.121906
OP here, I wish I could still delete the entire thread to save the board from this evil.
No.121908
>>121906
10 replies and I'll do it.
No.121910
>>121908
>>121906
As much as it was entertaining, pls lock and somebody can make a new one?
No.121911
>>121906
>>121908
We need to contain it, if not purge it altogether.
No.121912
>>121908
Will you do it quicker if I post cute anime girls?
No.121913
>>121908
Chef, if I spam post another six times does that count as five responses?
What if I use my VPN and spam post you in ways you can't trace?
I mean the 'Fai' name will still be there…
No.121914
>>121908
Do not abuse your power. The thread's fine. Let the idiots be idiots.
No.121924
>>121908
Burn it. In the end it's better for everyone, Hartly included.
No.121933
>>121908
Make me forget, based mod.
No.121934
No.121935
>>121908
>second Fai vote
>>121913
>Chef, if I spam post another six times does that count as five responses?
No.
>What if I use my VPN and spam post you in ways you can't trace?
Yes.
No.121936
>>121908
We're a democracy now? How many votes do you need to ban Fai?
No.121937
>>121936
An infinite amount, because permanent bans only last 90 days and
>Heavy VPN use
:^)
No.121939
>ITT: Fai shitposters
STILL BETTER THAN CUCK FAGGOTRY
No.121941
>>121939
I swear it wasn't me, I have no idea why we have the same IP!
>inb4 MS Paint fakery
>inb4 using your mod powers to manipulate the IDs
No.121942
>>121939
>>121941
There's not enough salt to cover up the taste of that burn.
No.121944
>>121943
so will justice be served yet or do we have to wait another 20 minutes
No.121945
>>121944
…Do you actually want me to lock/delete the thread.
No.121947
>>121945
Clearly it's never going to get back on topic at this point.
No.121948
>>121945
…
What was the point in the 'vote'?
No.121950
>>121939
You're a volunteer, your job is to clear spam, not input on threads or take sides. Get over your role, and just do what you are supposed to, without interfering.
No.121953
The fact that we're still talking about this just goes to show this is going to take forever to become a shitty f-list profile thread again, and not the dedicated "shit on hartly" thread. We're so far off the rails it's not even funny, and there is a vocal calling for a reset. We can just make another thread afterwards, it's not like we're running out of front page real estate around here.
No.121954
>>121953
I can't lock or delete it otherwise I get spammed with reports from other volunteers saying "DO UR JAWB." OP will have to delete it if he wants to make a less shitty thread.
No.121955
>>121954
…
What was the point in the 'vote'?
No.121956
>>121955
I was going to lock or delete it once the vote got called. Proceeded to get backlash. Not my fault.
No.121957
I'm going to go ahead and just lock the thread at this point, since I doubt we're going to make any progress on this little riddle, for what little that matters. That said, I honestly don't see this thread serving any real purpose that the F-List/Bitching/Autism trifecta doesn't already cover, so I'd appreciate if you kept this to the containment threads we already have. Three is honestly too many as is, and I'm strongly considering just merging all three into one thread at this point.