/cuteboys/ - Boypussy

Bump

just use your finger to push them in when you take a shower

BIDET MY MAN

>>362282

I do but they pop back out. I want my butthole to look cute always.

Hemorrhoids can and will only get worse. Swallow up your pride and have them removed.

When they already pop out you are down the road way too much already and only mechanical removal is an option (to be fair, mechanical removal, one way or another, is the only option for almost all types of hemorrhoids, save the mildest ones). Any cream you can buy at this point can only offer symptomatic relief.

>>362311

So I'm going to have to have them removed then. What am I in for with doing this?

Well OP.

Im sadly afflicted by chronic (painless thank god) hemorrhoids. Something something genetically weak anal tissue..

For that reason I see the doc once every year and let me tell you its easzy af. Pick one with good ratings, come early because not many assdocs are around so people will crowd around them and then youll be out in under an hour.

What they do is the following:

>Anon pls lie on your side and pull down your pants

(only as far as that your hole is not exposed not your balls-easy.)

Then he lubes up his gloved fingers slips a littel funnel thing in your butt that can be spread in some way apparently. It doesnt hurt and the medical lube makes it in go quick.

>Oh Anon I see you have indeed X kind of hemorrhoids, pls clench when I say so ok?

Then you clench and hell do something that feels like a very mild and short sting, more weird then painful.

"Ok thats it anon, now let me tell you about nutrition and how to have a soft stool"

And then you thank him kindly and go out.

This procedure usually lasts only a few minutes minus the talking.

>>362358

>Then he lubes up his gloved fingers slips a littel funnel thing in your butt

What's wrong with that?

>>362691

Just don't say to him "yes, now spank me daddy!" and you will be okay.

>>362704

You joke but wersonally when i finally go for a prostate exam that's what I'm worried about the most. It's be pretty obvious my ass is no stranger to big hard things going inside and I'll probably get an involuntary boner from him fingering my ass tbh so that will be one awkward visit.

>>362728

Just give a moan and they know enough. I had one once and the doctor was kind enough to keep playing with me

I noticed I had one a couple weeks ago and it doesn't seem like it's gotten any better. Does anyone with experience with hemorrhoids have any advice or anything? Or should I just give up and go see a doctor?

Everyone should immediately start squatting instead of sitting on the toilet. There are little u-shaped stands you can buy (or build yourself) that go around a sitting toilet to facilitate this, or if you're tiny and agile (like I am) you can just put your feet right on the seat. Also eat right, and shit immediately when you feel the urge, not on any sort of "schedule".

Shitting should take less than a minute, be almost effortless, and be complete. If this is not the case for you, you have a problem. No sitting there for fifteen goddamn minutes reading news on your phone while pushing, like seems to be common for Americans. When you're done, the entire rectum should be emptied, not just half of it pushed out and pinched off; any enema afterwards should just be washing out residue, not any large chunks.

I've heard that squatting can make existing hemorrhoids shrink and even disappear, but if nothing else it will greatly help prevent new ones, or recurrence of old ones. I've been doing this for over ten years, am in my 30's, and frequently having anal sex or using dildos, and had no issue with hemorrhoids at all.

>>365861

That's a ton of effort that won't solve the problem at all. You don't have hemorrhoids because you sit on a toilet for 60 seconds a day. You have hemorrhoids because you sit in a computer chair for 16 hours a day.

>>365884

If this were true, then every schoolchild would have them, too.

>>365861

>if you're tiny and agile (like I am) you can just put your feet right on the seat

No. Even if you are light, never do this.

Your weight is suppose to be spread across the bowl, not focused on the edges of the seat. You'll break the seat and seriously fuck yourself when the porcelain cuts your ass apart.

I'd post the image of one Asian that tore his whole thigh apart by doing that on an American bathroom.

>>365976

Paranoia isn't good for you, either. There are people who get cut on toilets breaking even when using them normally. I'm not about to go changing what I do because of something that has less chance of happening than getting struck by lightning.

>>366006

Anon he's spot on, toilets are literally not designed for the way you're using them. They make like step stools and stuff for what you wanna do but standing on the rim of the seat like a goblin is a very, very bad idea.

>>366006

Just buy a fucking squat toilet before the seat gives in to the repeated stress.

And I don't mean a squat toilet that fucks you.

Poor joke, I know

>>365861

You should also take anal only in the squatting position, with your feet by your ears.

The tendon which cuts off poop when standing up can be damaged by pooping as per usual on a toilet, and by improper buttsex, which causes incontinence in old people and well fucked cuteboys.

Keep your knees in your chest when you poop or fuck.

>>365972

Schoolchildren don't suffer from a lot of conditions that adults do because they have the raw power of youth. You won't see kids with carpel tunnel from typing on a keyboard the whole life or blurry vision from staring at a monitor their whole life either, but it doesn't change the fact that this is where they're going to end up.

>>366040

>Keep your knees in your chest when you poop

like lean forward?

>>366034

>buy a fucking squat toilet

I'm sure proposing this will go over REALLY well with my landlord. There isn't even any room in there for some kind of stool; the goddamn toilet is two inches from the wall on one side, and the shower door on the other. I'd have to be fucking Spiderman with my legs splayed onto the walls, in order to not be on the seat. As much as I would prefer to do it more safely, there's just no practical way unless I get some 2x4s and start drilling bolts into the walls.

>>366040

Anal sex leading to incontinence is meme propaganda spread by the anti-gay establishment, nothing more.

>>366081

Ask me how I know you're virgin.

>>366092

Oh, you sad, stupid, pathetic little boy.

I lost my virginity at the age of eleven, and can almost guarantee that was before you were even BORN.

>>366081

>Anal sex leading to incontinence is meme propaganda spread by the anti-gay establishment, nothing more.

I'm sure it does happen. I don't doubt there are retards out there who think they can just jam whatever in without lube or warmup, and end up tearing things that don't heal right.

Where the propaganda is wrong is in suggesting that that's normal.